Archive for Sam Houston

WWF Survivor Series 1988

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 15, 2010 by Grappleholic

LIVE from the Richfield Coliseum in Richfield, Ohio!  Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura are the announcers.  I’m sure that means this is going to be a happening.  Howard Finkel is the ring announcer.

Elimination Match: WWF Intercontinental Champion The Ultimate Warrior, Brutus Beefcake, The Blue Blazer, Sam Houston, & Jim Brunzell vs. The Honky Tonk Man, Danny Davis, Greg Valentine, Ron Bass, & Bad News Brown (w/ Jimmy Hart).  Co-captains Warrior and Beefcake shake the ropes together.  Valentine and Beefcake start.  They trade blows.  Davis tags in and puts the boots to Beefcake.  Beefcake leap frogs him and locks in the sleeper to eliminate Davis in 1:18.  Valentine comes in and hammers Beefcake again.  Valentine goes for the figure-four, but Beefcake kicks him away.  Blazer tags in and does an awesome head scissors takeover.  Brunzell tags in and twists Valentine’s arm.  Brunzell lands a dropkick, but didn’t notice Bad News tag in.  Brown kicks Brunzell’s ass.  Brunzell tries to fight back, but it seems to just piss Bad News off.  Brown hits the Ghetto Blaster to pin Brunzell at 5:12.  Beefcake, followed quickly by Houston, go after Brown.  Brown kicks Houston in the face and hits a leg drop for 2.  Brown beats up Houston some more and tags in Valentine.  Valentine hammers him, then tags Brown back in.  Brown holds Houston for a shot, but Valentine accidentally nails Brown.  They argue.  The rest of the heel time tries to soothe things.  Bad News just leaves and gets counted out in about 7:50.  Houston gets a quick cradle on Valentine for 2.  Valentine blocks a sunset flip attempt, then tags in Bass.  Houston gets a reverse cradle for 2.  Bass boots him in the face, then hits a clothesline for 2.  Houston hits a rebound cross body for 2.  Bass knocks him down and drops an elbow for 2.  Houston fires back, tries a monkey flip, but gets powerslammed by Bass for the pin at 10:11.  Warrior comes in and runs wild on the remaining opponents.  Tag to Blazer.  Rocket launcher by Warrior and Blazer on Bass for 2.  Honky tags in and takes a cross body from The Blazer.  Blazer hits a monkey flip and a dropkick on Honky.  Tag to Valentine.  Awesome.  Blazer hits a gutwrench suplex and a knee drop for 2.  Blazer goes up top, but Honky pushes him off.  Blazer lands on his knees.  Valentine locks the figure-four on Blazer for the submission in 12:22.  Valentine attacks his former tag partner, Beefcake.  Bass tags in and beats up Beefcake.  Honky tags in and gets in on that, too.  Beefcake counters a Shake, Rattle, & Roll attempt.  Honky tags in Bass, who hot shots Beefcake into the ropes and covers, but Beefcake gets a foot on the ropes.  Tag to Honky, who comes off the top and gets caught with a shot to the middle.  Beefcake brawls with Honky, then hits an atomic drop and a clothesline.  Beefcake locks in the sleeper.  They both fall out of the ring.  Beefcake locks in the sleeper again.  They both get counted out in 15:42.  Valentine and Bass beat up Warrior.  Warrior rallies and drops them both with a double clothesline.  Warrior pins Bass with a double axe handle at 17:37.  Valentine meets the same fate in 17:50.  Very fun match.  It was a happening!

Tag Team Elimination Match: WWF Tag Team Champions Demolition (w/ Mr. Fuji), The Brain Busters (w/ Bobby Heenan), The Fabulous Rougeau Brothers (w/ Jimmy Hart), The Bolsheviks, & Los Conquistadors vs. The Powers of Pain, The Young Stallions, The Hart Foundation, The Rockers, & The British Bulldogs.  Davey Boy stats with one of the Conquistadors.  Jacques tags in and gets press slammed onto Raymond.  Shawn Michaels, in his PPV debut, gets beaten up by the Bolsheviks.  Jannetty tags in and The Rockers double team Zhukov.  Ax tags in and wails on Jannetty.  Arn Anderson beats up Jannetty, then gets backdropped and dropkicked.  Tully tags in and trades punches with Jannetty.  Jannetty hits an atomic drop, gets punched by the babyfaces, dropkicked, and tags in Jacques.  Jannetty avoids a cross body from Jacques and covers for 2.  Dynamite tags in and hits the snap suplex for 2.  Powers and Raymond tags in, but Davey Boy wasn’t done.  He comes in and gets 2 on Raymond off a Brisco roll.  Powers and Zhukov tag in.  Powers gets beaten up by the heels and tags in Bret Hart.  Hart pins Raymond with an inside cradle at 5:38.  Roma and Volkoff fight.  Sorry, these matches are hard to follow with so many guys and so much going on.  Smash hammers Neidhart, but gets caught with a clothesline.  Barbarian tags in and trades blows with Smash.  A Conquistador tags in and gets his head kicked off by Barbarian.  Warlord tags in and has his way with the Conquistador, then tags in Hart.  The Conquistador makes the tag to Smash.  Tag to Ax.  Demolition beats up Hart.  Tag to Blanchard.  This can’t be fun to read for you guys.  Every freakin’ sentence is “X tags Y” or some such.  The heels take turns beating up Michaels.  Anderson hits him with the spinebuster for 2.  Michaels makes the tag to Jannetty, who runs wild on the Conquistadors.  Volkoff tags in and Jannetty gets a 2 count on him.  Lots of quick tags.  I think we’ve established that, though.  Warlord press slams a Conquistador, who tags in Ax.  Ax and Warlord trade punches.  Smash tags in.  Barbarian tags in.  Tags everywhere!  Barbarian and Smash land some fierce blows on each other.  Barbarian press slams Blanchard into the ropes, then tags in Neidhart, who powerslams Blanchard for 2.  Dynamite tags in and drops Blanchard, then gets thrown out of the ring.  Anderson tags in, puts the boots to Dynamite, and tags a Conquistador.  Zhukov misses a knee drop on Dynamite.  Powers beats up Zhukov.  Powers hits a cross body on Zhukov, but Zhukov rolls through and gets the pin at 15:34.  Michaels hits a diving fist drop on Zhukov for 2.  Barbarian nails Zhukov with a shoulder black.  Blanchard tags in and tip toes over to tag in Volkoff.  Ax clobbers Barbarian with a flurry of fierce blows.  Volkoff comes back in.  Barbarian kicks his head off and tags in Michaels.  Michaels beats him up, then goes with Zhukov.  Jannetty tags in and pins Zhukov with a slingshot sunset flip at 18:20.  Jannetty almost pins one of the Conquistadors with a sunset flip.  The heels take turns beating up Jannetty.  Davey Boy tags in and backdrops a Conquistador, who tags in Blanchard.  Smith and Blanchard trade shots.  Blanchard is an awesome chickenshit heel.  Smash tags in and beats up Davey Boy.  Blanchard taunts the face team before going to the apron.  Conquistadors beat up Davey Boy.  Davey Boy makes the tag to Neidhart.  Harts double team the Conquistador.  Michaels hits a dropkick on the Conquistador.  Marty hits an elbow smash.  The Conquistador ends up in the wrong corner and gets beat up.  Dynamite treats him to a snap suplex and a diving knee drop for 2.  Dynamite hits a backbreaker for 2, then tags in Barbarian.  Barbarian beats the shit out of the Conquistador, who manages to tag out to Blanchard.  Blanchard plays chickenshit and gets the advantage with a cheap shot, then turns Barbarian over to Demolition.  The heel team takes turns beating up Barbarian.  Barbarian kicks the shit out of Arn and makes the tag to Jannetty.  Jannetty hits Arn with an elbow and tags in Neidhart.  Blanchard tags in and hits a cross body for 2.  Neidhart suplexes Blanchard and tags in Hart.  Hart hits a German suplex hold on Blanchard, but Blanchard gets a shoulder up and Hart gets pinned at 27:08.  Dynamite hits a Tombstone on Blanchard for 2.  Bulldogs double team Blanchard.  The Rockers brawl with the Busters and all four are DQ’d at about 29 minutes.  They keep brawling all the way backstage.  Smash beats up Dynamite.  Dynamite fights back.  More quick tags.  Powers of Pain beat up one of the Conquistadors.  Davey Boy hits the vertical suplex on the other Conquistador.  Davey gets a crucifix hold on Ax for 2.  Dynamite shines against Demolition.  Davey Boy press slams a Conquistador again and follows with the running powerslam.  Barbarian and Ax fight.  Smash throws Barbarian out of the ring.  The Conquistadors help beat up Barbarian.  Bulldogs beat up a Conquistador.  Dynamite hits the snap suplex on Smash and goes for the diving headbutt, but misses.  Smash hits Dynamite with a clothesline for the pin in 36:18.  Powers of Pain beat up a Conquistador.  Warlord spears the post.  Ax tags in and beats the shit out of the injured shoulder.  Fuji gets on the apron with his cane for no apparent reason as the heels beat up The Warlord.  He does it again a minute later.  Fuji low bridges Smash, his own man, out of the ring.  Smash gets counted out at 39:48.  Ax bitches at Fuji.  Fuji tells Ax he’s the boss, then whacks him with the cane.  Smash grabs Fuji and throws him to Ax, who slams Fuji at ringside.  The Powers of Pain go outside and help Mr. Fuji up and lead him to their corner.  Fuji trips one of the Conquistadors with the cane, allowing Barbarian to hit a headbutt for the pin in 42:25.  Powers of Pain celebrate with Mr. Fuji.  Demolition comes back out and brawls with the Powers of Pain.  Demolition kicks their asses and runs them off.  There’s your double turn that didn’t really make sense, and I don’t think it really got over.  The match was long and often a clusterfuck, but it was a lot of fun.

Sean Mooney interviews Bad News Brown.  He says his teammates were conspiring against him.  He wants a title shot.  Mooney asks why he deserves it.  Brown says it’s because he’s undefeated.

Mean Gene Okerlund interviews Mr. Fuji and the Powers of Pain.

Royal Rumble hype.

Gorilla and Jesse hype the matches still to come.

Mean Gene interviews Andre the Giant & Dino Bravo’s team.

Sean Mooney interviews the Mega Powers’ team.

This was all to kill time for intermission.

