Archive for Matt Striker

WWE Superstars 3/3/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 10, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, Superstars open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Scott Stanford and Josh Matthews are the first announcers.  They promise more replays from Raw.  Justin Roberts is the first ring announcer.

R-Truth vs. William Regal.  Hell yes!  They lock up and do some pimp chain wrestling for a second.  Truth hits a flying headscissors and a side headlock takeover.  They work the headlock a bit in a spot that I love.  Truth dances and kicks Regal in the face for 2.  Truth goes back to a headlock.  Regal gets his chance and set out to maul a fucker.  Regal hits a knee drop, then pounds on Truth’s face, then clamps on a rear chin lock.  Truth fights out.  Regal hits an Exploder and an elbow drop for 2.  Regal applies a chin lock again.  Truth fights out again and makes his comeback.  Regal dodges the Lie Detector and goes for a Butterfly Suplex, but Truth counters and hits the What’s Up for the pin in 4:24.  Fun match.

Tonight, Santino & Kozlov vs. Ryder & Primo again.

WWE.com plug.

Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov (w/ Tamina) vs. Zack Ryder & Primo.  Primo and Santino do a bit of back and forth wrestling, complete the stalemate and applause!  Santino scares Primo out of the ring with the Cobra.  Ryder tags in and beats up Santino.  Santino hits an STO and tags in Kozlov.  Santino and Kozlov takes turns beating on Kozlov.  Kozlov throws Ryder to the floor.  Santino scares Primo with the Cobra again, and Kozlov sends him to the floor as well.  Insta-commercials.  Primo tries to beat up Kozlov, but Kozlov catches a cross body and hits a fall away slam.  Primo avoids Kozlov in the corner and tags in Ryder.  Ryder hits a missile dropkick for 2.  Ryder hits a neckbreaker for 2.  Primo tags in and keeps the heat going on Kozlov.  Santino and Ryder tag in.  Santino runs wild and hits the falling headbutt for 2.  Primo saves.  Kozlov sends Primo out.  Ryder sends Kozlov out.  Primo dodges the Rough Ryder and hits the Cobra for the pin in (6:00 shown).  Fun little match.

Tonight, replay of The Rock’s promo from Raw!  Aren’t you excited?

Jack Korpela and Matt Striker are now the announcers.  Tony Chimel is now the ring announcer.

Replay of Shawn Michaels speaking on the Undertaker/Triple H WrestleMania match.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Sin Cara is coming to WWE!

Curt Hawkins vs. Chris Masters.  They lock up.  Masters throws Hawkins across the ring, then chops the crap out of him.  Hawkins hits a jawbreaker, then trips Masters and causes him to face plant.  Hawkins beats on Masters.  Hawkins hits a backdrop suplex for 2.  Hawkins applies a body scissors.  Masters stands up with Hawkins on his back and rams him into the post, then catches a dropkick and catapults Hawkins into the turnbuckles.  Masters makes his comeback and hits a diving shoulder block for 2.  Masters locks in the Master Lock for the win in 3:21.  It was fine.  Tyler Reks appears and attacks Masters.  Reks delivers his Burning Hammer.

Up next, replay from Raw!

The main event of Superstars is replays of the war of words between John Cena and The Rock.  That’s pretty lame.

The wrestling was pretty solid this week.

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WWE Superstars 2/24/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 5, 2011 by Grappleholic

Superstars open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Tonight, Daniel Bryan takes on Ted Dibiase Jr.!  Jack Korpela and Matt Striker are the first announcers.  Tony Chimel is the first ring announcer.

Non-Title: WWE Tag Team Champions Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater of The Corre vs. JTG & Trent Barreta.  JTG and Barreta beat up Gabriel a bit.  Slater tags in and gets the advantage.  The Corre cut off Barreta and get the heat on him.  JTG gets the hot tag and runs wild on Slater.  JTG hits the Mugshot.  Gabriel saves.  Clusterfuck ensues.  Gabriel kicks JTG from the outside.  Slater hits a reverse DDT for the pin in 4:08.  It was fine.

2/21/11 will be revealed tonight… again…

Tyler Reks vs. Chris Masters.  Jobber entrance for Masters, even though he beat Reks last week.  They brawl.  Reks gets the advantage and puts a beating on Masters.  Front suplex gets 2.  Reks applies a half crab.  Masters gets a rope break, then counters a suplex into an inside cradle for 2.  Masters hits a Samoan Drop and makes his comeback.  Reks kicks him in the head.  Masters counters a neckbreaker and hits a spinebuster for 2.  Reks goes for a superplex.  Masters fights him off and hits a diving shoulder block.  Masters locks in the Master Lock to win it 2 weeks in a row in 3:27.  Fine little match.

Tonight, Bryan vs. Dibiase!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Scott Stanford and Josh Matthews are now the announcers.  Justin Roberts is now the ring announcer.

