Archive for WWE World Tag Team Championship

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 3/27/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

Cool Smackdown open, then the show opens with CM PUNK!  Jim Ross and Tazz welcome us to Smackdown.  All of the other MITB participants are in the ring.  How many freakin’ preview matches are they going to do?

CM Punk, WWE United States Champion Montel Vontavious Porter, Mark Henry (w/ Tony Atlas), & Kofi Kingston vs. Kane, Christian, Shelton Benjamin, & Finlay (w/ Hornswoggle).  So it’s a Parajes Incredibles match… except it’s quartets instead of pairs.  Kingston and Christian start.  Christian has really been working his ass off since returning.  Christian hits his reverse DDT for a near fall.  Kingston fights back and tags out to Punk, he hilos in onto Christian.  Christian ducks one of Punk’s strikes.  Punk ends up tying up Christian in an Anaconda Vice on the ropes, then hits a diving crossbody for a near fall.  Finlay comes in and goes at it with Punk.  I want a singles match between those two.  Punk goes for the Go 2 Sleep, but Kane big boots Punk.  Kane goozles Finlay for no apparent reason.  Insta-commercial.  Punk reaches for the tag, but is held back by Benjamin.  He manages to tag Henry.  Benjamin steps out and lets Kane take over, so we have a battle of the two least talented guys in the match.  That doesn’t last long, as MVP comes in.  He gets the better of Kane, but then gets punched in the face.  Benjamin comes in and attacks MVP.  They announce that Benjamin will get a rematch for the title next week.  Benjamin works over MVP.  Kane tags in and beats on MVP.  Lukewarm tag to Punk, who attacks Kane with his various kicks.  Kane counters the corner bulldog attempt but gets kicked in the face.  Punk springboards off the ropes but gets caught and chokeslammed by Kane, who gets the pin for his team at 7:26 shown.  Clusterfuck brawl after the match.  Christian brings in a ladder and climbs for the briefcase, but Hornswoggle goes after him.  Finlay and Hornswoggle push the ladder over and send Christian crashing into the pile of guys at ringside.  The match wasn’t very good, but sadly it was the best of these Money In The Bank preview matches I’ve seen.

Orton/Triple H replay #72 billion TONIGHT!

Handicap Match: Jesse & Festus vs. The Big Show.  They show Show’s KO punch to Edge from this past Raw.  The bell rings, Festus goes crazy, and Big Show destroys both of them.  Festus finally lands a bicycle kick to knock Show off his feet, which just pisses Show off.  KO punch to Festus and a chokeslam to Jesse.  Show KO punches Jesse for good measure and pins him at 2:26.  Remember when this act actually got pushed?  Festus is a great character.

12 Rounds hype.  Bleh.

Jeff Hardy interview TONIGHT!

Hardy vs. Hardy history video.

Matt Hardy is in the locker room with his dog.  He cuts his usual promo on Jeff.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.  These two always have good matches.  It’s not often that Rey gets to work with a guy he can do his shit with, and it’s not often Chavo works with a guy who gives him anything.  Nice stuff to start, then Chavo takes a neat bump out of the ring and Mysterio follows him with a baseball slide into a headscissors.  Chavo hits an avalanche Frankensteiner for a near fall.  Chavo clamps in a rear chinlock, but Mysterio kicks him in the head to get out of it.  Mysterio kicks Chavo a bunch.  Chavo catches a springboarding Mysterio and ties him in the tree of woe.  Mysterio dodges a charge hits the Bombs Away and springboard crossbody for a near fall.  Rey rolls through a sunset flip attempt and kicks Chavo.  Chavo hits the Gory Bomb for a believable false finish.  Mysterio ranas Chavo into the 619 position.  Chavo somehow avoids it and goes for the Three Amigos.  He counters the third, but Chavo hits a backdrop suplex and goes for the frog splash.  Rey avoids it and hits a headscissors, then the 619 and his own frog splash for the win at 5:28.  JBL comes out of nowhere and blasts Mysterio with a big boot.  Really good little match.

For some reason, they feel the need to replay Cena’s reading of his get well card for Vickie.  Cena is headed to the ring!

Cena comes down to the ring and talks about WrestleMania.  Big Show comes out to talk about how much he loves Vickie Guerrero.  They agree to have a match on Raw I think.  Cena grabs Show’s leg as he leaves the ring and makes him tumble to the ground.

Hype for the Triple H/Orton hype.

R-Truth vs. Matt Hardy.  Matt shows lots of aggression and busts out some moves I don’t recall ever seeing him do.  Matt wins with the Twist of Fate at 3:07.

Replay of the Undertaker/Shawn Michaels segment from Raw.  Tonight: Shawn Michaels’ tribute to the Undertaker.

The Colons and their Bella come to the ring for their match.  Commercial!

2 weeks ago: the challenge for the double title at at WrestleMania and the breakup of the Bella Twins.

WWE Tag Team Champions Carlito & Primo Colon & Brie Bella vs. World Tag Team Champions John Morrison & The Miz & Nikki Bella.  Primo and Miz start.  Morrison gets a cheap shot in to let Miz get the advantage.  Morrison tags in and beats up Primo.  Hot tag to Carlito, he cleans Morrison’s clock.  Carlito hits a swinging neckbreaker and covers, but Miz saves.  Primo takes out Miz and the Bellas get into a cat fight.  Morrison gets a quick near fall with a schoolboy, then goes for a suplex.  Carlito counters in mid air with the Backstabber for the win at 2:26.