Elimination Match: Jake Roberts, “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan, Tito Santana, Ken Patera, & Scott Casey vs. Andre the Giant, Dino Bravo, Rick Rude, Mr. Perfect, & Harley Race (w/ Bobby Heenan & Frenchy Martin).  Rude and Patera start.  Nothing of note happens.  Bravo tags in and wrestles with Patera a bit.  Perfect tags in and Patera drags him into the corner and makes the tag to Roberts.  Roberts has his second, then tags in Santana, who has a nice exchange with Perfect.  Jake and Bravo brawl.  Scott Casey (who?) tags in and tries a monkey flip on Bravo, but gets countered.  Race tags in and works over Casey.  Rude tags in and works over Casey.  Perfect tags in and works over Casey.  Casey realizes he’s boned and tags in Santana, who stays in for about a second before tagging Patera, who stays in for about a second before tagging Duggan.  Duggan takes Perfect’s head off with a clothesline.  Duggan punches Perfect out of the ring, gets into a confrontation with Andre, then tags in Casey.  Casey tries to pick the bones of Perfect, but fails.  Perfect tags Rude, who beats up Casey.  Tito tags in and hits a forearm on Rude for 2.  Duggan tags in and fails at clotheslining Rude, slams him, and fails at elbow drops.  Patera tags in and works over Rude.  Rude manages to hit the Rude Awakening for the pin at 8:21.  Casey, who never learns, tags in and gets his ass kicked.  He manages to get a 2 count on Bravo with a backslide.  Bravo avoids a reverse cradle and hits a side suplex to pin Casey at 9:29.  Tito and Perfect go at it again.  Tito gets an inside cradle for 2.  Duggan tags in.  Perfect catches him with a kick and beats him up.  Duggan Hacksaws up, but gets caught by Andre on the apron.  Andre headbutts Duggan.  Rude tags in and beats up Duggan some more.  Duggan drops Rude with a clothesline.  Race and Tito tag in.  Bravo tags in soon after and Tito hits him with a cross body for 2.  Tito gets a Brisco roll for 2 on Bravo.  Race tags in and hits a piledriver on Tito for 2.  Tito hits the flying jalapeno to pin Race at 13:19.  Andre comes in and ravages Tito.  Tito tries to sunset flip Andre.  Is he retarded?  Andre squashes him for the pin at 14:44.  Duggan comes in and attacks Andre, who gets tied up in the ropes.  Jake comes in and beats up the tied up Andre.  That dick.  Andre gets lose and tags in Rude.  Rude beats up Roberts, then tags in Perfect,who also beats up Roberts.  Andre chokes Roberts behind the referee’s back.  Perfect slaps Jake.  Jake fights back.  Bravo tags in and cuts off Jake from making the tag.  Roberts hits a short range lariat and goes for the DDT, but Rude clotheslines him from the apron.  Rude tags in and beats up Jake.  My video goes wonky because of the ancient VHS source material.  Bravo hits a piledriver on Roberts.  Duggan gets the hot tag and runs wild on Bravo.  Duggan goes for the 3 point clothesline, but Martin trips him from the outside.  Bravo knocks Duggan out of the ring and slams Bravo on the floor.  Duggan hits Bravo with the 2×4 to get DQ’d at 21:24.  Roberts is screwed.  Roberts and Perfect lock up.  Roberts hits a clothesline.  Crowd chants “DDT!”  Roberts and Perfect trade punches.  Roberts hits the knee lift.  Perfect tags out to Bravo.  Bravo over powers Roberts with a knuckle lock.  Bravo avoids a DDT attempt, misses an elbow drop, and tags in Rude.  Roberts bails for a moment, then comes back in.  He tries to stay as close to his corner as he can.  He and Rude brawl.  Bravo decks Rude from the apron.  Rude hits a gutbuster.  Rude works over Roberts.  Rude hits a diving… punch, I guess, then does his gay stripper dance over Roberts.  Rude saunters over to make the tag.  Roberts grabs him and hits the DDT for the pin at 28:47.  Andre tags in and chokes the shit out of Roberts.  Andre gets DQ’d for the choking at 29:40.  Perfect pins Roberts to win it 30:03.  Perfect and Bravo survive.  Finkel, you fucking moron, it’s not the SOLE SURVIVOR if TWO GUYS SURVIVED.  No complaints about the match.  Roberts brings the snake out after the match and scares Andre.

Mean Gene interviews The Big Boss Man and Akeem’s team.

Elimination Match: The Big Boss Man, Akeem, Ted Dibiase, King Haku, & The Red Rooster (w/ Slick, Virgil, & Bobby Heenan) vs. WWF Champion Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth), Hulk Hogan, Koko B. Ware (w/ Frankie), Hillbilly Jim, & Hercules.  Savage and Dibiase start.  It’s good.  Dibiase nails Savage with a clothesline.  They reverse Irish whip attempts.  Savage hits a clothesline and tags in Hercules.  Dibiase bails and tags in Rooster.  Poor Terry Taylor.  Rooster goes for what looks like a Scorpion Death Lock of all things, but doesn’t get it.  Koko tags in and eats Rooster’s boot.  Akeem tags in for a second, then tags in Haku.  Haku slams Koko, but Koko avoids a leg drop and tags in Hercules.  Hercules hammers Haku.  Hogan tags in and beats up Haku.  Jim tags in and gets a 2 count after a double big boot.  Akeem tags in and hammers Jim, then quickly tags in Rooster.  Rooster fails at slamming Jim, who slams him instead.  Tag to Koko, who powerslams Rooster for 2.  Koko hits a missile dropkick for 2.  Hogan tags in and beats up Rooster.  Tag to Savage.  Hogan slams Rooster and Savage hits the diving elbow for the pin at 6:12.  Heenan bitches at Rooster.  Haku and Hogan trade blows.  Haku gets the better of it and puts a beating on Hogan.  Hogan reverses a whip into the corner and hits a clothesline, then a slam, then tags Hercules.  Hercules dances and hits an elbow drop for 2.  Herc grabs a headlock, but Haku hits a backdrop suplex and tags Haku.  Herc avoids an elbow and tags in Hillbilly Jim.  Big guy fight.  Akeem hits a clothesline and a big splash for the pin at 9:54.  Koko dropkicks Akeem from behind, gets his licks in, and tags Hogan, who quickly tags Savage.  Savage hits a diving double axe handle, tags Herc.  Herc beats up Akeem.  Nobody can take Akeem down.  Koko tags in.  He’s not gonna pull it off.  He dropkicks Akeem into the corner.  Akeem avoids a Stinger Splash and tags in Boss Man, who hits the sidewalk slam to pin Koko at 11:46.  Hogan comes in and squares off with Boss Man.  Hogan hits an atomic drop.  All of the babyfaces punch Boss Man.  Hogan clotheslines him in the corner.  Hogan hits a big boot, then slams Boss Man.  Boss Man hits a spinebuster, then tags out to Akeem.  Twin Towers double team Hogan.  Tag to Haku, who beats up Hogan some more.  Boss Man beats up Hogan some more.  Dibiase tags in and beats up Hogan too.  Who doesn’t want to beat up Hogan a little bit?  Dibiase lands a few fist drops and covers, but Hogan throws him off at 2.  Hogan hulks up, hits an atomic drop, then tags in Hercules.  Herc beats up Dibiase.  When Herc gets rolling, Virgil provides the distraction that lets Dibase schoolboy Herc for the pin at 16:36.  Savage schoolboys Dibiase for the pin at 16:59.  Haku hammers Savage.  Savage avoids a headbutt and fights back.  Tag to Hogan.  Hogan beats up Haku.  Haku lands a superkick and tags in Boss Man.  Boss Man clobbers Hogan.  Akeem tags in and does the same.  Haku tags in and suplexes Hogan for 2.  Haku slaps a nerve hold on Hogan.  Hogan revives.  Boss Man tags in and hits the sidewalk slam, and doesn’t cover because he’s an idiot.  Boss Man goes for a splash, but of course he crashes and burns.  Hot tag to Savage, who runs wild on everybody.  Slick trips Savage from the outside.  Slick grabs Elizabeth by the arm as Savage is being bear hugged by Boss Man.  Hogan saves Liz, but the Towers jump him in the aisle.  Boss Man handcuffs Hogan to the bottom rope.  Boss Man is counted out at around 23:30.  Since he already lost, be beats the shit out Hogan with the nightstick.  Savage tries to make a comeback on Haku, but Boss Man chokes him with the nightstick.  Akeem is DQ’d at around 25:10.  The Towers leave.  Haku beats up Savage.  Slick taunts Hogan with the keys to the handcuffs.  Slick holds Savage for Haku.  Savage ducks and Slick gets superkicked off the apron.  Hogan nails Heenan.  Liz takes the keys from Slick and unlocks Hogan.  Haku hits a diving splash on Savage for 2.  Hogan gets the hot tag, punches Haku.  Big boot, body slam, and the leg drop for the pin in 29:11.  The Mega Powers survive.  Dammit Howard, THEY’RE NOT SOLE SURVIVORS IF THERE’S TWO OF THEM, YOU FUCKING FUCK.  Like the last match, no complaints, it was just really long.  Hogan and Savage pose to close the show.  I’m not sure if this is relevant to the storyline or not, but I noticed a couple of things about the Mega Powers.  1.) The rest of the team came out together to Savage’s music, but Hogan had to have his own entrance.  2.) Savage wore his Mega Powers trunks on.  Hogan didn’t.

Four very long matches, but it was a fun show.

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WWF WrestleMania IV

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 13, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open.

“The World Wrestling Federation: What The World Is Watching!”  WrestleMania IV!  We are LIVE from the Trump Plaza Hotel & Casino in Atlantic City, New Jersey!

Mean Gene Okerlund welcomes us to WrestleMania IV!  He introduces Gladys Knight to sing “America The Beautiful.”

The referees carry a huge ass trophy to the ring.  It will be presented to the winner of the Battle Royal.

Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura are the announcers.  They talk about what’s on tap for tonight.  Bob Uecker is back, too.

Battle Royal featuring The Hart Foundation of Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart, The Young Stallions of Paul Roma & Jim Powers, Sika, Danny Davis, The Killer Bees of Brian Blair & Jim Brunzell, Bad News Brown, Sam Houston, The Rougeau Brothers of Jacques & Raymond, Ken Patera, Ron Bass, Junkyard Dog, The Bolsheviks of Nikolai Volkoff & Boris Zhukov, Hillbilly Jim, King Harley Race, and George “The Animal” Steele.  Everybody brawls, except Steele, who is just wandering around at ringside.  Sam Houston gets eliminated, followed quickly by Sika.  Volkoff almost eliminates Brunzell, the one of the Rougeaus almost does too.  Steele keeps fucking with Neidhart, and pulls him out of the ring over the top to eliminate him.  Brunzell got eliminated somewhere in there.  Raymond Rougeau and Brian Blair get eliminated in the same motion.  JYD eliminates Bass.  Zhukov and/or Hart eliminate Hillbilly Jim.  Roma eliminates Davis.  Somebody eliminates Jim Powers.  Race and JYD trade headbutts.  Volkoff, Patera, and Zhukov get eliminated in short order.  Jacques gets eliminated.  JYD eliminates Race.  Brown eliminates Roma.  Hart holds JYD for Brown, but JYD ducks and Hart gets hit.  JYD does his headbutts on the ground.  Hart and Brown double team JYD, then talk strategy.  JYD fights them both, but he’s overcome by superior numbers.  Hart and Brown bundle JYD out.  They act like they’re going to split the win, then Brown drops Hart with a kick, kicks his ass, then throws him out to win it in 9:47.  Hart, pissed that Brown double crossed him, dropkicks him out of the ring and smashes the trophy.