Santino Marella (w/ Tamina) vs. Tyson Kidd.  They fuck around a bit.  Kidd hides in the ropes to protect himself from the Cobra.  Santino hits a shoulder block, then poses.  Kidd grabs a headlock.  Santino leap frogs him, then trips him on the drop down.  Santino cranks on Kidd’s arm.  Kidd gets pissed at this silliness and beats up Santino.  Santino gets a reverse cradle for 2.  Santino hits his face on the turnbuckle when he’s kicked off.  Kidd avoids some wild punches and lands a forearm smash.  Kidd slaps Santino’s head a bunch.  Santino hulks up and makes his comeback.  Kidd hits a dropkick to the side of Santino’s head for 2.  Santino avoids the Superstar Elbow and hits the Cobra for the pin in 4:04.  This was silly.

2/21/11 revealed again next.

They waste 10 minutes replaying the Undertaker/Triple H segment from Raw.

The main event is NEXT!

They show Maryse blowing off Dibiase and kissing Yoshi Tatsu during the stupid kiss cam thing on Raw last week.

Non-Title: WWE United States Champion Daniel Bryan vs. Ted Dibiase Jr. (w/ Maryse).  They work a Greco-Roman knuckle lock and trade blows.  Bryan lands a flurry of kicks, then a shoulder block and a dropkick.  Bryan lands another kick for 2.  Dibiase beats on Bryan in the corner.  Bryan hits another dropkick for 2.  Bryan rocks a surfboard hold.  Dibiase breaks free.  Bryan lands on his feet from a backdrop suplex, then does a 360 bump for a clothesline.  Insta-commercials.  Bryan fights out of a rest hold.  Dibiase hits a backbreaker and a dropkick for 2.  Dibiase keeps the heat going.  Elbow smash gets 2.  Dibiase chokes Bryan in the corner with his boot.  Bryan back flips over Dibiase and makes his comeback.  Bryan hits a corner dropkick for 2.  Bryan counters the Dream Street into the Bret/Piper WrestleMania VIII pin (which I LOVE) for 2.  Bryan sends Dibiase outside and lands a tope suicida.  Back inside, Dibiase avoids a missile dropkick and goes for the Dream Street.  He can get it, but hits a half nelson suplex instead!  Cover gets 2.  Yoshi Tatsu comes out in a suit and presents Maryse with flowers, which distracts Dibiase.  Maryse declines Yoshi’s request for another kiss and slaps Dibiase with the flowers.  Bryan locks in the LeBell Lock for the win (7:30 shown).  Fine little match.

Pretty mediocre show with a fun main event.

WWE Elimination Chamber 2011

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 2, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, PPV open, pyro and ballyhoo.  We are LIVE from Oakland, California!  Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, and Booker T are the announcers.  Tony Chimel and Justin Roberts are the ring announcers.

Tony Chimel introduces Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio.  Del Rio cuts a promo about how he’ll win the title at WrestleMania.  He’s interrupted by his opponent, Kofi Kingston.

Non-Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston.  They lock up.  Kofi backs Del Rio into the corner.  Del Rio cowers for safety in the ropes.  I think I hear a “DEL RIO!” chant.  Del Rio gets the advantage and goes to work.  Kofi rallies and Del Rio hides in the ropes again, then bails.  Ricardo fans Del Rio with his scarf.  Awesome.  Kofi goes after Del Rio on the outside and brings him back in.  Kofi beats up Del Rio.  Booker is kind of obnoxious on commentary.  Kofi tries to go up top and gets bumped to the floor.  Del Rio sends Kofi into the steps and throws him back into the ring.  Cover gets 2.  Del Rio applies a body scissors.  Kofi fights out.  Del Rio throws him down and covers for 2.  Del Rio pounds on Kofi.  Del Rio hits a backdrop suplex for 2, then goes back to the body scissors.  Kofi escapes again and hits a rebound flying forearm.  They trade blows.  Kofi makes his comeback and hits the Boom Drop.  Kofi goes for the Trouble In Paradise, but Del Rio avoids it, then avoids Kofi in the corner.  Kofi hits the pendulum kick and goes for the diving cross body.  Del Rio catches him midair with knees for 2.  Del Rio goes for a superplex, but Kofi fights him off and hits a missile dropkick for 2.  Del Rio hits a swank gut buster for 2.  Kofi catches Del Rio with a DDT and covers.  Ricardo distracts the referee and Kofi.  Del Rio goes for the Minoru Special, but Kofi counters into the S.O.S. for 2.  Del Rio hits a swank hangman’s neckbreaker and follows with the Minoru Special.  Kofi tries to fight it, but is forced to submit in 10:29.  Good match.

Randy Orton stalks around backstage.  This is heavily discussed by the announcers.

Todd Grisham interviews World Heavyweight Champion Edge.  Drew McIntyre interrupts to bitch at him about Kelly Kelly being fired.  McIntyre says he’ll win the title tonight.  Edge takes him about as seriously as I do.

Elimination Chamber song!

Elimination Chamber hype video.

Entrances for the Smackdown Chamber Match.  Teddy Long comes out to introduce the replacement for the recently fired Dolph Ziggler, The Big Show!