Hype for the Michaels/Undertaker and Triple H/Orton hype.

Jeff Hardy is in a dark room.  He cuts the usual promo on Matt.  They’ll go to war at WrestleMania!

Ross and Tazz run down the WrestleMania card.

They finally show the obligatory replay of the Legacy beatdown on Triple H and Orton’s DDT and kiss to Stephanie from Raw.

WWE Divas Championship Match: Maryse (c) vs. Michelle McCool.  Michelle finally gets her rematch for the title nobody cares about.  They lock up and roll out of the ring.  They break, crawl slowly back into the ring, and lock up again, then finally do some holds.  They fight outside the ring again, then come back in.  Maryse hits a lazy thrust kick for a near fall.  Michelle hits some kicks.  GAIL KIM appears and dropkicks Michelle to cause the DQ at 2:59.  She takes down Maryse too, then poses with the belt.

12 Rounds.  I don’t care.

Shawn Michaels’ tribute to the Undertaker is NEXT!

A bunch of druids dressed in white come out, then Shawn Michaels enters in an all-white version of Undertaker’s entrance attire.  He quotes some scripture and cuts a promo on Undertaker.  Then his music plays and he does a strip tease.  Undertaker pops out from under the ring and goes for the chokeslam, but Michaels escapes.  Michaels dances on the stage as Taker stands in the ring and looks angry.  Fade to black.

Okay show all in all.

WWE ECW 3/17/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

Cold open this week.  Finlay and Hornswoggle arrive and meet Teddy Long, clad in St. Patrick’s day attire.  Hornswoggle disappears to cause mischief.  ECW open.

Todd Grisham and Matt Striker welcome us to wherever the hell we are.  They taped last night, so I guess it’s San Antonio.

Christian & MVP vs. WWE United States Champion Shelton Benjamin & Mark Henry (w/ Tony Atlas).  MVP and Benjamin start.  They’ll wrestle for the title this week on Smackdown.  Commercial.  Steve Austin Hall of Fame commercial.  Back to the match, where Henry has MVP in a bearhug.  MVP plays face in peril for a while.  He counters a Paydirt attempt with an overhead belly-to-belly and makes the hot tag to Christian.  Christian hits his reverse DDT on Benjamin for a near fall, decks Mark Henry on the apron, hits a monkey flip and a sunset flip out of the corner for a near fall.  Christian hits a tornado DDT and covers, but Mark Henry comes in and pulls him off the cover.  MVP comes in and he and Christian deal with Henry.  Christian decks Tony Atlas, but Benjamin hits him with the Paydirt for the win at 8:56.  Good match.

12 Rounds plug.  I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF THIS MOVIE and it hasn’t even come out yet.

Finlay looks for Hornswoggle and finds DJ Gabriel and Alicia Fox, who are dancing.

EVAN F’N BOURNE RETURNS TONIGHT!

WrestleMania XX video from last night or last week or whenever the hell they showed it.

Jamie Noble vs. Evan Bourne.  FUCK YEAH!  Awesome fast paced match.  Tyson Kidd and Natalya watch backstage.  Noble slows Bourne down by putting him in a facelock.  Bourne escapes and knees Noble in the face, then hits a swank rana.  Bourne hits a standing moonsault for a near fall.  Bourne heads to the top rope.  Noble stops him but gets kicked in the face a few times.  Bourne hits the Shooting Star press for the win at 2:56.  That ruled for a few minutes.  I want Bourne vs. Tyson Kidd!

Finlay finds Hornswoggle throwing stuff at Katie Lea.  Commercial.

Randy Orton/Triple H hype video.

Smackdown’s 500th episode this Friday night!

ECW Champion Jack Swagger comes out so the fans can look at him, then leaves.  That was pointless.

Tiffany convinces Teddy Long to have a divas night on ECW.  Paul Burchill and Katie Lea barge in to bitch about Hornswoggle.  Long books Burchill vs. Finlay tonight.

Tonight: The Dirt Sheet!

Edge/Vickie/Show/Cena stuff from Raw last night.

Paul Burchill (w/ Katie Lea) vs. Finlay (w/ Hornswoggle).  Finlay destroys Burchill as Hornswoggle bothers the announcers.  Finlay sends a charging Burchill out of the ring, but then the distraction allows Burchill to get a cheap shot and get the advantage.  Finlay gets beat up for a bit, then hits the Celtic Cross for the win at 3:05.

The Dirt Sheet is NEXT!

Undertaker/Michaels hype.

12 Rounds hype.  WHY DO THEY HAVE TO HYPE THIS FUCKING MOVIE 2-4 TIMES EVERY FUCKING SHOW?

The Dirt Sheet.  I’ve never seen one of these.  World Tag Team Champions The Miz and John Morrison with the Bella Twins.  Brie seems unhappy to be there, while Nikki seems happy.  They show Miz and Morrison beating Carlito and Primo on Smackdown last week.  Miz and Morrison put on masks of butts with afros.  WWE Tag Team Champions The Colons come down and bring the Carlito’s Cabana set.  The Colons challenge Miz & Morrison to a tag title unification match at WrestleMania, and they accept.  The Colons spit apples at Miz and Morrison but miss and hit the Bella that likes Miz and Morrison.  She shoves the Bella who likes Primo and Carlito.  CATFIGHT!  Each team ends up with one of the twins.  Fin.  Fun show.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 3/13/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

Smackdown opens with a replay of the Edge/Show/Cena contract signing from Raw and the revelation of the Show/Vickie affair.