Howard Finkel explains tonight’s tournament for the vacant WWF Championship.  He introduces Robin Leach from Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous to read a scroll about it.

WWF Championship Tournament – Round 1: “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan vs. Ted Dibiase (w/ Andre the Giant & Virgil).  They lock up.  Dibiase backs Duggan into the corner and breaks clean.  Repeat, but this time Dibiase tries a cheap shot and Duggan cuts him off.  They trade punches.  Duggan hits an atomic drop and sends Dibiase out of the ring in a hilarious bump.  Dibiase goes on the offensive until Duggan drops him with a clothesline.  Duggan punches Dibiase in the corner, then runs into Dibiase’s boot in the opposite corner.  Dibiase goes to work.  Duggan fights back, but Dibiase rakes his eyes.  Duggan gets a sunset flip for 2.  Dibiase catches Duggan with a knee to the middle, then a fist drop.  Dibiase goes for a suplex, but Duggan reverses it.  Dibiase comes off the middle rope and gets caught with a shot to the gut.  Duggan gets rolling and goes for the three point clothesline, but Andre grabs his leg.  Dibiase hits him from behind, then finishes him with a fist drop in 5:03.  It was a fun little match.

Mean Gene interviews Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake.  Gene admires his “package.”

WWE Championship Tournament – Round 1: Dino Bravo (w/ Frenchy Martin) vs. “The Rock” Don Muraco (w/ “Superstar” Billy Graham).  They lock up, break, lock up again.  Bravo shoves Muraco into the corner and wails on him.  Muraco comes back and hits a half assed Vader Bomb into an elbow drop.  Bravo hits a couple of elbow drops, then a gutwrench suplex.  Muraco fights back and works on Bravo’s leg some.  Muraco works a spinning toe hold.  Bravo kicks Muraco away and Muraco gets hung in the ropes.  Bravo hits a piledriver, takes too long to cover, and only gets 2.  Bravo goes for another one, but Muraco backdrops him.  Double clothesline spot.  Muraco makes a comeback, but accidentally kills the ref in the process.  Bravo hits his side suplex and covers.  The referee taps him on the back three times, so Bravo thinks he won.  The ref was calling for the DQ.  Muraco wins by DQ in 4:54 because Bravo pulled the referee in front of him.  This match was lame and had a lame finish to boot.

Bob Uecker talks about Vanna White, who is around somewhere, then talks to The Honky Tonk Man and Jimmy Hart.  Honky will be putting the Intercontinental Title against Brutus Beefcake tonight.

WWF Championship Tournament – Round 1: Greg Valentine (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat (w/ baby Richie Steamboat).  Steamboat carrying his son to the ring will be something they show when Richie debuts on WWE TV in the future, I’m sure.  They lock up, break, repeat.  Lock up again and do some awesome stuff.  Man, Steamboat has the most glorious arm drags ever.  Steamboat moves fast.  Valentine throws him over the top, but Steamboat skins the cat back in, dropkicks him, then fails at a crucifix.  Valentine beats up Steamboat.  Valentine goes for a backdrop suplex, but Steamboat lands his feet and rams Valentine into the turnbuckles.  Steamboat works on Valentine’s arm.  Valentine hits an inverted atomic drop and a clothesline, then elbows Steamboat in the head.  They show Donald Trump in the front row.  Steamboat goes for a body slam, but Valentine lands on top for 2.  Valentine hits a gut buster, then goes for the figure-four.  Steamboat kicks him into the turnbuckle.  They trade chops.  Valentine finally falls down.  Valentine hits a shoulder breaker for 2.  Valentine goes for the figure-four again, but Steamboat cuts him off, then rams his head into the mat.  Steamboat hits a diving chop, and Valentine takes a great delayed bump.  Cover only gets 2.  Steamboat rams Valentine’s head repeatedly into the turnbuckles, argues with the referee, then goes up top.  Steamboat hits a diving cross body, but Valentine rolls through and gets the pin in 9:11.  Good match.

Mean Gene interviews Koko B. Ware and The British Bulldogs, who have Matilda back after The Islanders and Bobby Heenan kidnapped her.  They say Matilda has been trained to go after weasels.  Heh.

WWF Championship Tournament – Round 1: “The Natural” Butch Reed (w/ Slick) vs. “Macho Man” Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth).  Nothing happens, then they do a little bit.  Reed slow beats up Savage.  Savage fights back, but Reed reverses his suplex attempt.  Reed hits an elbow drop for 2.  Reed ponderously beats up Savage some more.  Reed hits Savage with a clothesline, talks at Elizabeth, then goes up top.  He spent too long fucking around.  Savage throws him off the top, then hits the diving elbow for the pin in 4:08.  It was fine when Savage was on offense, but unfortunately that was maybe 30 seconds of the match.

Uecker is backstage, still talking about Vanna White.  He talks to Bobby Heenan, with the Islanders.

WWF Championship Tournament – Round 1: The One Man Gang (w/ Slick) vs. Bam Bam Bigelow (w/ Oliver Humperdink).  Gang jumps Bigelow and lumbers around, beating him up.  Bigelow hits a cartwheel splash for 2, then a cross body for 2.  Bigelow keeps rolling.  Bigelow hits a headbutt, then Slick low bridges him out of the ring.  Bigelow makes it to the apron, but that really ugly ref counts him out at 3:00.  Stupid.

Mean Gene interviews Hulk Hogan.  His promo turns very wacky.  “Thank God Donald Trump’s a Hulkamaniac!”  Something about the Trump Plaza falling into the ocean.  I don’t know.

Another shot of Trump in the front row.  They show Slick screwing Bigelow again.

WWF Championship Tournament – Round 1: Rick Rude (w/ Bobby Heenan) vs. Jake Roberts.  Rude cuts a promo, saying what’s under his robe is why “the odds are in [his] favorite.”  They lock up as Damien wriggles around in the bag.  Roberts rams Rude’s face into the mat.  Rude slams Roberts, then hammers him.  Repeat.  Roberts slams Rude a couple of times.  Rude ends up the corner with Damien and freaks out.  Roberts cranks on Rude’s arm.  Rude punches Roberts, but Roberts holds onto the wrist lock and grounds him.  Roberts his a knee off the middle rope and goes for the DDT, but Rude bails.  Heenan hugs him.  Back inside, Roberts works on Rude’s arm some more.  The run the ropes.  Roberts slams Rude again and goes for the knee lift, but Rude avoids it and puts the boots to him.  Rude hits a clothesline, swivels his hips, and hits an elbow drop for 2.  Rude works a chin lock.  Heenan distracts the referee to give Rude the chance to choke Roberts.  Roberts finally works his way out of it.  Rude hits a diving chop, then swivels his hips some more.  Rude hits a clothesline for 2.  Rude goes back to the chin lock.  Rude flapjacks Roberts and goes up top to hit a diving punch for 2, covers for another 2, then goes back to the chin lock.  Roberts backdrop suplexes him, but Rude keeps his old on, then covers for 2.  Rude stomps Roberts in the ropes.  I think I hear a “BORING!” chant developing.  Rude works the chin lock again.  This is boring.  Roberts finally breaks out with a jawbreaker, then makes his comeback.  Roberts hits a short range clothesline and goes for the DDT, but Rude runs him into the corner.  Roberts catches a charging Rude with a knee, then hits a gutbuster for 2.  Rude hits a backdrop suplex for 2.  Double clothesline spot.  Rude gets a 1 count.  Rude goes for the Flair pin in the corner, but the bell rings after 2.  It’s a 15:00 draw at 15:14.  Roberts runs Rude and Heenan off with Damien.  The match was good in the beginning and the end.  The middle part where they were just stalling for time was boring.

Mean Gene and Vanna White are at the big fancy tournament bracket.  Vanna gives her predictions for the second round.

Hercules (w/ Bobby Heenan) vs. The Ultimate Warrior.  Hercules tries a shoulder block, to no effect.  Repeat.  They stare at each other, then shove each other.  They lock up and lumber around.  Warrior backs Hercules into the corner.  The ref makes them break and Herc gets a cheap shot in.  They brawl.  It’s bad.  Hercules backdrops Warrior out of the ring.  Warrior pulls Herc out and they brawl on the floor.  Back inside, more horrible brawling.  Warrior punches Herc in the corner.  Herc brings him out with an inverted atomic drop.  Herc avoids Warrior in the corner and locks in the full nelson.  Warrior kicks off the turnbuckles, then lifts his shoulder and gets the pin in 4:37.  Herc attacks Warrior after the match, then chokes him with his chain.  Warrior gets the chain and swings it around to run Herc off.  This sucked.  All of it.

Gorilla and Jesse talk, then we get an Andre/Hogan history package.

WWF Championship Tournament – Quarterfinal: Andre the Giant (w/ Ted Dibiase & Virgil) vs. Hulk Hogan.  Andre immediately goes on the attack.  He clobbers Hogan with huge blows.  Hogan fights back with forearms, then chokes DIbiase when he gets on the apron.  Hogan knocks Andre and Dibiase’s heads together.  Hogan chops Andre.  Andre gets tangled up in the ropes.  Hogan rips his shirt off and poses as Virgil and Dibiase free Andre.  Stupid Hogan.  Hogan knocks Andre down and hits 3 elbow drops for 2.  Andre chokes Hogan.  Andre chops Hogan, then clamps on a nerve hold.  Hogan fights back, then signals for the slam.  Virgil distracts the ref while Dibiase sneaks in and hits Hogan with a chair.  Hogan hits Andre with the chair IN FULL VIEW of the referee, who does NOTHING.  Andre hits Hogan with the chair, and the ref calls for the double DQ in 5:22.  This actively sucked.  Hogan chases Dibiase up the aisle.  Dibiase throws Virgil to Hogan.  Hogan suplex Virgil in the aisle.  Hogan comes back to the ring and body slams Andre.  Hogan does his posing routine.

Mean Gene interviews Randy Savage and Elizabeth.