Elimination Chamber Match for the World Heavyweight Championship: Edge (c) vs. Kane vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Wade Barrett vs. The Big Show vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.  Edge and Mysterio start.  Edge wins the lock up, then they trade blows.  Edge hits a flapjack for 2.  Mysterio hits a flying headscissors.    Edge back body drops Mysterio out of the ring and onto the steel floor.  Ouch.  Mysterio taunts McIntyre into punching his pod, then hits Edge with a flying move that I totally missed because I was typing.  Shit.  I bet it was a sweet Frankensteiner, too.  Cover gets 2.  Edge sends Mysterio into the side of the chamber and puts the boots to him.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Mysterio drop toe holds Edge into the turnbuckles.  Barrett enters the match and goes to work on Mysterio.  Edge launches Mysterio into a seated senton on Barrett, then slides Mysterio out of the ring.  Barrett drops Edge for 2.  Barrett throws Mysterio back into the ring and hits a pumphandle slam for 2.  Barrett continues to beat up Mysterio and Edge.  Edge low bridges Barrett out of the ring.  Mysterio comes back to life and dropkicks Edge.  He goes up top, but Barrett cuts him off and goes for the Wasteland.  Mysterio grabs onto the cage to save himelf and tries to climb up.  Barrett tries a powerbomb, but Mysterio ranas him into the ring.  Mysterio goes for the 619, but Edge mows him down with a big boot for 2.  Edge stomps Barrett in the corner.  Kane enters the match and runs wild.  Everybody takes turns getting near falls.  Edge, Mysterio, and Barrett do a double clothesline spot.  Kane clears the ring and beats up Barrett on the outside.  Mysterio goes up top, but gets punched by Kane and falls into the tree of woe.  Edge hits Mysterio with a dropkick for 2.  Kane kicks ass some more.  McIntyre enters the match and immediately throws Mysterio like a lawn dart into a pod, breaking the class.  McIntyre and Barrett beat up Kane.  McIntyre turns on Barrett and throws him through the glass too.  McIntyre is vicious tonight!  He goes to work on Edge, at whom he’s good and pissed off.  McIntyre goes for the Future Shock, but Edge counters and hits the Edgecution.  Edge goes to spear McIntyre, but gets caught by Edge.  Lots of counters.  Mysterio misses the 619 on Kane.  Kane throws Mysterio into the post.  Ouch.  Kane counters the Future Shock and back body drops McIntyre into Kane.  Kane and Edge boot each other down.  Big Show enters the match and runs wild on everyone except for Barrett, who cowers away.  Show gets hold of him and throws him through the class.  They’re going to have to replace all of that glass for the other chamber match.  Show beats the shit out of Barrett and kills him with the KO punch for the pin in 18:50.  Mysterio is on top of a pod.  Kane hits Show with a diving lariat.  Edge hits Show with a diving elbow drop for 2.  McIntyre hits Show with the Future Shock for 2.  Mysterio comes off of the pod with the seated senton for 2.  Kane boots Show.  Mysterio hits the 619.  Edge spears Show.  Kane decks Edge and Mysterio, then chokeslams Show for the pin in 20:54.  McIntyre comes off the top, but Kane catches him and chokeslams him for the pin in 21:09.  Edge and Mysterio try to work together, but Kane kicks their asses.  Mysterio plants Kane with a swinging DDT for 2.  Mysterio hits a springboard enzui leg drop for 2.  Mysterio hits the 619 and goes for the diving senton.  Kane catches him.  Edge spears both of them together and pins Kane in 22:51.  Kane chokeslams Mysterio and Edge before leaving.  They eventually make it up.  Mysterio avoids the spear and gets a schoolboy for 2.  Edge rolls through a rebound cross body for 2.  Mysterio hits the flip bulldog for 2.  Mysterio goes up top.  Edge tries to cut him off.  Mysterio headbutts him down and tries a rana.  Edge catches him with a sit-out powerbomb for 2.  Edge tries another powerbomb, but Mysterio hits a rana and goes for the 619.  Edge catches his legs and locks in the Edgecator!  Mysterio turns it into a cradle for 2.  Mysterio avoids the spear.  Edge rallies and hits it on the second try, but Mysterio kicks out!  Mysterio hits the 619 and the springboard splash.  Edge kicks out at 2!  Mysterio hits a headscissors and another 619.  He comes off  the top, but Edge cuts him down midair with a spear for the pin in 31:30.  Edge retains the title.  Good match, especially the final Edge/Mysterio segment.  Alberto Del Rio appears and attacks Edge!  Del Rio locks on the cross armbreaker.  CHRISTIAN returns to make the save~!  Christian beats the piss out of Del Rio in revenge for Del Rio putting him out of action several months ago.  Christian hits the Killswitch!  After Christian leaves, Edge spears Del Rio.

WrestleMania hype video.

Matt Striker interviews Jerry “The King” Lawler.

Oakland!