There’s a new Smackdown open since the last time I watched it.  Jim Ross and Tazz are on commentary.  Tonight, The Undertaker takes on Vladimir Kozlov!  Also, Matt Hardy is going to tell all!

Non-Title: World Heavyweight Champion Edge vs. Kofi Kingston.  Kofi finally gets his shot at revenge for Edge taking him out at No Way Out and taking his spot in the Elimination Chamber, where Edge won the World Title.  Back and forth action for a minute and a half, Edge bails, insta-commercial.  During the break, Kofi took a bump out of the ring.  Edge works Kofi over.  Edge heads to the top rope, but Kofi trips him, then kicks him off the apron and hits a crossbody out of the ring and onto Edge.  Kofi hits a pair of big splashes for a near fall.  I missed some action because my evil nephews are in my room being disruptive.  On the outside, Kofi sends Edge into the steps, just like Edge did to him at No Way Out.  Back in the ring, Kofi hnits a diving cross body for a near fall.  Edge nails him in the face with a boot.  He goes for the spear, but Kofi leapfrogs him and gets a near fall with a sunset flip.  Edge blocks the Trouble In Paradise and locks in the Sharpshooter for the win at 6:59+ commercials.  Nice little match.

Replay of the Triple H/Orton angle from Raw.  World Tag Team Titles on the line NEXT!

Plug for Cena’s movie.

World Tag Team Championship Match: John Morrison & The Miz (c) vs. WWE Tag Team Champions Carlito & Primo Colon (w/ The Bella Twins).  These teams have been having quite the series of matches lately from what I’ve heard.  Carlito starts with quick pin attempts on Morrison.  Primo and Miz go at it, then Carlito tags in and they double team Miz for a near fall.  Carlito decks Morrison and knocks him off the apron.  Morrison recovers and helps Miz double team Carlito for a near fall.  Carlito takes the heat for a bit, then makes the hot tag to Primo.  Primo hits a diving headbutt on Morrison, then tosses Miz out of the ring.  Primo tags out and monkey flips Morrison, then Carlito clotheslines him for a near fall.  Primo and Miz get sent out of the ring and Morrison hits the Moonlight Drive on Carlito for the win at 5:58.  The Bellas leave with Miz and Morrison.

Tonight, Undertaker vs. Kozlov!

Another bit of the Triple H/Orton angle from Raw.

Tonight, Matt Hardy tells all!

Triple H/Orton video AGAIN.

R-Truth comes out.  Commerical!

WrestleMania hype.

MVP & R-Truth vs. WWE United States Champion Shelton Benjamnin & Chavo Guerrero Jr.  R-Truth blasts Chavo with a kick early on and gets a near fall, then tags in MVP.  MVP and R-Truth take turns working over Chavo.  Shelton declines to tag in until Chavo gets the advantage.  Heels get heat on R-Truth and my young nephew is really fucking obnoxious.  I wish it was still acceptable to backhand a child.  MVP gets the hot tag and cleans house.  He hits the Ballin’ elbow drop on Benjamin for a near fall.  He ducks a shot from Chavo and pulls him into the ring.  Truth runs for Chavo, but gets backdropped out of the ring.  MVP sends Chavo out, but Benjamin hits the Paydirt on MVP for the pin at 6:03.

Matt Hardy is headed to the ring.

Last week, Matt cost Jeff Hardy a Money In The Bank Qualifying Match.

Matt comes out and cuts his promo on Jeff.  He talks about Jeff’s house burning down and pulls out the dog collar that belongs to Jeff’s dog that died in the fire.  Jeff comes out and snatches the microphone from him.  Jeff says Matt was responsible for everything and that Matt hates him, but Matt hates himself more.  Jeff beats the shit out of him and Matt begs off.

Long black screen, then a replay of what just happened.

WWE Divas Champion Maryse & Michelle McCool vs. WWE Women’s Champion Melina & Maria.  McCool destroys Maria, then the champs go at it.  Melina pins Maryse with an inside cradle at 2:44.  Maryse and McCool have a catfight after the match.

Edge and Chavo chat backstage.  Edge gets the idea that Chavo has eyes for Vickie and chokes him.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match, NEXT!

WrestleMania video, this time hyping WrestleMania XX.  That boot trick that Eddie pulled on Kurt Angle was absolutely brilliant.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match:
Finlay (w/ Hornswoggle) vs. Brian Kendrick (w/ Ezekiel Jackson).  This is for the final spot in the MITB match at WrestleMania.  Zeke takes a cheap shot at Finlay before the match starts.  Instead of allowing Kendrick to get the early advantage, it just pisses Finlay off.  Finlay kicks his ass.  Kendrick slaps Finlay and hides behind Zeke.  Zeke distracts Finlay long enough to let Kendrick hit a dive and get the advantage.  Kendrick hits a missile dropkick for a near fall.  Finlay utilizes his awesome “trap the other guy on the apron” trick on Kendrick.  Kendrick goes for the Sliced Bread #2, but Finlay hits the Schwein, er… Celtic Cross, for the win at 3:12.

Main event is NEXT!

Another plug for Cena’s movie.  I still don’t care.

Ross and Tazz run down the WrestleMania card.

Undertaker enters for the main event.  Commercial!

Kozlov pinned Undertaker a couple of weeks ago on Smackdown.