WWF Championship Tournament – Quarterfinal: “The Rock” Don Muraco (w/ “Superstar” Billy Graham) vs. Ted Dibiase.  Dibiase doesn’t want to get in the ring.  Muraco brings him in the hard way.  Muraco hits a powerslam for 2.  Muraco hits a diving fist or chop for 2.  Muraco hits the Throwback, and generally continues beating up Dibiase.  Dibiase finally manages to defensively slingshot Muraco into the turnbuckles, then puts the boots to him.  Dibiase gets the heat on Muraco.  Except this crowd isn’t heated AT ALL.  Muraco avoids a falling elbow drop from the middle rope and makes his comeback.  Dibiase hot shots Muraco into the top rope for the pin in 5:36.  Fine little match.

Bob Uecker talks to Demolition (w/ Mr. Fuji).

The One Man Gang and Slick are in the ring for Finkel’s announcement that Gang receives a BYE in this round because of the draw between Rude and Roberts.

WWF Championship Tournament – Quarterfinal: Greg Valentine (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. “Macho Man” Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth).  They lock up.  Valentine hammers Savage.  Savage fights back and hits a knee drop for 2.  Valentine beats up Savage some more.  Elbow drop gets 2.  Valentine hits a shoulder breaker for 2.  Valentine throws Savage out of the ring, then hits him with an elbow to the back of the head from the apron.  Valentine hits Savage with some chops.  Valentine continues to beat up Savage.  He goes for the figure-four, but Savage holds into the ropes.  Valentine hits a suplex for 2.  Savage starts fighting back and actually gets a small reaction from the crowd.  Savage slams Valentine, then hits a diving double axe handle.  Hart jumps on the apron to stop the count.  Savage lunges for him.  Valentine gets the offensive on Savage again, but Savage reverses a suplex attempt, then goes up and goes for another axe handle.  Valentine catches him with a blow to the middle.  Hart helps Valentine avoids a charging Savage in the ropes.  Valentine goes for the figure-four, but Savage turns it into an inside cradle for the pin in 6:07.  Good little match.

Mean Gene and Vanna White go over the brackets at the end of the second round.  Vanna still doesn’t know who Uecker is.

WWF Intercontinental Championship Match: The Honky Tonk Man (c) (w/ Jimmy Hart & Peggy Sue) vs. Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake.  They lock up.  Beefcake catches Honky’s foot, teases a punch, then hits an atomic drop.  Beefcake messes up Honky’s hair, so Honky bails.  Beefcake rams Honky’s head into the turnbuckles repeatedly.  He keeps doing a scissors motion with his fingers, I guess because he wants to cut Honky’s hair.  Beefcake hits a high knee and Honky bails again.  Beefcake pulls him back in and beats him up.  Honky avoids an elbow drop and puts the boots to Brutus.  Honky beats up Brutus.  Hart chokes Beefcake behind the referee’s back.  Honky grabs a front face lock, but decides to beat him up some more instead of going for his move.  Then he actually goes for the Shake, Rattle, & Roll, but Beefcake holds onto the ropes to avoid it and makes his comeback.  Beefcake locks in the sleeper hold.  Jimmy gets on the apron and nails the referee with the megaphone.  Beefcake puts Honky to sleep and thinks he won, then notices the referee is also sleeping.  Beefcake goes for his bag of barber equipment, but Hart gets it and tries to escape under the ring.  Beefcake drags him out and cuts some of Hart’s hair off.  Peggy Sue tries to wake Honky while some more referees try to wake the original referee.  Peggy throws water on Honky to wake him up.  Beefcake comes in with his shears, but referees hold him back.  Beefcake is announces as the winner by DQ in about 9 minutes (no bell).  Fun match.

Bob Uecker talks to Andre the Giant, then gets choked by Andre’s massive hands.

The Islanders & Bobby Heenan vs. The British Bulldogs (w/ Matilda) & Koko B. Ware (w/ Frankie).  Second missed bell in a row.  Is the time keeper in the toilet or something?  Dynamite schools Tama to start.  Davey Boy and Haku tag in.  Davey Boy hits a cross body for 2, then a body slam for 2.  Davey Boy gets a crucifix hold for 2.  Tama tags in and gets press slammed.  Haku tags in and beats up Smith.  Koko tags in and dropkicks Haku, then does an awesome headlock/leg scissors to the Islanders.  Haku beats up Dynamite, who tags in Heenan, wearing his silly dog proof suit.  Heenan puts the boots to Dynamite.  As soon as Dynamite responds, Heenan tags in Tama.  Tama slams Dynamite and goes for a Vader Bomb, but Dynamite gets his knees up.  Koko tags in and runs wild on the Islanders.  The Islanders get some heat on Koko, then tag in Heenan to get his licks in again.  Whatever letters are on the back of Koko’s tights are blurred out.  I think it’s “WWF.”  Koko whips Heenan into the turnbuckles, then dropkicks him.  The Islanders jump Koko and a clusterfuck ensues.  The Islanders slam Heenan on top of Koko for the pin in about 7 minutes.  Good little match.  Dynamite headbutts the Islanders, which is always a stupid move.  Davey Boy sicks Matilda on Heenan afterwards.

Finkel introduces Jesse Ventura.  It must have been in Jesse’s contract that he gets to pose at every WrestleMania.

Ted Dibiase is in the ring for Finkel’s announcement that he gets a BYE in the semifinals.  Why do they feel the need to bring the guys out for these announcements?

WWF Championship Tournament – Semifinal: The One Man Gang (w/ Slick) vs. “Macho Man” Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth).  They lock up, with Gang overpowering Savage.  Savage grabs Gang by the beard and “clotheslines” him across the top rope.  Gang beats up Savage.  Gang gets a couple of 2 counts.  Gang slams Savage and goes for the splash, but Savage moves, avoids Gang in the corner, and makes a comeback.  Savage knocks Gang out of the ring and hits a diving axe handle to the outside.  Slick helps Gang get back in the ring.  Savage tries to slam Gang, fails, and gets choked.  Slick aggravates Elizabeth.  Savage chokes Slick.  Gang attacks Savage with Slick’s cane to cause the DQ in 4:12.  This was bad.  After the match, Savage hits a diving axe handle that causes Gang to squash Slick.

Flip over disc to continue!  I shall!

Mean Gene and Vanna White and the brackets board again.  Vanna leaves to go to ringside.  Bob Uecker shows up just after she left.

WWF Tag Team Championship Match: Strike Force (c) vs. Demolition (w/ Mr. Fuji).  Smash smashes Martel.  My wit amuses me.  Tito comes in to dropkick Martel onto Smash.  Brief clusterfuck ensues.  Strike Force try to work over Smash’s arm.  Ax tags in and promptly gets arm dragged by Tito.  Strike Force tries their arm working strategy on Ax.  Smash tags in and gets his arm punished too.  Smash elevates Tito and Ax nails him.  Demolition gets the heat on Santana.  Martel gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Martel locks Smash in the Boston crab.  Santana stops Ax from interfering.  Mr. Fuji gets on the apron with his cane.  Tito chokes him.  Ax hits Martel with Fuji’s cane behind the referee’s back.  Smash pins Martel to win the titles in 8:02.  Fine match.

Finkel introduces the celebrities for the main event: Robin Leach, who will present the championship belt to the winner and guest ring announcer Bob Uecker, who introduces guest timekeeper Vanna White.

WWF Championship Tournament – Final: Ted Dibiase (w/ Andre the Giant) vs. “Macho Man” Randy Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth).  They lock up.  Crowd is dead.  Andre trips Savage behind the referee’s back.  They trade hammerlocks.  Savage hits a shoulder block, then Andre trips him again.  Dibiase works over Savage.  Savage blocks a sunset flip attempt and hits a clothesline for 2.  Dibiase beats up Savage some more.  Savage rallies.  The crowd pops a little bit when he hits a move.  Savage knocks Dibiase out of the ring and goes to the top, but Andre stands over Dibiase to protect him.  Savage confers with Elizabeth, who leaves.  Dibiase attacks Savage from behind and gives him a bunch of fist drops for 2.  Elizabeth comes back out with Hulk Hogan in tow.  Dibiase works a rear chin lock.  He lets go when he sees Hogan.  Hogan gets a chair and sits down in Macho’s corner.  Dibiase continues to beat on Savage.  Andre grabs Savage again and Hogan nails Andre.  Savage tries to fight back against Dibiase, but can’t get rolling.  Dibiase hits a suplex for 2.  Dibiase hits a gutwrench suplex for 2.  Dibiase goes up top, but Savage throws him off, then goes for the diving elbow drop, but Dibiase moves out of his way.  Dibiase locks in the Million Dollar Dream.  Andre distracts the referee.  Hogan sneaks in and hits Dibiase with the chair.  Savage hits the diving elbow drop for the pin in 9:18.  Okay match, but I’m sure they had a lot of matches that were way better than this.  This was mostly storyline, which is fine, I guess.  Savage, Liz, and Hogan celebrate.

Fun show.  This was one of the few old school tapes that one of my local video stores had when I first became a fan, so it’s a sentimental favorite of mine.

WWF Royal Rumble 1988

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 10, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open, since this is the Anthology version.  We’re LIVE from Hamilton, Ontario!  Vince McMahon runs down the card for tonight.  Vince and Jesse Ventura are our hosts.  Howard Finkel is the ring announcer.

Rick Rude vs. Ricky Steamboat.  They lock up.  Rude throws punches.  Steamboat responds with chops.  Rude sends Steamboat over the top rope.  Steamboat skins the cat back in, then backdrops Rude out of the ring.  Rude wants a test of strength.  Steamboat obliges and is overpowered, but takes Rude over into an ARMBAR!  Rude escapes it.  Steamboat hits one of his gorgeous arm drags and gets him back in the armbar.  A fan in the front row has a megaphone, and is really annoying.  Rude finally manages to escape, but immediately gets taken back over.  Wow, armbar, that’s refreshing.  Rude’s tired of it too, and beats up Steamboat.  Steamboat goes BACK TO THE FUCKING ARMBAR.  Fuck, Steamer, I LOVE your arm drags, but you don’t have to follow each of them with a 3 minute armbar.  Rude elbows Steamboat in the eye, so he’s as annoyed as I am.  Rude catches Steamboat with a knee to the middle and Steamboat falls out of the ring.  Rude follows him outside and slams him, working over Steamboat’s back.  Rude gets back in the ring and goes his gay hip swiveling.  Steamboat makes it to the apron and Rude suplexes him into the ring for 2.  Rude applies a camel clutch for a while.  Steamboat finally manages to fight out and hit an electric chair drop.  Steamboat goes for a splash, but Rude gets his knees up.  Rude hits an atomic drop that looks botched.  Rude goes back to the camel clutch.  Joy.  Steamboat fights out and launches Rude into the turnbuckles, then rams his head into the top turnbuckle.  They do some wrestling, including the bridge up —> backslide spot I love.  Steamboat gets some quick pinning combinations, including reversing an inside cradle by Rude.  Rude hits a clothesline for 2.  Steamboat counters a suplex attempt into one of his own.  Steamboat comes off the top, but Rude pulls the referee in front of him to take the blow.  Rude locks in a Canadian backbreaker.  The referee wakes up and calls for the bell at 17:40.  Rude leaves, thinking he won, but Finkel announces that Steamboat wins by DQ.  Rude comes back to argue with the referee.  I didn’t enjoy this.  The opening match should be exciting, and this… wasn’t.  Insta-commercials.