Booker T goes into the ring to introduce a special guest, someone who will be a trainer on Tough Enough: Trish Stratus!  They banter a bit.  She rips off The Rock’s “Finally” catchphrase and Booker’s “Sucka,” which prompts Booker to bust out the “She didn’t say that.”  Booker asks why she’s here tonight.  She says she’s here to see Lawler win the title.  Booker finishes with the “Can you dig that?”  Well, this was pretty pointless.

The Chaperone trailer.  Yes, they’re wasting PPV time with this shit.

WWE Tag Team Championship Match: Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov (c) (w/ Tamina) vs. Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater of The Corre (w/ Ezekiel Jackson).  Kozlov and Santino throw Slater around a bit.  Slater cuts Santino off.  Corre work over Santino.  Kozlov tags in and throws Gabriel around.  Gabriel drops Kozlov with a head kick and tags in Slater.  Slater hits a wonky slingshot splash for 2.  Corre get the heat on Kozlov.  Santino gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Santino hits the Cobra on Gabriel, then gets a 2 count on Slater.  Corre cut off Santino.  Santino avoids an Eddie hilo from Gabriel and tags in Kozlov.  Kozlov smashes Gabriel and pummels him with headbutts.  Slater makes a blind tag and gives Kozlov a reverse DDT.  Gabriel tags in and hits the 450 splash on Kozlov for the pin in 5:10.  This sucked, but it got the belts off of Santino and Kozlov, so it accomplished something.

Hall of Fame hype video.

Todd Grisham interviews WWE Champion The Miz (w/ Alex Riley).

Vickie Guerrero comes out to be sad and obnoxious.  She whines about Dolph Ziggler being fired from Smackdown.  Teddy Long comes out and tells her the stuff it.  Vickie begs him to rehire Dolph.  Teddy says he is in a hiring mood.  Vickie is happy until Teddy reveals that he’s not hiring Dolph, he’s rehired Kelly Kelly.  Bad call, Teddy.  Kelly goes after Vickie, who tries running away, then tries to make friends.  Kelly kicks her ass.  Michelle McCool and Layla attack Kelly.  Trish Stratus comes and runs off LayCool.  They sneak back and cheap shot her.  Trish kicks their asses.  McCool takes a Chick Kick.  Layla gets a horribly botches Stratusphere.  Trish ends with a double Stratusfaction.  Trish and Kelly celebrate.

Miz/Lawler hype video.

WWE Championship Match: The Miz (c) (w/ Alex Riley) vs. Jerry “The King” Lawler.  They lock up.  Lawler gets a schoolboy for 2.  Miz beats on Lawler.  Lawler gets a backslide for 2.  Lawler gets an inside cradle for 2.  Miz grabs a side headlock and hits a shoulder block.  Lawler hits a short lariat for 2.  Lawler hits a shoulder block and a cross body block for 2.  Lawler lands some fucking great punches, then clotheslines Miz out of the ring.  Riley distracts Lawler, allowing Miz to send him into the post.  Miz puts Lawler on the apron and hits a knee lift.  Cover gets 2.  Miz goes to work on Lawler.  Riley gets in a cheap shot behind the referee’s back.  Cover gets 2.  Miz hits the running clothesline to the corner, then goes up top.  Lawler cuts him off and hits a superplex that was damn near a brainbuster for 2.  They trade punches.  That’s a game Miz is not going to win.  Lawler lands a couple of dropkicks and hits a fist drop for 2.  Riley trips Lawler behind the referee’s back.  The referee tells Riley to get the F out!  Lawler avoids Miz in the corner and gets a schoolboy for 2.  Lawler goes for the piledriver!  Miz slips out and boots Lawler in the face for 2.  Lawler turns it into a crucifix hold for 2!  Lawler low bridges Miz out of the ring.  Cole yells at Lawler.  Miz takes advantage of the distraction and rams Lawler’s head into the announce table.  Lawler avoids it the second time and smashes Miz’s face into the table, then throws him over the table into Cole!  Back inside, Lawler goes up top and hits a diving punch for 2.  At least Cole has shut the hell up for a bit.  Lawler counters the Skull Crushing Finale.  Miz hits the backbreaker.  Lawler counts the neckbreaker that follows and hits a DDT!  Lawler goes up top and lowers the strap!  Diving fist drop!  Miz gets his foot on the bottom rope at 2.  Lawler goes for the piledriver, but Miz backdrops him and lands on top for 2.  Lawler turns it into a sunset flip for 2.  Miz kicks Lawler in the head and hits the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin in 12:09.  Very good match.  Cole gets in the ring to celebrate with Miz.  After they leave, Lawler gets a much deserved standing ovation.

2/21/11!  That’s tomorrow!  What’s gonna happen?

John Cena eats Fruity Pebbles backstage.  Todd Grisham comes in to ask him about The Rock, but he no-sells it and talks about the Elimination Chamber.  He says he fells “Yabba dabba delicious.”  Seriously.

Matt Striker interview CM Punk.