The Undertaker vs. Vladimir Kozlov.  Boring brawl, commercial, Undertaker hits that awesome apron leg drop.  Taker chokes Kozlov a bit, then Kozlov gets the advantage and beats on him.  Taker backdrops Kozlov out of a headlock and hammers him with punches.  Taker hits the snake eyes, but Kozlov headbutts him in the gut.  More Taker punches.  Taker hits Old School, chokeslam, and Tombstone for the victory (around 10 minutes shown).

Fun show, nothing offensive went long.

WWE Monday Night Raw 3/9/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

Okay, so I started watching the show and 10 minutes in my computer crashed from trying to burn a DVD and rip a VHS at the same time.  So, quick rundown of the first 10 minutes from memory:

WWE open, replay of the Triple H/Orton angle from last week, then Legacy going after him on Smackdown.  They show a shot of “Orton’s house in Saint Louis,” where he’ll be giving a live interview from tonight.  Triple H vs. Rhodes and Dibiase in a Handicap Match tonight.

Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler welcome us LIVE to Jacksonville, Florida as Shawn Michaels makes his way to the ring.  He talks about facing The Undertaker at WrestleMania, then they play the video of all of Taker’s WrestleMania wins.  Taker appears behind them and they banter back and forth.

What did Cena say to Vickie on Smackdown last week?  Commercial, and I get my computer back up.

Hall of Fame hype.

Lillian Garcia announces that the following contest is for the Intercontinental Championship!

WWE Intercontinental Championship Match: CM Punk (c) vs. John Bradshaw Layfield.  They go back and forth, then JBL ends up on the outside and Punk hits a weak dive onto him.  Commercial.  Back from break, JBL has Punk in an abdominal stretch.  JBL continues to wear down Punk and tries to get the victory, but Punk won’t go down without a fight.  Punk manages to hit a Tornado DDT for a near fall and starts building his usual comeback.  Punk goes for the Go 2 Sleep, but JBL rakes his eyes and hits the Clothesline From Hell for the win and the title at 9:32.  Sucks that Punk lost, but at least the finish didn’t make him look weak.

Randy Orton is shown in his “house” with his “wife.”

Vickie Guerrero tells JBL that she did him a favor by giving him the title match, now he has to a favor for her.  Edge wants to know what Cena said to Vickie on Smackdown last week.  Vickie says it doesn’t matter,  Edge agrees, because it’s more important that he is signing his WrestleMania contract tonight.

Lawler and Cole are at the table.  I have that WWE Crest t-shirt that Lawler is wearing.  They interview Orton from “his house.”  They replay the angle from Smackdown, with Orton kicking Triple H in the head repeatedly.  Orton babbles on some more.  Cole says they’ll be asking him more questions throughout the night.  Women’s Champion vs. Divas Champion match, next!

Non-Title: WWE Divas Champion Maryse vs. WWE Women’s Champion Melina.  All of the other divas are at ringside.  It’s not officially a Lumberjack Match, but when Melina gets through out of the ring, the Smackdown divas throw her back in.  Maryse gets the pin at 2:13, then all the divas get into a big brawl.  The face divas stand tall at the end.

Last Friday: Cena interrupted the Edge/Big Show contract signing for WrestleMania, then he whispered something in Vickie’s ear that upset her.  Tonight, the contract signing FOR REAL!  It’s NEXT!

WrestleMania hype video: WrestleMania VI!

Vickie Guerrero is in the ring being obnoxious.  She announces a 25 Diva battle royal for WrestleMania.  She introduces Show, then Edge.  Edge makes references to WrestleMania VI.  They sign, then Cena comes out.  Edge and Show decide to dispose of him, but Vickie says she invited him out there.  Cena signs the contract too, so I guess that means a Triple Threat Match.  Cena says he told Vickie he loves her on Smackdown.  Edge says he doesn’t.  Cena admits that he doesn’t, then shows a video of Show and Vickie kissing.  Vickie tells Show she hopes he wins at WrestleMania, then slaps his ass.  Cena makes an I Love Lucy reference, Edge gets mad, and we go to commercial.

WWE Rewind: Last week’s Jericho/Snuka angle.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston.  I guess Kofi didn’t drop off the face of the earth after being attacked by Edge at No Way Out.  Fine little athletic match.  Jericho powebombs Kofi out of the corner for a near fall and stomps on him.  Commercial!  I bet when we come back, Jericho has Kofi in a submission hold.  I win!  Jericho has Kofi in a sleeper on the ground.  Kofi escapes and makes a comeback.  He hits a crossbody, but Jericho rolls through it for a near fall.  He goes for his weird ground move, but Jericho punches him in the wang or something and goes for the Walls.  Kofi counters and Jericho hits an enzuigiri for a near fall.  Jericho hits the bulldog and misses the Lionsault.  Kofi hits the move he was going for earlier (his version of the Five Knuckle Shuffle, I guess).  He goes for the Trouble In Paradise, but Jericho locks in the Walls of Jericho.  Ric Flair’s music hits and he comes out to the stage.  Jericho breaks the hold and looks at Flair.  He turns around and Kofi hits the Trouble In Paradise for the victory at 7:47.  Good little match.  Kofi does well when he’s working with someone good, and Jericho is pretty fucking good.

They show Orton in “his house” again.  I still don’t care.  Tonight, Triple H vs. Legacy!  Commercial!

Todd Grisham interviews Jericho.  Jericho challenges Flair to a match next week.