Mean Gene Okerlund and Jesse Ventura are out for the weight lifting thing.  Dino Bravo comes out along with manager, Frenchy Martin.  He’s going to attempt to set the world bench press record.  They talk.  Bravo bench presses 415 lbs. as a warm up.  He lifts 505 lbs. next.  This is boring.  Bravo lifts 555 lbs.  I still don’t care.  Bravo lifts 595 lbs. after stalling forever.  655.  Please end.  Next is 715, 10 lbs. more than the world record.  Bravo starts to leave, then comes back.  Jesse helps him lift the weight.  This segment was fucking painful.

2/3 Falls Match for the WWF Women’s Tag Team Championship: The Glamour Girls (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. The Jumping Bomb Angels.  Ah, the two teams whose members I can’t tell apart.  Angels hit the Glamour Girls with a double dropkick.  Kai works over the angel in pink.  Martin tags in and beats her up too.  Pink bridges out of a cover.  The Angel in red tags in and hits a weird suplex for 1.  Pink tags in.  Jesse asks Vince what the Angels’ names are.  Vince replies that he doesn’t speak Japanese.  Leilani Kai tags in.  Red runs wild on her.  The Angels put the Glamour Girls in stereo figure-four leglocks.  The referee makes the illegal ladies leave the ring.  Red works the leg of Kai.  Pink tags in and works the leg too.  Martin tries to save her, but fails.  Red works the leg as Kai struggles to try to make the tag.  She finally gets the tag.  Martin pulls Red nastily off the turnbuckles.  Red runs the ropes, but Kai catches her with a knee from the apron.  Martin hits an alley oop on the Angel in red to win the first fall in 6:11.  Insta-commercials.  Martin continues working over Red.  Pink tags in and runs wild.  I really wish I knew which one was which.  They do a do si do spot that ends with the Glams clotheslining each other.  Red pins Kai(?) with a botched sunset flip to win fall 2 (8:20 shown).  Replay, insta-commercials.  Angels work over one of the Glams.  Martin tags in and red (Itsuki?) hits something on her that I already forget.  Pink tags in and wrestles with… Martin?  Yes, Martin.  Kai tags in and works over Tateno (I think pink is Tateno and red is Itsuki).  Stuff happens.  Sorry.  Itsuki plants Kai with a weird drop for 2.  Martin and Tateno tag in.  Tateno hits a diving knee drop for 2.  Itsuki tags in and hits a cross body for 2.  Itsuki misses a diving senton.  Noriyo Tateno (or Noreno, as Vince calls her) tags in.  Double missile dropkick to Martin (I think).  Tateno gets the pin (15:21 shown).  Sorry for the clusterfuck review and the lousy timing.  The Angels happily celebrate.  I love these girls.

They show a clip of the Hogan/Andre match from WrestleMania III where Andre almost got the 3 count.  Vince and Jesse talk about it.  Clips of the deal with Ted Dibiase trying to buy the WWF Championship from Hulk Hogan.  Vince and Jesse talk about that.  They show Andre attacking Hogan and choking him out on Saturday Night’s Main Event.  More talking.  They show Andre agreeing to win the title for Dibiase.  Insta-commercials.

Mean Gene Okerlund and WWF President Jack Tunney are in the ring for the contract signing for the Hogan/Andre rematch.  Andre the Giant is in the ring, along with Ted Dibiase and Virgil.  Okerlund introduces the WWF Champion, Hulk Hogan.  Tunney lays out the contract.  Andre doesn’t want to sit down.  He finally sits down.  Dibiase bitches at Hogan about not taking the money.  Hogan signs the contract.  Andre takes his sweet time, examining the contract.  Dibiase tells Okerlund off.  Andre finally signs.  Dibiase tells Andre to put his “stamp of approval” on it.  Hogan lunches at Dibiase.  Andre rams Hogan’s face into the table.  Andre leaves.  This went on too long.

Jesse and Vince explain how the Royal Rumble Match works.  I should mention that this Rumble only has 20 participants.

Finkel does the ring announcing for the first 2 guys, who are already in the ring.  He does the usual explanation of the rules.  Oh, they only specify that you have to be thrown over the top rope.  It doesn’t matter where your feet hit or how many feet hit yet.

Royal Rumble Match: #1 is Bret Hart (w/ Jimmy Hart).  #2 is WWF Tag Team Champion Tito Santana.  They lock up.  Bret beats up Tito.  Tito counters Bret and hammers him in kind.  Bret gets back on the advantage and works over Tito some more and tries to get him out.  #3 is Butch Reed.  Reed beats up Santana and tries to eliminate him.  Tito fights back and knocks Reed and Hart’s heads together.  Santana stomps on Reed’s head.  Hart attacks Tito again.  Hart holds Tito for Reed to come off the middle rope with a double axe handle.  #4 is Jim Neidhart.  Poor Tito.  Tito gets triple teamed by the heels.  They all try to get him over the top.  #5 is Jake “The Snake” Roberts, who immediately eliminates Reed, then runs wild on the Hart Foundation.  Tito get his second wind and helps.  They whip the Harts into each other.  Roberts goes for the DDT on Bret, but Neidhart clotheslines him.  Bret piledrives Tito.  #6 is King Harley Race.  Race helps Neidhart beats up Roberts.  The Hart Foundation double team Tito some more.  Roberts decks Bret, then gets cut off by Race.  #7 is Jim Brunzell.  Brunzell and Tito try to eliminate Bret.  It turns into a struggle involving everyone, but heels save Bret from being eliminated.  Everybody fights.  #8 is Sam Houston, who runs wild on Neidhart.  Santana kicks the shit out of Bret’s head.  Houston beats up Race as Roberts and Neidhart square off.  The Hart Foundation throws Santana out.  #9 is Danny Davis.  He brawls with Sam Houston.  Roberts punches Race, who is tied up in the ropes and keeps bouncing back up.  Roberts hits a backdrop suplex on Davis.  Roberts goes for the DDT, but Davis avoids it.  #10 is Boris Zhukov, who attacks Houston.  Everyone knows Russians hate pretty boys.  Everybody fights.  #11 is Don Muraco.  Nikolai Volkoff comes out too.  He thinks it’s his time.  The referees hold him back.  Zhukov gets eliminated.  Volkoff is overjoyed to finally be let in as #12.  Brunzell narrowly avoids getting eliminated.  Race isn’t so lucky.  He’s very unhappy at being eliminated.  Houston saves Roberts from being eliminated by Hart.  #13 is “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan.  Race attacks him in the aisle.  Duggan considers going after him, but marches to the ring and gets in the mix.  #14 is Ron Bass.  Volkoff eliminates Brunzell.  #15 is Brian Blair.  He goes after Hart.  Neidhart cuts him off.  Brunzell tries to eliminate Neidhart, but gets cut off by Bret.  Muraco saves him from being double teamed.  Crowd has been chanting “DDT!” intermittently.  #16 is Hillbilly Jim.  He immediately eliminates Neidhart, then beats up Davis.  Bass almost eliminates Blair.  Hey, he did go over the top rope and hit the apron, so under these rules, shouldn’t he be eliminated?  #17 is Dino Bravo (w/ Frenchy Martin).  Bass eliminates Sam Houston.  #18 is The Ultimate Warrior.  Muraco eliminates Hart, who was in the match for 25 minutes.  #19 is The One Man Gang.  Gang eliminates Blair and Roberts in short order.  The entrances are getting faster.  They must have been running long.  #20 is Junkyard Dog.  Everyone has entered, and the ring is full.  Duggan eliminates Volkoff.  Gang eliminates Hillbilly Jim.  Duggan tackle clotheslines Davis out of the ring.  Bravo and Gang eliminate Warrior.  Bass eliminates JYD.  Muraco eliminates Bass.  Final four are Muraco, Gang, Bravo, and Duggan.  Muraco evades being double teamed by the heels, dropkicks Gang, dropkicks Martin off the apron, then gets Bravo’s boots put to him.  Bravo holds Muraco for Gang to clothesline out of the ring.  Duggan is alone against 2 heels.  Duggan goes on the attack, but gets double teamed.  They try the same trick the did with Muraco, but Duggan ducks and Gang eliminates Bravo.  Duggan makes his comeback against Gang until Gang clobbers him.  Duggan low bridges a charging Gang out of the ring to win it in 33:27.  The Rumble is always fun.

Replays of the contract signing from earlier.

Craig DeGeorge interviews Hulk Hogan.  Hogan talks about Andre, then does his posing routine.

Main event time!

2/3 Falls Match: The Islanders vs. The Young Stallions.  There’s some convoluted storyline involving Matilda going on.  Tama beats on Powers.  Powers leapfrogs Tama, punches him, and slams him.  Tama bails for a moment.  Tama tauntingly offers a handshake.  Powers hits an atomic drop.  He and Roma punch Tama.  Powers takes a front bump into the turnbuckles.  Haku and Roma tag in and go at it.  Haku hits a nice arm drag.  Roma hits a cross body for 2.  Powers tags in and gets a 2 count on Haku after a double elbow smash.  Tag to Tama, who tosses Powers around.  Powers avoids an elbow drop.  The Islanders make quick tags and work over Powers.  Vince makes a kind of racist comment about Tama’s toes, and Jesse calls him on it.  Match goes on.  Roma gets some offense rolling on Tama.  Tama throws Roma out of the ring to eliminate him from the Royal Rum… nevermind.  Powers gets counted out to give the Islanders the first fall at 7:53.  Insta-commercials.

They show the Hogan/Andre shit again instead of going back to the match.

Craig DeGeorge interviews Andre and Dibiase, with Virgil.

The Stallions head back to the ring, with Roma selling the ribs.  Insta-commercials.  Fuck, this is an oddly structured show.