Another WrestleMania hype video.  As usual, the theme song is fucking horrible.

Highlights of the Smackdown Chamber match from earlier tonight.

Elimination Chamber Match to determine the #1 Contender for the WWE Championship: Randy Orton vs. R-Truth vs. CM Punk vs. John Cena vs. King Sheamus vs. John Morrison.  Sheamus and Morrison lock up.  Sheamus lands a shoulder block.  Sheamus takes Morrison down with a side headlock takeover a few times, then slaps Morrison.  Morrison takes him down and pounds on him.  Sheamus rolls to the outside.  Morrison hits him with a dive.  Morrison tries the Flying Chuck, misses, and hits it off of the cage.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Sheamus drops Morrison with a short lariat and commences to putting a beating on him.  Morrison drops Sheamus with a kick and goes for the Starship Pain, but Sheamus recovers and pushes him to the outside.  Sheamus beats on Morrison.  Orton enters the match and runs wild.  Orton throws Morrison through one of the pods.  So we’re playing that game again, are we.  Orton gives Sheamus the DDT OF MURDER on the steel floor!  Orton puts the boots to his downed opponents.  Orton hits a superplex on Morrison for 2.  Orton hits a superplex on Sheamus for 2.  Miz and Riley are shown watching backstage.  Punk enters the match, but gets stuck in the door because it won’t open.  Orton is standing right there waiting.  He says “fuck it” and starts pounding on him.  Orton throws Punk into the ring and hits the RKO for the pin in 9:00.  iBooker dings in.  Cole reads that Punk didn’t have a fair chance, so he’s back in the match and allowed to reenter his pod for some reason.  Orton is pissed and beats up Sheamus.  Sheamus hits the Irish Curse for 2.  Morrison beats up Sheamus.  Sheamus sends him outside and poses.  He sets up Orton for the Razor’s Edge, but Orton slips out and goes for the RKO.  Sheamus counters and avoids the brogue kick.  Morrison drops Orton with the Flying Chuck.  Sheamus beats up Morrison.  Cena enters the match and is immediately attacked in his pod by Sheamus.  Cena rallies and tries to give Morrison the Attitude Adjustment out of the ring.  Morrison lands on his feet.  A minute later, Cena does it again and gets it right.  Sheamus hits Cena and Morrison with a slingshot shoulder block to the outside.  Orton and Sheamus brawl.  Orton hits a knee drop for 2.  Sheamus drops Orton and throws Cena and Morrison back into the ring.  R-Truth enters the match and is met by Sheamus.  Truth avoids the shot and beats down Sheamus in the pod.  Sheamus takes a hip toss onto the floor, which had to suck.  Truth runs wild in the ring.  Sheamus comes back in and kills Truth with the brogue kick for the pin in 17:32.  Morrison beats on Sheamus.  Orton throws Morrison through the glass again.  Orton and Cena brawl.  Orton drops him with a dropkick for 2.  Punk enters the match again.  Orton lies in wait.  Cena tries to give Orton the Attitude Adjustment, but Orton counters with the RKO on the floor.  Sheamus hits Orton with the brogue kick.  Punk drops Sheamus with a high kick, then covers Orton for 2.  In the ring, Punk humps the mat to mock Orton, then hits the Go 2 Sleep for the pin in 21:34.  Punk runs around attack people until he’s dropped by Sheamus.  Morrison beats up Sheamus and climbs to the top of a pod.  Sheamus trips him and climps up there with him for some damn reason.  Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge, but Morrison counters and kicks him down to the mat.  Morrison climbs along the roof of the cage and comes down onto Sheamus with a cross body for the pin in 25:18.  Cena makes his comeback on Punk and goes for the Attitude Adjustment on the floor.  Morrison dives onto both of them to prevent that from happening.  Punk covers Cena for 2.  Cena avoids the running knee strike and Morrison puts himself through the glass.  He really likes going through that glass.  Punk goes to work on Cena and locks in a figure-four headscissors.  Cena stands up with Punk on his shoulders.  Morrison comes off the top rope with a Doomsday Device clothesline!  Cover gets 2.  Morrison covers Cena for 2 for good measure.  Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment on Morrison.  Punk kills Cena with a high kick.  Punk dives to the outside to take out Cena.  Cover gets 2.  Punk catapults Cena into one of the pods.  He tries to do the same to Morrison, who catches himself and hits the Flying Chuck off the cage.  Morrison goes for the Starship Pain, but Punk avoids it and hits the Go 2 Sleep for the pin in 32:52.  Cena gives Punk the Attitude Adjustment onto the floor for the pin in 33:12.  Enjoyable match.

Fun, enjoyable, solid show.

WWE Superstars 2/17/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 30, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, Superstars open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Jack Korpela and Matt Striker are the first announcers.  Tonight, a replay of the Rock promo from Raw!  Tony Chimel is the first ring announcer.