Next Hall of Fame inductee is… Koko B. Ware!  He sure did hit a nice dropkick.  He’s going to be inducted by the Honky Tonk Man!

Rey Mysterio, Christian, & Finlay (w/ Hornswoggle) vs. Kane & World Tag Team Champions John Morrison & The Miz.  I bet Vince laughs his ass off at the marks who thought Christian was going to return to WWE and be a big star.  His big return to Raw is in a throwaway six-man match and from what I heard he didn’t get much of a reaction.  Christian and Miz start.  Kane tags in and massacres Christian, then Morrison takes his turn.  Christian makes the tag to Finlay, who cleans house.  He tags in Mysterio, who hits the Bombs Away on Miz, and an AVALANCHE FRANKENSTEINER on Morrison.  He covers, but Miz saves.  Mysterio sends Miz out of the ring and sets up Morrison for the 619.  Kane catches him and goes for a chokeslam, but he escapes.  Finlay and Christian take Kane out.  Mysterio hits the 619 and the West Coast Pop(!) on Morrison for the win at 3:53.  Damn, Mysterio’s been working his ass off lately.  They must have something good for him at Mania that nobody knows about yet.

Dibiase and Rhodes are headed to the ring!

Tomorrow on ECW, BATTLE ROYAL!

Next week, The Undertaker & Michaels vs. JBL & Vladimir Kozlov!

Plug for Cena’s movie.  I don’t care.

Dibiase and Rhodes come out of the main event.  Triple H doesn’t.  They do the big where Lillian announces him and they play his music twice, but still no HHH.  Dibiase and Rhodes are announced as winners by forfeit.  Orton babbles on the big screen.  The doorbell rings.  He sends “his wife” to answer it, then thinks better of it.  Triple H opens the door with his slegehammer and looks all over the house for him.  Orton finally emerges from the cupboard under the stairs and casts Expelliarmus on Triple H, sending the slegehammer flying.  Just kidding, he hits him with a golf club.  They brawl, then Triple H throws Orton out of a window and kicks the shit out of him.  The cops show up and arrest him.  Of couse, Orton attacks Triple H and the cops just pull him away instead of arresting him too.  Triple H goes to spend the night in lock up as we fade to black.

WWE Monday Night Raw 2/23/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open, then a replay of last week’s big closing angle, in which Randy Orton RKO’d Stephanie McMahon and incurred the wrath of her husband (that they’re finally acknowledging on TV), Triple H.

Justin Roberts (where’s Lillian?) introduces the ever annoying Smackdown GM, Vickie Guerrero.  She says that since there are no more McMahons, she’s now the GM of Raw too.  Fuck.  John Cena comes out.  I’ve never been so happy to see him.  Cena makes fun of Michael Cole, who’s at the commentary table with Jerry Lawler.  Cena says he’s going to cash in his rematch clause to get his title shot against Edge tonight.  World Heavyweight Champion Edge comes out with Big Show.  Cena tells Edge to stand up like a man and be a champion.  Edge blabs for a while, then Cena makes a funny comment.  Something like, “You’re only running your mouth because you’re standing here with that 400 pound beast, and you brought Big Show too.”  Show tells Cena to respect Vickie.  Cena speculates that Show is there to pick up Edge’s slack in the bedroom.  Vickie says Cena will either face her family or her friend tonight.  Cena says either is fine with him.  It’ll probably be some lame handicap match with Cena vs. Edge, Show, & Chavo.

Tonight, CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz in a triple threat Money In The Bank Qualifying match.

Legacy arrives at the building.  Why aren’t they at work on time like everyone else?

Tonight, JBL vs. Shawn Michaels with the winner facing Undertaker at WrestleMania.

Non-Title, Money In The Bank Qualifying Triple Threat Match: WWE Intercontinental Champion CM Punk vs. World Tag Team Champion John Morrison vs. World Tag Team Champion The Miz.  The briefcase is hanging above the ring, just for the hell of it.  Punk tries to pin Miz quickly with an inside cradle, but Morrison breaks it.  Miz and Morrison double team Punk.  Punk fights back and nails Miz with a kick that sends him off the apron.  A clothesline from Miz takes he and Punk both out of the ring.  Commercial.  Back from break, Morrison is stretching Punk in the ring.  During the break, Miz was taken out with a cross body off the steps from Punk and a friendly fire Shooting Star press off the apron from Morrison.  Punk fights back with kicks and knees.  Miz comes back in and nails Punk, then works him over.  Morrison is out from Punk’s corner knee kick.  Morrison comes back in and Punk takes them both down.  He hits a powerslam on Morrison, but Miz saves.  Miz gets Morrison up on his shoulders and Morrison hits a Doomsday Device-style Moonlight Drive.  Miz covers, but Morrison breaks it.  Morrison covers, but Punk kicks out.  Morrison and Miz fight with each other.  Punk grabs Morrison and uses his legs to knock Miz out of the ring, then hits the Go 2 Sleep for the pin on Morrison at 10:26.  Pretty good little match.  Straightedge to the bank two years in a row!

Last week on Smackdown, Jim Ross did a sit down interview with Triple H.  Next, they’ll replay it.

As promised, we get Triple H’s interview from Smackdown.  He says Orton crossed the line when he RKO’d Triple H’s wife.

Todd Grisham is outside Orton’s dressing room, hoping for an interview.  Dibiase and Rhodes come out.  Rhodes says the McMahons are responsible for what happened to them.  Dibiase says Orton will address his actions tonight, and if Triple H wants to get involved, they’ll be ready.