2/3 Falls Match: The Islanders vs. The Young Stallions, CONTINUED!  Roma is forced to start.  Tama kicks his ass.  Roma gets his knees up to counter a splash.  Haku and Powers tag in.  Powers dominates for a bit and gets a couple of near falls on Haku.  Haku gives Powers a chop to the gut and tags in Tama.  Haku quickly tags back in.  Powers inside cradles him for 2.  Haku hits a backbreaker for 2.  Tama tags in and beats up Powers.  Haku tags in and beats up Powers.  Haku hits a gutwrench suplex for 2, then locks Powers in an abdominal stretch.  Powers continues to take the beating.  Roma tags in and tries to fight, but gets hammered by Haku, who is a fucking beast of a man who I wish was currently on my TV every week.  Tama hits a diving splash on Roma, then Haku locks in a half crab for the pin in about 9 minutes.  They never bothered to ring the bell for the second fall.  The match was fine, but the way they structured the show was fucking stupid.

Vince and Jesse talk about stuff.  Mainly, Jesse helping Bravo lift the weight.  Jesse, awesome heel that he is, vehemently denies it.  They talk about the Hogan/Andre shit.  Of course, they have to replay it for the THIRD TIME.

Interesting show.  Some was bad, like the opener and the structure of the main event, and the bench press shit.  They spent too much time going back to the Hogan/Andre shit, too.  The Rumble was fun and I really enjoyed the Jumping Bomb Angel’s title win.  This was actually a TV special that aired on USA, and not a PPV, but I included it in the rotation anyway just because it’s the first Royal Rumble.

NWA Starrcade 1986: Night of the Skywalkers

Posted in WCW with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 27, 2010 by Grappleholic

Not even a warm up, as this goes straight to the first match.

Jimmy Garvin (w/ Precious) vs. Brad Armstrong.  Tony Schiavone does ring announcing.  He and some other guy I’ll hopefully figure out later on commentary.  Garvin and Armstrong lock up aggressively.  The referee’s name is either Scrappy or Slappy.  They don’t do anything of note.  They trade hammerlocks and wrestle a bit.  The referee’s name is Scrappy McAllen.  That’s hilarious.  Garvin milks a hold for a while.  Armstrong fights out and locks in an ARMBAR!  Garvin counters and locks in a head scissors.  They go back and forth.  Armstrong ends up back in the head scissors.  Armstrong eventually fights out and locks in a side headlock.  Garvin rolls into a pinning predicament and gets the pin, I think, but the referee caught him holding Armstrong’s trunks, so the match continues.  Garvin finally escapes the headlock with a backdrop suplex.  Eventual cover gets 2.  Garvin throws Armstrong out of the ring.  Precious yells at Armstrong.  Garvin kicks Armstrong in the head from in the ring.  Repeat.  Armstrong makes it back in and Garvin hit shots him into the ropes for 2.  Second cover gets 2.  Garvin hits a backbreaker for 2.  Garvin picks Armstrong up, but Armstrong lands on top for 2.  Armstrong charges Garvin in the corner and gets kneed in the face for 2.  Another cover gets 2.  Garvin uses a chin lock.  Armstrong escapes.  Garvin gets an inside cradle for 2.  Armstrong reverses it for 2.  Garvin slams Armstrong and goes up top, but misses a diving splash.  It’s a 15:00 draw at 15:08.  They keep fighting, but Armstrong eventually runs Garvin off.  Very meh match, way too long and uninteresting.

I already tell this is going to be an ordeal because that match was lame, and because my video isn’t the best quality and the audio is a little out of sync, which annoys me to no end.

Tom Miller is the ring announcer now.

The Barbarian & Shaska Whatley vs. Baron Von Raschke & Hector Guerrero.  This has to be another 2 location show, as Bob Caudle and Johnny Weaver are on commentary now.  All four brawl to start.  Hector and Whatley have a fine exchange.  Barbarian tags in and goes at it with Guerrero.  Hector avoids a clothesline.  Raschke holds Barbarian for Hector to hit a dive.  Hector and Whatley brawl outside.  Barbarian sends Hector into the barricade.  The heels work over Hector.  He does a great face in peril.  Hector spits in Whatley’s face and makes the hot tag.  Baron Von Raschke runs wild!  Claw hold to Whatley.  Barbarian saves.  Hector comes in and cleans his clock.  Baron avoids Whatley in the corner and drops an elbow for the pin in 6:29.  Decent stuff.  The heels beat down Rascke after the match until Hector makes it back in for the save.

No DQ Match for the NWA United States Tag Team Championship: Ivan Koloff & Krusher Khruschev (c) vs. The Kansas Jayhawks.  Koloff and Mantel start.  It’s… oddly kind of awesome.  Jayhawks make quick tags and work over Koloff in the early going.  Scrappy McAllen is the referee again!  Wooo!  Krusher tags in and beats up Mantel.  Dutch fights back and challenges Koloff to come in the ring while Jaggers chokes Koloff.  The Jayhawks take turns working over Krusher.  Ivan tags in and gets beat up some more.  Dutch gets the first near fall of the match on Ivan.  The Russians start to get heat on Dutch, beginning with Krusher beating him up on the outside.  Dutch plays face in peril.  Geeze ref, it’s no DQ, stop getting in the way of Jaggers trying to come in.  Dutch clotheslines the Russians and tags in Jaggers, who runs wild.  Clothesline on Koloff, but Krusher saves.  Ivan and Dutch brawl outside.  Ivan tries to come off the top with the chain onto Jaggers, but Dutch makes the save with a bull whip.  Dutch and Krusher brawl outside.  Krusher hits Jaggers with the chain, allowing Ivan to get the pin in 7:52.  This was fine.

Indian Strap Match: Rick Rude (w/ Paul Jones & Paul Jones’ bitchin’ mustache) vs. Wahoo McDaniel.  After some pre-match shenanigans, the match starts.  Wahoo whips Rude.  Repeat.  Rude hits some forearms.  Wahoo whips him, then hammers him down.  Usual strap match shit.  Rude beats up Wahoo.  Rude slams Wahoo, touches 2 corners, then gets cut off.  Wahoo beats up Rude.  Wahoo touches 3 corners, then gets cut off by Rude.  Rude stupidly goes up top and Wahoo yanks him off with the strap.  Wahoo touches 3 corners.  Jones tries to interfere and gets chopped.  Rude pushes Wahoo into the 4th corner for the win in about 8 minutes.  By the time the bell rings it’s an official 9:08.  Rude and Jones attack Wahoo, but Hector Guerrero and Baron Von Raschke make the save.  Next!

NWA Central States Heavyweight Championship Match: Sam Houston (c) vs. Bill Dundee.  Tony finally names his co-commentator, Rick Stewart.  Houston and Dundee go at it with some aggressive wrestling to start.  Houston does the side headlock rolled into a pinning predicament spot that I always mark out for.  Houston with a nice head scissors takedown.  Dundee takes Houston down  and works his arm a bit.  Houston fights back.  Really good simple wrestling here.  Houston goes for his bulldog headlock, fails, reverse cradle for 2.  Houston gets taken to the outside and Dundee beats on him.  Houston comes back with an atomic drop that catapults Dundee over the barricade.  Houston slingshots Dundee back into the ring and covers for 2.  Dundee kicks Houston in the face and hits a diving splash (or a diving punch?) for 2.  Dundee with a rear chin lock.  Dundee punches Houston a few times, then struts, the covers for 2.  Dundee locks Houston in a crab hold.  Houston powers out.  They roll into the ropes.  Dundee chokes Houston in the ropes.  Dundee throws Houston out of the ring.  Dundee with a front facelock on the mat.  Houston fights out and makes a fiery comeback.  Houston slams Dundee, then fails a knee drop.  Dundee attacks the knee viciously.  Houston’s boot comes off somehow and Dundee whacks him with it for the DQ in 10:22.  This was pretty good.

Hair vs. Hair Match: Paul Jones (w/ Manny Fernandez) vs. Jimmy Valiant (w/ Big Mama).  It’s Jones’ hair vs. Mama’s hair.  Also, it’s a different Big Mama than the one last year.  Also, Manny will be suspended above the ring in a cage.  The referee can’t get Manny to go into the cage.  More babyfaces come out to try to make him.  Manny fights off Nelson Royal, Tim Horner, and Baron Von Raschke, then Wahoo comes out and decks him, forcing him into the cage.  Jones tries to hold into the cage as it is raised.  The match finally start.  Valiant beats up Jones.  Kids, this is what wrestlers looked like before the emphasis was placed on having good bodies.  Jones takes a foreign object out of his tights and decks Valiant, but stupidly doesn’t cover.  Valiant is BUSTED WIDE OPEN!  Eventual cover gets 2.  Jones drops Valiant and covers again, but Valiant gets his foot on the bottom rope.  Jones goes to stomp it and hurts his leg.  Jones hits him with the object again for 2.  Jones goes for the Indian Death Lock, but gets countered.  Valiant makes his comeback and locks Jones in the sleeper hold.  Valiant gets hold on Jones’ object and hits him with it, then gets the pin in 4:28 (official.  Fuck they take forever to ring the closing bell.).  Valiant shaves Jones’ head.  Manny Fernandez is released from the cage and attacks Valiant.  Rick Rude comes out to join the beatdown.  They hit a swank elevated DDT that some tag team should adopt as a finish on Valiant and onto a steel chair.  Raschke and Wahoo come out to check on Valiant.  Too little, too late, guys.

Louisville Street Fight: Ron Garvin vs. Big Bubba Rogers (w/ Jim Cornette).  Tommy Young is the referee!  Garvin punches Bubba to no effect.  He punches him some more and finally drops him.  Bubba rolls out of the ring to hear some advince from Cornette.  Garvin punches Bubba some more.  For some reason everytime I go to type “Garvin” I accidentally type “Garven” first.  That makes absolutely no sense.  Anyway, Garin beats up Bubba some more.  Bubba finally manages to get some offense going.  Garvin pulls a good length rope out of his boots, chokes Bubba, tries to hog tie him, beats him, ties him to the top rope and bites him.  Bubba fights back, but he looks winded.  Bear hug by Bubba.  Garvin headbutts his way free.  Bubba bear hugs him again.  Garvin headbutts his way free again.  Garvin throws some punches and knocks Bubba out of the ring.  Bubba comes back in and Garvin punches on him some more.  Bubba falls out of the ring again.  Garvin follows him out and they brawl.  Back inside, Bubba goes up top!  Garvin throws him off Flair-style and covers, but Bubba throws Garvin on top of the referee.  Garvin hits a DANGEROUS looking piledriver.  Cornette whacks Garvin with the tennis racket.  The referee counts them both down for the double KO… but there MUST be a winner!  So, the first man to his feet will be the winner.  Cornette comes in to try to help Bubba up.  Young shoves him out of the ring.  Bubba grabs the referee as Garvin gets up.  Cornette hits Garvin with the tennis racket again and drops him.  Bubba gets to his feet for the win in 11:52.  This was fun in some parts.