Chris Masters vs. Tyler Reks.  Reks wins the lock up.  Masters shoves him.  Reks hides behind the referee and gets in a cheap shot.  Masters rallies and goes for the Master Lock.  Reks rallies and goes into ass kicking mode.  Reks hits a short lariat for 2.  Reks applies a Dragon sleeper.  Masters kicks his way free.  Reks hits a Final Cut for 2.  Reks puts a beating on Masters.  Masters back body drops Reks to the floor.  Reks pulls Master’s head across the top rope.  Masters hits a Samoan Drop and makes his comeback.  Masters hits a sit-out spinebuster for 2.  Reks comes off the top and gets caught in the Master Lock.  Masters gets the referee stop win in 4:40.  Good little match with a surprising result.

Tonight, Zack Ryder & Primo take on WWE Tag Team Champions Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov!

WWE.com plug.

Scott Stanford and Josh Matthews are now the announcers.  Justin Roberts is now the ring announcer.

David Hart Smith & Yoshi Tatsu vs. Jimmy & Jey Uso.  This match again?  Jey and Smith start.  Smith goes for a Kimura, but gets countered.  Smith gets a jackknife hold for 2.  Smith hits a belly to belly suplex for 2.  Smith goes a cartwheel to the corner and tags in Yoshi.  Jimmy tags in on the other side.  Jimmy works Yoshi over.  Yoshi rallies, hits some arm drags, send Jimmy out of the ring, and takes him out with a dive.  Insta-commercials.  Usos cut Yoshi off and get the heat on him.  Yoshi mows Jimmy down with a spin kick and makes the hot tag.  Smith runs wild and hits Jey with a sit-out powerbomb.  Jimmy saves.  Clusterfuck ensues.  The Usos pull the switcheroo.  Jimmy sends Smith into the turnbuckles, then schoolboys him and grabs a handful of trunks for the pin (about 6 1/2 minutes shown).  It was fine.

Still to come, Ryder & Primo vs. Santino & Kozlov!

Up next, Rock on tape!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

They show about 12 minutes of The Rock’s promo from Raw.

The main event is NEXT!

Non-Title: WWE Tag Team Champions Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov (w/ Tamina) vs. Zack Ryder & Primo.  Santino and Ryder fuck around a bit.  Santino does the headlock –> shoulder block bit.  Ryder and Primo try to cut Santino off and work his arm.  Santino causes a friendly fire incident between the heels and regains the initiative.  They champs work over Ryder.  Ryder drops Santino with a backdrop suplex and tags out.  Santino throws Primo around, goes for the falling headbutt, and meets knees.  The heels cut off Santino.  Insta-commercials.  The heels get the heat on Santino.  Kozlov gets the hot tag and gets cut off.  Santino tags back in.  Kozlov finally runs wild.  Santino hits Primo with the Cobra for the pin (6:34 shown).  There ya go.  The champs celebrate.

Okay show this week.

WWE Superstars 2/10/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 19, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, Superstars open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Scott Stanford and Josh Matthews are the first announcers.  Tonight, Jack Swagger vs. Trent Barreta!  Justin Roberts is the first ring announcer.

Natalya vs. Alicia Fox.  Natalya takes Fox down to the mat with a side headlock.  Fox escapes.  Natalya clamps on another headlock.  Natalya goes for the Sharpshooter, but Fox gets the ropes to escape.  They lock up again.  Fox beats up Natalya.  Natalya applies a surfboard, then turns it into a pinning predicament for 2.  Fox pulls Natalya’s head over the top rope and goes back to work on her.  Fox applies a body scissors.  Natalya turns it into a bear hug.  Fox escapes and goes for a backdrop suplex, but fails.  Double clothesline spot.  Natalya hits a butterfly suplex and makes her comeback.  Natalya botches a Jackhammer for 2.  Natalya takes Fox down by the leg and locks in the Sharpshooter for the win in 6:36.  This kind of sucked.

Up next, Raw clips!

Raw clips.

Tonight, Swagger vs. Barreta!

WWE.com plug.

Handicap Match: Great Khali (w/ Ranjin Singh) vs. Jimmy & Jey Uso.  Typical “2 guys against an immobile giant” stuff.  Usos hit a double superkick for 2.  Khali makes is comeback and hits the tree slam on Jimmy for the pin in 2:00.  Whatever.

Tonight, Swagger vs. Barreta!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Jack Korpela and Matt Striker are now the announcers.

Elimination Chamber hype video.

Tony Chimel is now the ring announcer.

Tyler Reks is in action NEXT!

They show Reks turning on Curt Hawkins last week.

Tyler Reks vs. Curt Hawkins.  Hawkins shoves Reks.  Reks boots him to death in the face and pounds on him.  Hawkins lands an elbow smash and makes his comeback.  Hawkins hits a Michinoku Driver II for 2.  Hawkins counters out of a powerslam in a face plant for 2.  Hawkins goes up top.  Reks crotches him, gets  him in a fireman’s carry, and drops him across the top turnbuckle!  Reks hits the modified Burning Hammer for the pin in 3:21.  Fun little match.

Still to come, Swagger vs. Barreta!