Santino, Beth, Rosa, and Dolph Ziggler are heading to the ring after the first good Santino segment in over a month at least.

WWE Rewind: Last week, Melina beat Beth Phoenix to retain the Women’s Championship when the face Divas came out to neutralize Santino and Rosa.

There are guys in the parking lot waiting for Triple H to show up.

Cryme Tyme & WWE Women’s Champion Melina vs. Santino Marella, Dolph Ziggler, & Beth Phoenix (w/ Rosa Mendez).  The ladies start.  Beth picks Melina up.  Melina fights back, then falls on her ass.  Tags to Ziggler and JTG.  They have a really nice exchange.  JTG does that facebuster that I always think is going to be a monkey flip.  Ziggler fights back and beats him down.  Santino wants in.  JTG gets in a shot and makes the hot tag to Shad, who kicks Ziggler’s ass.  Ziggler finally tags in Santino.  Santino pumps himself up, charges Shad, and promptly gets STO’d by Shad for the pin at 3:57.

Shawn Michaels vs. JBL is NEXT!

WrestleMania hype video.

Cena is backstage wondering who he’s facing tonight.  They play the trailer for his new movie.

JBL vs. Shawn Michaels.  They block up, then Shawn jumps on JBL and starts throwing punches.  The match goes back and forth for a while.  JBL knocks Michaels out of the ring.  He follows Shawn out and tries to throw him into the ring post, but Michaels reverses and sends JBL in head first.  They barely beat the count back into the ring.  Commercial.  Back from break, JBL goes for a superplex.  Michaels fights him off, but then takes a boot to the face and nasty bump to the floor.  Michaels makes it back in and kicks out of JBL’s clothesline.  I remember when that used to be a killer finish.  He ducks another attempt and does the elbow smash followed by the nip up, a pair of atomic drops, a body slam, and the diving elbow.  JBL avoids the superkick and misses the lariat.  Michaels does the Flair flip in the corner, then gets thrown over but skins the cat back in.  JBL gives him a boot and taunts him.  JBL goes for the lariat again, but Michaels catches him flush with the superkick for the win at 13:01.  Not bad.  Vladimir Kozlov comes down and stares down Shawn.  Apparently now he and Shawn will face each other next week, with the winner jobbing to Taker at Mania.  Michaels takes a swing at Kozlov and gets laid out with the spinebuster.  Crowd boos Kozlov big.

Legacy are suiting up in the back.  Commercial.

This week on Smackdown, the Hardy Boyz EXPLODE!

WrestleMania hype video: WrestleMania 24.

Jamie Noble is in the ring, saying he’ll last longer against his opponent tonight than he did last week.

Jamie Noble vs. Mike Knox.  Knox wins with his finish in 30 seconds according to my clock, 29 according to WWE’s.

2009 Hall of Fame Inductees: Steve Austin and Dory & Terry Funk.  New inductee: Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat!  I fully approve, as he’s one half of my favorite match ever.  He’ll be inducted by the other half of that match, Ric Flair!

Cole introduces Ricky Steamboat.  He says winning the Intercontinental Championship at WrestleMania III was the highlight of his career, and going into the Hall of Fame is the greatest highlight of his life.  That’s gotta be hyperbole.  Chris Jericho comes out as everyone expected.  Jericho’s happy Mickey Rourke didn’t win an Oscar.  Hey says Steamboat sold out when he came to WWE, bring up his cartoonish Dragon character from the early 90s.  He says Steamboat is the biggest hypocrite of them all.  Steamboat mentions signing an autograph 20 years ago for a young Jericho, who was a big fan of him.  Steamboat cuts a long promo on him, then Jericho cheap shots him and leaves him laying.

Earlier tonight… Vickie told Cena he’d face her friend or her family tonight.  It’s NEXT!

In the middle of a commercial, they show a long dark shot of the Raw arena for no reason.

Cole and Lawler explain that it was technical difficulties.  Grisham says Triple H still hasn’t arrived.

Cena comes out for his match.  Vickie says he doesn’t get a title shot tonight.  Cena says he’s going to follow Vickie around until she grants him his title shot.  Cena’s opponent is… Chavo Guerrero!

John Cena vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.  Cena wins in 46 seconds with the F-U and the STFU… er, the Attitude Adjustment and the STF.

Legacy is heading to the ring.  Orton has a sledgehammer.

Tomorrow night on ECW: Jack Swagger vs. Christian for the ECW Championship.

Next week, Michaels vs. Kozlov with the winner jobbing to Taker at WrestleMania.

Legacy comes out to the ring.  Orton cuts his promo, again blaming his explosive diarrhea for his actions.  WWE Champion Triple H finally arrives at the arena and comes out in full pissed off psycho mode, sledgehammer in hand.  Orton tries to reason with him, going as far as to drop his sledgehammer out of the ring.  Triple H reciprocates the gesture.  Triple H comes up with another sledgehammer, nails Rhodes, then chases Orton and Dibiase to the back, where they find lots of locked doors.  They barricade themselves in the locker room.  Triple H bashes down the door with the sledgehammer and corners them.  Dibiase ducks a swing that could have decapitated him, then gets nailed in the back with a safe shot.  Orton ducks a hammer throw and Triple H breaks the dressing room mirror.  I guess if he drops the belt at Mania, he can blame it on bad luck.  Orton and Dibiase make it to their car.  Triple H smashes a window, but they get away.  Fade to black.