First Blood Match for the NWA World Television Championship: Dusty Rhodes (c) vs. Tully Blanchard (w/ JJ Dillon).  No opening bell that I heard.  Also, Dillon goes from behind fine to randomly having his head covered in blood at ringside.  What’s up with that?  They both try to protect themselves from getting punched in the face.  Blanchard backs off every time Dusty cocks his elbow.  They go a little bit.  Dusty poises to punch Blanchard in the face and Blanchard bails.  Dusty headbutts Blanchard in the face.  Hey, Earl Hebner is the referee!  Anyway, they brawl a bit.  Dusty works Tully’s leg, which strikes me as a stupid strategy in a first blood match.  Blanchard rips at Dusty’s forehead.  Dusty stomps Blanchard’s face.  Dusty accidentally elbows the referee.  Hebner gets up and Dusty suplexes Blanchard on top of him.  Dusty throws Dillon’s shoe (which I guess Dillon threw to Tully) away and hits some bionic elbows.  Blanchard is bleeding, but the referee is still down.  Dillon wipes off Blanchard’s forehead and rubs Vaseline on it.  Blanchard hits Dusty with a roll of coins.  The referee wakes up to see Rhodes bleeding and awards the match to Blanchard in about 8 minutes.  Still more meh on this show.

Copy & Pasted from the Starrcade: The Essential Collection DVD review, slightly edited:

Scaffold Match: The Road Warriors (w/ Paul Ellering) vs. The Midnight Express (w/ Jim Cornette & Big Bubba Rogers).  The Road Warriors wait at the top during the ring intros.  Loverboy Dennis Condrey teases climbing up, but chickens out.  MX finally does come up.  The bell rings and the Road Warriors kick ass.  Condrey throws powder in Hawk’s eyes.  Eaton does the same to Animal.  They fight on top of the scaffold.  That sentence will cover the rest of the match until someone takes a stupid, unnecessary bump.  Condrey falls, then Eaton, to give the Road Warriors the win at 7:08.  Ellering takes Cornette’s tennis racket.  Cornette climbs the scaffold to escape and runs right into Animal.  Cornette falls and blows out his knees.

Steel Cage Match for the NWA World Tag Team Championship: The Rock & Roll Express (c) vs. Ole & Arn Anderson.  Ole and Gibson lock up.  Gibson ducks a blow and throws some punches.  Arn tags in.  All 4 brawl for a minute.  The referee sends Gibson out and the Andersons beat up Gibson a bit.  Gibson fires back in Arn.  Ole tags in and brawls with Gibson.  Morton tags in and beats up Ole.  Arn tags back in and goes at it with Morton.  Gibson tags in and gets beat up by the Andersons.  Gibson avoids a figure-four by kicking Arn face first into the cage.  Ole tags in and stomps on Gibson as he tries to make it to his corner.  Gibson gets beat up, then makes the tag to Morton, who runs wild for about a second until Ole rams into the cage a couple of times.  Morton gets his ass stomped by the Andersons for a while.  Morton is BUSTED WIDE OPEN!  The complete destruction of Ricky Morton continues for several minutes.  Arn hits the spinebuster on Morton for the sure pin, but Gibson saves!  Ole tags in and Arn holds Morton for Ole to come off the top with a knee to the arm.  Ole has been working the shit out of that arm, and goes back to it now.  Man, Ricky got SO close to make the tag that time, but Ole cut him off at the last possible second.  Morton fires some punches at Ole, then gets him in an inside cradle, but Arm saves.  Robert comes in and goes after Arn.  Ole picks up Morton for a slam, but Gibson dropkicks him and Morton gets the pin in Ole in 19:03.  Really good formula tag match here.  The R&R escape the cage before they can get their asses kicked too much more.

NWA World Heavyweight Championship Match: Ric Flair (c) vs. NWA United States Heavyweight Champion Nikita Koloff.  Tommy Young is the referee!  They lock up.  Koloff over powers Flair.  Repeated.  Flair bails.  Flair foolishly gets into a test of strength, fails that, and throws some hard chops at Nikita.  Nikita no sells, which scares Flair into bailing again.  Nikita overpowers Flair again.  Flair yells that he’s going to kick Nikita’s ass.  Hah.  Nikita hip tosses Flair.  They lock up again, and Nikita hip tosses Flair again, then slams him.  Twice.  Big slams, too.  Less body slam, more throwing Flair halfway across the ring.  Flair tries a shoulder block, fails, and gets bear hugged.  Nikita turns the bear hug into a pinning predicament for a pair of 2 counts.  Neat.  Flair avoids Nikita in the corner and hits a big vertical suplex.  Nikita springs up and Flair begs off, then bails again.  Back inside, Nikita grabs a side headlock.  Flair backs him into the ropes and beats on him some.  Nikita goes the Russian Hammer (chokeslam without the slam).  Young makes him break the choke.  Flair avoids Nikita and Nikita goes over the top rope.  Flair wraps Nikita’s leg around the ring post, then chop blocks the leg back inside.  Flair continues working the leg and locks in the figure-four leglock, using the ropes behind the referee’s back.  Flair eventually breaks it and beats up Nikita some more.  Flair throws chops, which seem to just piss Nikita off.  Flair sends Nikita out of the ring.  Flair rams Nikita into the scaffold and busts him open.  Back inside, Flair hits a knee drop for 2, but Nikita kicks out emphatically.  Flair hits a backdrop suplex for 2, another emphatic kick out.  Flair punches Nikita in the forehead, presumably to make him bleed worse.  Nikita gets pissed and makes a comeback.  He tosses Flair around.  Flair begs off, but Nikita whips him into the corner.  Flair flips out and Nikita goes after him.  Nikita counters Flair and rams his face into the scaffold.  Flair finally makes it back inside.  He and Nikita trade blows.  Flair flops face first into the mat.  Nikita hits a shoulder block and Flair bounces into Tommy Young, sending him out of the ring.  Nikita kills Flair with a clothesline.  Cover, but there’s no referee.  Referee Scrappy McAllen is back to check on Tommy Young.  Flair catches Nikita with a knee to the back and Scrappy makes a 2 count.  Is his name McAllen or McGowen?  I can’t tell.  It’s a moot point, as Nikita accidentally murders him with a clothesline.  Tommy Young makes it back inside.  He tries to force Nikita to break in the corner.  Nikita shoves him twice, so Young calls for the DQ in 19:23.  They keep brawling.  Nikita kills everyone who runs in.  All of the heels run in and gang up on him.  The babyfaces run in to make the save.  The official decision is a double DQ.  The match was pretty good.  Flair and Nikita fight some more, but it’s eventually broken up.  Replays of the wild clusterfuck at the end.

End credits.

The show was alright in some places, very boring in others.  I guess I’ll give it a thumbs in the middle.

NWA Starrcade 1985: The Gathering

Posted in WCW with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 25, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE 24/7 version of the show.

DISCO BALL!

Bob Caudle and Tony Schiavone are our hosts.  This is apparently a simulcast ala WrestleMania II from The Omni in Atlanta and the Greensboro Coliseum in Greensboro.  Caudle and Solie are in Atlanta and Johnny Weaver is in Greensboro.  Weaver looks so clueless.

Tom Miller is Atlanta’s ring announcer.

They play the national anthem.

Music and a light show, which seems to be the 80’s equivalent of pyro and ballyhoo.

NWA Mid-Atlantic Heavyweight Championship Match: Krusher Khruschev vs. Sam Houston.  Krusher Khruschev is Barry Darsow in his most difficult to spell gimmick.  The referee holds up a belt that is on the line, but nobody bothers to specify what championship is on the line.  Nothing of note happens.  Houston avoids an elbow drop.  They lock up.  Houston lands on his feet from an elbow drop and punches him.  Schiavone finally says it’s the Mid-Atlantic title that’s up for grabs here, so I’ll go back and put that at the beginning.  Houston utilizes a head scissors.  Khruschev turns it into a pinning predicament.  Houston turns it back.  Khruschev uses his power.  Or something.  Fuck, this is boring.  Houston makes his comeback and pops the crowd.  Punch, dropkick, ARMBAR!  The announcers are barely talking, which is disconcerting for some reason.  Khruschev back body drops Houston.  The match goes on unmercifully.  Khruschev body slams Houston and does up top, but Houston dropkicks him and he crotches himself.  Houston throws some punches, then hits a bulldog headlock for the pin… NO.  Fuck.  Khruschev’s foot was on the bottom rope.  Khruschev hits the Sickle to put me out of my misery at 9:29 to win the title.  Retain the title?  They didn’t specify if someone was champion or if it was vacant.  Ah, Wikipedia says vacant.

Mexican Death Match: “Ragin’ Bull” Manny Fernandez vs. Abdullah the Butcher (w/ Paul Jones).  The way it’s explained, it’s basically a sombrero on a pole match.  They brawl.  Abby hits him with the timekeeper’s mallet.  Manny is BUSTED WIDE OPEN.  Manny kicks Abby with his cowboy boots and actually manages to monkey flip him.  Manny takes a boot off and whacks him with it.  Abby is bleeding after being repeatedly hit with the boot.  Abby gets the boot and whacks Manny with it.  Abby goes for the sombrero, but Manny stops up and Abby takes a back bump off of the middle rope.  Manny whacks him with the boot.  Manny goes for the sombrero, but Abby whacks him with the boot.  Abby goes for it again, but Manny takes his belt off and whips Abdullah with it.  Abdullah fights back and drops Manny with a headbutt.  Manny avoids an elbow drop that would have certainly squashed him.  Manny rallies.  Manny SUPLEXES Abdullah.  Manny goes for the sombrero, but Abby hits him in the balls.  Manny rallies again and hits a forearm (“Flying burrito!”).  Another of off the turnbuckles drops Abdullah.  Manny goes for a diving splash, but Abdullah moves.  Manny avoids a charge in the corner and grabs the sombrero for the win at about the 9 minute mark.  Well, it was better than the first match.

Johnny Weaver interviews the new Mid-Atlantic Champion, Krusher Khruschev.  Hey, I don’t think he’s REALLY Russian.  Something is amiss here!