Jack Swagger vs. Trent Barreta.  Swagger throws and slams Barreta around.  Barreta gets a sunset flip for 2.  Barreta gets a flying schoolboy for 2.  Swagger throws Barreta around some more.  Swagger hits the Vader Bomb for 2.  Swagger applies an arm hold.  Barreta tries to make his comeback, but misses an enzuigiri.  Swagger locks in the ankle lock for the win in 2:54.  Fun while it lasted.

The first half sucked, second half wasn’t too bad.

WWE Superstars 2/3/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 18, 2011 by Grappleholic

Superstars open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Scott Stanford and Josh Matthews are the first announcers.  Tonight, JTG & Trent Barreta take on Tyler Reks & Curt Hawkins!  Justin Roberts is the first ring announcer.

Zack Ryder and Primo come out and cut a promo about being undefeated as a tag team.

Zack Ryder & Primo vs. David Hart Smith & Yoshi Tatsu.  Primo and Yoshi start with pro wrestling goodness.  Yoshi hits an arm drag and lands some chops.  Smith tags in and hits a powerslam for 2.  Primo boots Smith in the face and tags in Ryder.  Ryder and Smith do a nice wrestling exchange.  Primo and Yoshi tag in and go at it again with a chop exchange.  Yoshi knocks Ryder off the apron with a big chop.  Primo suplexes Yoshi out of the ring.  Ryder drops him.  Smith checks on  Yoshi.  Insta-commercials.  Heels get the heat on Yoshi for a while.  Smith gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Stall jackhammer on Ryder.  Primo saves.  Clusterfuck ensues.  Yoshi takes out Primo with a dive.  Yoshi tags in and runs wild on Ryder.  Yoshi drops Ryder with a high kick for the pin (8:31 shown).  Good little match.

Chaperone trailer.  Ugh.

WWE.com plug.

Melina vs. Tamina.  Melina begs off, then bails.  The cheap shots Tamina and hides in the ropes.  Tamina grabs her legs and catapults her.  Melina completely misses the corner.  Tamina beats up Melina some more.  Melina claims that she broke her nose, but she’s playing possum.  She beats up Tamina.  Melina applies a weird Dragon sleeper/abdominal stretch thing.  Tamina escapes and hits a backbreaker.  Tamina makes her comeback.  Melina pulls Tamina’s head across the top rope.  Cover gets 2.  Melina hits the Sunset Split for the pin in 4:56.  Meh.

Tonight, JTG & Barreta vs. Reks & Hawkins!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Alberto Del Rio hype video.

Jack Korpela and Matt Striker are now the announcers.

Raw Rebound.

Tony Chimel is now the ring announcer.

The main event is NEXT!

JTG & Trent Barreta vs. Curt Hawkins & Tyler Reks.  Hawkins and Barreta lock up and renew their rivalry.  Reks and JTG tag in.  Reks slams JTG around.  Hawkins tags in.  JTG boots him in the face for 2.  Hawkins knocks JTG off the apron to the floor.  Insta-commercials.  Heels get the heat on JTG for a while.  JTG weathers the storm, flapjacks Hawkins, and makes the hot tag to Barreta.  Barreta runs wild.  Hawkins cuts him off and hits a backdrop flapjack type thing for 2.  Hawkins knocks JTG off the apron and goes up top.  Barreta crotches him.  JTG takes out Reks at ringside.  Hawkins pushes Barreta off the top rope and hits the diving elbow drop for the pin (10:18 shown).  Fine little match.  Reks jumps Hawkins and gives him the modified Burning Hammer.  How dastardly!

Okay show.

WWE Royal Rumble 2011

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 25, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, cool PPV open, pyro and ballyhoo.  We are LIVE from Boston!  Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Todd Grisham are the announcers.  Tony Chimel and Justin Roberts are the ring announcers.