Fun show overall.

WWE ECW 2/10/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open.  A couple of weeks ago, Hornswoggle stole Jack Swagger’s ECW Championship belt.  Swagger pushed Hornswoggle and got his ass kicked by Finlay.  Last week, Finlay had a hand from Hornswoggle in handing Swagger is first defeat.

Matt Striker and Todd Grisham welcome us LIVE to Fresno, California as Jack Swagger makes his way to the ring.  He has to defend the title against Finlay at No Way Out, but tonight he’s calling out Hornswoggle!  However, the music that plays is a remixed version of “Just Close Your Eyes.”  It’s the returning Christian, who makes his way to the ring with a nice (not huge, but nice) response from the crowd.  Captain Charisma makes fun of Swagger’s lisp, then issues a challenge to the winner of the Swagger/Finlay No Way Out title match.  Swagger says Christian is not a threat to him, so Christian nails him with the microphone.  Instant commercial.

Moments ago: Christian nailed Jack Swagger with a microphone!

Swagger complains to Teddy Long and says he’s taking the rest of the night off.  Long says no, Swagger has a match tonight with Christian!

Tommy Dreamer is in the ring.  Last week, Miz and Morrison made fun of him, then beat him up.

Tommy Dreamer vs. World Tag Team Champion The Miz (w/ John Morrison).  Dreamer throws a weak punch, then awkwardly takes him down.  Tommy goes to ringside and makes Miz take a bump into the guardrail, then throws him back in.  Miz takes over briefly, then Tommy hits a backdrop suplex.  Tommy has a flurry of offense and gets a near fall with a Sky High-type move.  Dreamer hits a neckbreaker off the ropes and covers, but Miz gets a foot on the ropes.  A distraction from Morrison allows Miz to hit the Reality Check (I think) for the win at 3:08.

Tonight: Christian vs. Jack Swagger!

WWE Slam of the Week: Last week, the Boogeman squashed Jamie Noble.  Noble bailed before he got the worm treatment

Teddy Long is chatting with Tiffany in his office when Noble comes in.  Long offers him a rematch with Boogeyman, but Noble doesn’t want that.  He wants better treatment since he’s a huge superstar.  There’s a knock on the door.  It’s Natalya and TJ Wilson, who is going by the name Tyson Kidd.  They put over that he was trained in the Dungeon by Bret Hart.  Sure he was.  Was he?

No Way Out: Shane McMahon vs. Randy Orton, Shawn Michaels vs. JBL, a couple of Elimination Chamber matches, and Finlay vs. Jack Swagger.

Christian is getting ready when Finlay and Hornswoggle come in.  Finlay welcomes Christian to ECW, but warns him that after No Way Out, he’s going to have to go through him if he wants the ECW Title.

WrestleMania is 54 days away!

Evan Bourne returns… when?

Tyson Kidd (w/ Natalya) vs. Bao Nguyen, whose name is way to difficult a name for a one shot jobber to have.  Bao goes a hammer lock to start, then Kidd kicks his ass.  Kidd nails a kick right to Bao’s face!  Kidd wins at 1:30 with a swank springboard elbow drop.  Jamie Noble appears at the top of the ramp to stare at Kidd and Natalya.  That should be a good one for next week.  Kidd was impressive.

Swagger vs. Christian is NEXT!

Raw Rebound: Orton talked, then wrestled Undertaker.  Legacy ran in and the three of them beat down Taker until Shane McMahon made the save.  Yes, Shane McMahon saved UNDERTAKER.

Non-Title: ECW Champion Jack Swagger vs. Christian.  Swagger out wrestles Christian to start, then Christian nails him.  Finlay and Hornswoggle comes down to join the announcers as we take an instant commercial break, during which Swagger took over and press slammed Christian out of the ring.  Back in the ring now, Swagger is beating up Christian.  Christian starts making a comeback when he hits a tornado DDT for a near fall.  He hits his reverse DDT and goes for either his frog splash or a headbutt, but misses.  Christian goes for the Unprettier, but Swagger counters and gets a near fall off of an Oklahoma roll, then a  belly-to-belly suplex.  They tease a German off the apron, but Swagger ends up being knocked off and into the announce table.  Swagger throws Christian over the table into Finlay and Hornswoggle.  Back in the ring, Swagger exposes the turnbuckle, but Christian gets him with an inside cradle for a near fall.  Hornswoggle provides a distraction, allowing Finlay to hit Swagger with the stick I can’t spell.  Christian takes advantage and hits the Unprettier for the win at 8:14+ commercials.  Pretty decent match.  It’s good to see Christian back in WWE and away from that circus in Orlando.

WWE Monday Night Raw 1/26/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open, then a video package of Orton’s attack on Mr. McMahon last week.

Lillian Garcia introduces the winner of the 2009 Royal Rumble, Randy Orton, who comes out with his Legacy cronies and three guys in suits.  Cole and Lawler welcome us LIVE from Cleveland, Ohio!  Orton blames his assault on Vince on a mental disorder.  The voices in his head made him do it!  Orton threatens to sue if he is fired.  He’ll also sue if they take away his WrestleMania title shot.  Orton says Dibiase and Rhodes will also walk if he is fired.  Orton then reads a prepared apology for Vince.

Stephanie McMahon is watching backstage.  She looks angry.  Commercial.