Texas Bull Rope Match: Ron Bass vs. Black Bart (w/ JJ Dillon).  If Bass wins, he gets 5 minutes with Dillion in a Bull Rope Match.  Bass kicks Bart in the gut and whacks him with the cowbell.  He continues whacking Bart with the bell and generally abusing him.  Bart gets the cowbell and takes control.  Crowd seems fairly uninterested, and so do I.  Bass is BUSTED WIDE OPEN!, as is Bart.  Bass grinds the rope against Bart’s bloody forehead.  Bart tries to hit Bass with the cowbell, but Bass grabs his arm and powers it away.  Bart misses a clothesline and goes over of the top rope.  Bass follows him out, they brawl for a second, then they roll back inside.  Bass gets a 2 count after hitting Bart with a bell yet again.  Bass creatively low blows Bart with the rope and flips him over.  Bass hits Bart with the cowbell again for 2.  Bass comes off the middle rope and hits Bart with the cowbell for the pin in about 8:40-ish (They make me screw up match times a lot because they like to ring closing bell long after I’ve given up and stopped my watch).  Dillion attacks Bass immediately

Texas Bull Rope Match: Ron Bass vs. JJ Dillon (w/ Black Bart).  Dillion puts the boots to Bass.  The referee makes him tie the rope to his wrist.  Dillon hits Bass with the cowbell for 2.  Dillon chokes Bass with the cowbell.  Bass hulks up and beats up Dillon.  Dillon bleeds too.  Bass accidentally knocks the referee down.  Black Bart comes back in and hits a piledriver on Bass, then pulls Dillon top of him for the pin in 3:30.  Very unexciting stuff on this show so far.

The Barbarian (w/ Paul Jones) and “Superstar” Billy Graham come out.  Apparently they’re going to have a $10,000 arm wrestling match, then have a wrestling match.  Graham wins.  Jones whacks him with his cane.

The Barbarian (w/ Paul Jones) vs. “Superstar” Billy Graham.  Barbarian starts off with the unfair advantage.  How dastardly.  Graham avoids a diving headbutt and makes a comeback.  Bearhug.  I know that’s not a complete sentence.  Bite me.  Jones attacks Graham with his cane for the DQ in 3:02.  Graham takes the cane and whacks Jones.  Barbarian attacks Graham from behind, then rams him into the post on the outside.  Barbarian continues to attack Graham until the referee breaks it up.  The referee raises Graham’s hand for his hollow victory.  Nothing to see here.  But they think so, because they show replays.

NWA National Heavyweight Championship Match: Terry Taylor (c) vs. “Nature Boy” Buddy Landel.  They fuck around a bit, then Taylor slaps the shit out of Landel.  Landel is Ric Flair-lite.  They lock up and Landel works Taylor’s arm.  Taylor arm drags his way out of it and they lock up again.  Taylor blocks some punches and knocks Landel down.  Landel with a side headlock takeover.  Taylor turns it into a pinning predicament for 2 in a spot I always love.  They keep going, and it’s good stuff.  JJ Dillon, who was supposed to come out with Landel, finally makes his way to ringside.  Taylor hits a leg drop and covers, but Landel gets his foot on the ropes.  Taylor throws some chops in the corner.  Landel drops him with a clothesline for 2.  Taylor gets an inside cradle for 2.  Landel kicks him in the head and locks him in the camel clutch.  Taylor fights back.  Taylor hits a suplex for 2.  Ref bump.  Second ref bump, as Landel pushes Taylor into the referee.  Taylor reverse an Irish whip, causing Landel and Dillon to collide.  Taylor goes for the superplex, but Dillion trips Taylor and Landel lands on top for the pin in 10:29.  Good match!

NWA National Tag Team Championship Match: Ole & Arn Anderson (c) vs. Wahoo McDaniel & Billy Jack Haynes.  Hayes and Arn start.  Man, Hayes is JACKED.  Arn leap frogs Haynes, then gets press slammed.  Ole tags in and locks up with Haynes.  3 times.  Hayes punches him.  Wahoo tags in and beats up Ole.  Arn tags in.  Wahoo chops him.  Side headlock takeover by Wahoo.  Arn gets him in a head scissors.  Wahoo escapes.  The Andersons start tagging in and out and get heat on Wahoo.  Wahoo chops the crap out of Arn, but Ole stops him from making the tag.  Wahoo chops the shit out of Ole too.  Haynes gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Clusterfuck ensues for a moment.  Wahoo gets out the Andersons double team Haynes a bit.  Wahoo tags back in and chops the fuck out of Arn some more.  Big chop and a cover by Wahoo, but Ole saves.  Ole trips Wahoo, which allows Arn to get a 2 count.  Ole trips Wahoo in the corner and holds his feet to allow Arn to get the pin in 9:00.  Pretty good stuff here too.

Johnny Weaver announces a 15 minute intermission.  Cut to, presumably 15 minutes later, where Weaver interviews Buddy Landel and JJ Dillon.

Blanchard vs. Magnum time!  Oh fuck yes!

Copy & Pasted from the Starrcade: The Essential Collection DVD review, slightly edited.

“I Quit” Steel Cage Match for the NWA United States Heavyweight Championship: Tully Blanchard (c) (w/ Baby Doll) vs. Magnum T.A.  They lock up.  Tully throws a punch, Magnum throws one of his own, and the crowd pops big.  Man, Magnum was OVER.  The crowd comes to life whenever he throws a punch or does anything else for that matter.  Tully gets heat, Magnum makes a small comeback and pops the crowd, Tully gets heat again.  Rinse, lather, repeat, but it’s good stuff.  Magnum goes head-first into the cage and gets cut.  Either Tully gets color too, or Magnum’s blood gets on him, or both.  Tully tries to make Magnum quit, but Magnum responds with a resounding “HELL NO!”  Magnum fights back, but Tully won’t quit either.  Magnum punches Tully in the corner, but Tully gives him an inverted atomic drop, then beats him in the head with the microphone.  Somebody (Baby Doll I presume) throws a wooden chair over the cage to Tully.  Tully breaks it and tries to use a piece of it to stab Magnum in the eye.  Magnum gets hold of the spike and sticks it into Tully’s head, forcing Tully to quit at 14:48.  Really great match.  It’s an old fashioned bloody, hate-filled brawl that still stands the test of time.

Atlanta Street Fight: The Midnight Express (w/ Jim Cornette) vs. Jimmy Valiant & Miss Atlanta Lively (w/ Big Mama).  Miss Atlanta Lively is Ron Garvin in drag.  They brawl.  Garvin throws powder in Eaton’s face and chokes him.  Valiant hits Condrey with a chair on the outside.  Condrey is already bleeding.  They trade off and keep brawling.  MX is working in their tuxedos.  Eaton is bleeding too.  Valiant and Lively whip Condrey into Eaton.  Valiant locks Condrey in a sleeper hold.  MX throws powder into Valiant’s face and beat on him.  Eaton hits Lively with the powder too.  MX try to pull Lively’s tights off.  Valiant saves her/him.  MX gets their tuxes ripped up.  Valiant is taken down to the outside.  Cornette comes and hits Lively with the tennis racket.  MX double teams Lively.  Valiant tries to save, but Eaton throws him back outside.  Valiant tries to come back again, but gets beaten down.  Eaton comes off the top rope and Lively catches up with a shot.  Lively gets the pin in 6:37.  This sucked.  Valiant and Lively strip Cornette down to his drawers.

Johnny Weaver interviews the new United States Champion, Magnum T.A.  Magnum says he’ll be a fighting champion.

Steel Cage Match for the NWA World Tag Team Championship: Ivan & Nikita Koloff (w/ NWA-Mid-Atlantic Heavyweight Champion Krusher Khruschev) vs. The Rock & Roll Express (w/ Don Kernodle).  Morton and Nikita lock up.  Morton hits a dropkick to a huge pop.  Nikita beats up Morton.  Ivan tags in.  Morton gets a 2 count off of a cross body.  Gibson tags in and dropkicks Ivan, then slams him, then drops a knee for 2.  R&Rs make quick tags and work over Ivan.  Inva bleeds from all of the punishment he’s taking, and makes the heroic tag to Nikita, who runs wild on the dastardly R&Rs.  Wait, the Russians are the heels?  I jest, I jest.  Ivan tags back in as the Russians punish Gibson.  Ivan rams Gibson into the cage and hits an elbow drop for 2.  The Russians make quick tags and double team Gibson behind the referee’s back when given the opportunity.  Gibson avoids a running knee into the ropes/cage by Ivan.  Russians continue to beat on him.  Gibson avoids an Ivan leg drop.  The match goes on.  There’s a ref bump.  Morton gets the hot tag and immediately pins Ivan with a reverse cradle (right after Ivan backdropped Gibson) in 12:27 to win the titles.  Pretty good match.  The Russians try to do a beat down.  Morton escapes the cage.  Khruschev comes in and Russians beat down Gibson.  Don Kernodle is down from some attack we didn’t see.  Ivan whips the shit out of Gibson with the chain.  A bunch of people finally come in to scrape Gibson’s carcass up and the Russians leave.

Copy & Pasted from the Starrcade: The Essential Collection DVD review, slightly edited.

NWA World Heavyweight Championship Match: Ric Flair (c) vs. Dusty Rhodes.  Tommy Young is the referee.  They lock up, then Dusty clubbers Flair.  Flair bails and takes a moment to compose himself before coming back in.  Flair leapfrogs Dusty, but takes a Bionic Elbow to the head.  Flair takes another breather.  Back inside, Dusty works Flair’s arm over.  Flair gets out of it and fires away with chops.  Flair kicks Dusty’s leg and apparently hurts it, because Dusty howls in pain and bails.  Ah, it’s the same leg that the Horsemen broke months earlier.  Dusty mans up and comes back the apron, where he nails Flair with some more elbows.  Dusty works on Flair’s leg.  Flair tries to suplex Dusty, but can’t get him up.  Dusty reverses it and suplexes Flair, then goes back to the leg.  Flair manages to get Dusty in a sleeper hold, but Dusty escapes and sends Flair face first into the turnbuckle.  Dusty wraps Flair’s leg around the post.  Flair goes up top and gets thrown off for the 5 billionth time.  Dusty goes for the figure-four, but Flair pushes him away.  Flair fires a chop and goes for the figure-four, but Dusty pushes him away.  Flair tries again with the same result.  The fight some more.  Dusty gets thrown over the top rope while the referee isn’t looking, but makes it back in and hits a diving cross body for a near fall.  They fight some more, then Flair punishes Dusty’s leg some more.  Flair locks in the figure-four and tortures Dusty, but eventually releases the hold.  Dusty hits some elbows for a near fall.  There’s a ref bump.  Dusty puts Flair in the figure-four.  Arn and Ole Anderson run in and attack Dusty.  A second referee comes in and makes a two count for Flair.  Dusty gets an inside cradle and pins Flair at 22:07.  The babyfaces come down and celebrate with Dusty.  Dusty’s title win here was, appropriately, a Dusty finish, as the decision was reversed a few days later.

Replay of the finish.

Schiavone interviews Rhodes amongst the babyface celebration.  Schiavone and Caudle talk about what we’ve seen tonight.

A highlights video closes the show.

This show is a mix of some really good stuff and some really awful crap.