World Tag Team Championship Match: John Morrison & The Miz (c) vs. Cryme Tyme.  JTG takes the heat, then makes the hot tag to Shad.  Morrison goes the Moonlight Drive, but Shad hits his STO.  Miz breaks the cover.  Morrison hits the Moonlight Drive on Shad to retain the titles at 2:56.

No Way Out, with Elimination Chambers, next month!

JBL comes out and announces that tonight, Shawn Michaels will face John Cena, and if Michaels wins, JBL gets a spot in the Elimination Chamber!

Tonight: the world premier of Cena’s movie trailer!

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Kofi Kingston vs. Kane.  Kane beats up Kofi and sets up for the chokeslam, but Kofi hits a kick.  Kofi goes for the Trouble In Paradise.  Kane goozles him instead.  Kofi counters the chokeslam with a sunset flip for the pin at 2:04.  Kofi gets two PPV main events in a row!

Last week: Orton kicked Vince.  Later tonight: Cena vs. Michaels.

Chris Jericho comes out and introduces a trailer for The Wrestler.  Jericho says that Ric Flair has become friends with the star of the movie, Mickey Rourke.  Last night, Rourke said he’s coming to WrestleMania for Jericho!  Jericho says Rourke has offended him, and that’s a bad thing.

JBL and Michaels chat backstage.  Shawn vs. Cena is NEXT!

WrestleMania hype video emphasizing WrestleMania I.

Non-Title, Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match (for JBL): World Heavyweight Champion John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels (w/ JBL).  They slug it out to start.  Commercial.  Dammit.  Back from break, Cena reverses a figure-four leglock.  Cena hits a move for a near fall.  He then utilizes the deadly REAR CHIN LOCK!  They do more stuff.  Cena hits some shoulder tackles and his backdrop suplex thingy.  Cena goes to give Michaels the “You Can’t See Me,” but Michaels grabs his arm and pulls him down into the crossface.  Cena gets out and puts Michaels in the STFU.  Er, STF.  Forgot WWE is kid friendly now.  Cena goes for the victory, but Michaels counters and almost gets a near fall with a sunset flip.  Cena does a body slam, then sells his back.  He heads for the elbow drop, but JBL tells him to do the superkick.  Michaels ignores him and goes up anyway.  JBL gets on the apron.  Cena pushes JBL into Michaels, then goes for the victory and wins at 13:09.  A real disappointment, given the great matches they’ve had in the past.  Hell, they had a really good one like 2 weeks ago.  This one wasn’t.

Replay #7 Billion of the Vince/Orton angle from last week, then they show Orton’s statement from the beginning of the show.  Todd Grisham asks Stephanie McMahon if she is going to do anything about Orton tonight.  Stephanie says she’s going to do it publicly, to Orton’s face.

WWE Rewind: Still photos of Melina/Beth Phoenix at the Royal Rumble.

WWE Women’s Champion Melina & Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall (w/ Santino Marella).  I know I say this every week, but Melina as a babyface just doesn’t work for me.  Santino joins Cole and Lawler for commentary, which justifies this match being on TV.  Nothing interesting happens, then Rosa Mendez runs down and pulls Melina off the apron.  Phoenix hits the Dodon… er, Glam Slam on Kelly for the win at 2:37.

Another WrestleMania hype video, this one emphasizing WrestleMania 21.

Last Week: Rey Mysterio beat Mike Knox by DQ.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Rey Mysterio vs. William Regal (w/ Layla).  Rey hits the Bombs Away early.  Regal retaliates by kicking his ass.  Regal keeps cutting off Rey’s comebacks with various nasty shots and throws.  Rey finally hits the 619 and the top rope splash to win at 3:42.  Good little match.

NEXT: Cena’s movie trailer.

Rosa Mendez tells Santino how angry she is that Beth was robbed of the Women’s Title at the Royal Rumble.  Beth steps in and tells Santino they can keep her.

Cena’s movie trailer.  It looks unappealing.

Jericho vs. Punk in an Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match is NEXT!

Non-Title, Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: WWE Intercontinental Champion CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho.  Punk connects with some kicks, then Jericho works him over briefly.  Punk hits his usual moves.  He gets a two count off of the diving lariat.  Punk goes for the Go 2 Sleep, but Jericho counters with a sunset flip for a near fall.  Neat pinfall reversal sequence.  Punk counters the Walls of Jericho.  They do that Jacknife hold -> Bridge out -> backslide spot, then Jericho hits a botched Codebreaker for the win at 3:26.  Everybody just seems off tonight, even guys who usually work very well together (Cena/Michaels, Jericho/Punk).

Replay #7,000,000,001 of Orton punting Vince.  This one in SLOW-MO!

NEXT: Something with Stephanie and Orton.

Stephanie McMahon hits the ring.  She calls out Orton, who comes to the ring with his cronies and legal team.  Stephanie bitches down one of Orton’s lawyers.  Orton says if he’s fired, he’ll file an injunction to stop WrestleMania.  The roster comes out and stands on the stage.  Orton dares Stephanie to fire him so he can cancel WrestleMania and put the roster out of work.  Stephanie says that would be too easy.  She has bigger plans.  Shane McMahon’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring.  He looks that kind of angry where you’re so angry you want to cry.  He jumps on Orton and fights off Dibiase and Rhodes when they try to hold him.  He throws some incredibly weak looking shots at Rhodes as Dibiase tries to help Orton to the back.  Shane follows them up the ramp and jumps Orton again.  The wrestlers try to hold them back.  Shane decks Kofi and someone else and looks for Orton, but he’s escaped!

What a shitty show.