World Heavyweight Championship Match: Edge (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vickie Guerrero).  Edge can’t use the spear because Vickie is a bitch.  She comes out to remind us of that in her nails on a chalkboard voice.  She then chants “spear” and cackles.  She then introduces Ziggler.  Chimel gives in ring intros.  They lock up.  Edge lands some punches and puts a beating on Ziggler.  Edge hits a gut buster for 2.  Edge connects with a knee lift for 2.  Ziggler rolls to the apron.  Edge slips out, pulls him down face first onto the apron, then throws him into the barricade.  Ziggler catches Edge with a shot on the way back into the ring and hits a neckbreaker for 2.  Ziggler puts a beating on Edge and applies a rear chin lock.  Afterward, Ziggler hits a diving sunset flip.  Edge rolls through and catapults him into the corner for 2.  Ziggler always takes that like a champ.  Ziggler hits a neckbreaker for 2.  Ziggler hits the Perfect neck snap for 2, then reapplies the rear chin lock.  Edge takes a bump off the apron into the barricade.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Back to the chin lock.  Edge fights out.  Double cross body spot.  Edge avoids a charge in the corner and Ziggler eats turnbuckle again.  Edge hits a flapjack and gets the momentum going.  Weird faceplant thing gets 2.  Ziggler hits a chin breaker for 2.  Ziggler goes for the Fameasser, but Edge turns it into a powerbomb for 2.  Edge goes up top.  Ziggler cuts him off and goes for a superplex.  Edge fights him off and hits a diving cross body.  Ziggler rolls through for 2.  Ziggler lands a dropkick for 2.  Ziggler goes for the Zig Zag, but Edge holds into the ropes to avoid it.  Edge locks in the Edgeucator.  Haven’t seen that one in years.  Ziggler reaches the ropes.  Ziggler avoids a charge against the ropes, then hits the Fameasser for 2.  Edge drops Ziggler with a big boot.  He teases going for the spear, then realizes he can’t.  Ziggler goes for the sleeper.  Edge counters and hits the Edgecution.  Vickie grabs the referee to stop the count.  Vickie screams at Edge and slaps him.  Ziggler almost collides with Vickie.  Edge cradles him for 2.  Vickie slaps at Edge some more.  Shouldn’t that be a DQ, referee moron?  Kelly Kelly comes out, yanks Vickie off the apron, and kicks her ass.  Ziggler hits the Zig Zag for 2.  Ziggler locks in the sleeper hold.  Edge manages to stand up.  They collide with the referee.  Edge hits a backpack stunner.  With Vickie and the referee dead, Edge says “fuck it” and hits the spear, then does the old Eddie Guerrero “play dead” trick.  The referee wakes up.  Edge gives a nod to his old buddy Christian and hits the Killswitch for the pin in 20:46.  Pretty decent match.

WrestleMania commercial.

Boston!

Miz/Orton hype video.

Josh Matthews interviews WWE Champion The Miz and Alex Riley.

WWE Championship Match: The Miz (c) (w/ Alex Riley) vs. Randy Orton.  Orton beats down Miz in the corner, then chucks him out of the ring and kicks his ass at ringside.  Back inside, Orton beats the shit out of Miz some more.  Riley interferes behind the referee’s back to allow Miz to get the advantage.  Miz hits the corner clothesline for 2.  Miz finds his stride and gets the heat going on Orton.  Orton goes for a sleeper hold.  Miz counters and goes for a German suplex.  Orton counters and hits a backdrop suplex.  Miz lands a big boot for 2.  Miz goes up top.  Orton crotches him and hits a superplex for 2.  They trade punches.  Orton hits some clotheslines and the 3.0.  Miz rolls to the apron.  Orton goes for the DDT OF MURDER, but Miz back body drops him the floor.  Riley puts the boots to Orton behind the referee’s back.  Back inside, Miz covers for 2.  Miz hits a diving double axe handle for 2.  Miz stretches Orton’s neck with a chin lock.  On the outside, Miz catapults Orton into the post.  Orton barely beats the count back into the ring and immediately tackle punches Miz.  Orton gives Miz the Garvin Stomp and a knee drop for 2.  Orton goes for a powerbomb.  Riley distracts him.  Miz hits the backbreaker/neckbreaker for 2.  They counter each others’ finish.  Orton hits the Angle Slam for 2.  Miz bails, grabs the belt, and tries to leave.  Orton clotheslines him and throws him back into the ring.  Cover gets 2.  Orton ducks a basement kick and schoolboys Miz for 2.  Miz bails to the apron.  Orton hits the DDT OF MURDER and humps the mat.  The 4 lesser members of the New Nexus come out.  The referee goes to tell them to leave.  Riley tries to attack Orton, but Orton tosses him out of the ring and onto Nexus.  Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale, but Orton counters and hits the RKO.  CM Punk appears and gives Orton the Go 2 Sleep, then puts Miz on top of Orton.  Miz gets the pin in 19:50.  Good match.  Cole mizzes his pants again.

Elimination Chamber commercial.

Todd Grisham reads a statement from “Dashing’ Cody Rhodes.  They show Rhodes getting his face broken by Rey Mysterio 2 weeks ago on Smackdown.

A bunch of fans give their Royal Rumble picks.  One guy actually picks Santino Marella.  I LOL’d.

We’re now set for a handicap match for the Divas Championship.  The iBooker dings in.  Cole reads that it will now be a Fatal Four-Way Match.  Eve Torres comes out to join Natalya and LayCool.

Fatal Four-Way Match for the WWE Divas Championship: Natalya (c) vs. Michelle McCool vs. Layla vs. Eve Torres.  They pair off and brawl.  LayCool work together.  They actually hit a double Stroke on Eve.  I’ll keep my dirty comments to myself.  Natalya fights back and catapults Layla into McCool.  Cover on Layla, but McCool pulls her to safety.  LayCool end up face to face in the ring with both of the babyfaces down outside.  Natalya trips Layla.  Eve schoolgirls McCool.  Clusterfuck ensues.  Natalya and Eve go at it.  Layla intervenes.  Natalya puts them in a double Sharpshooter.  McCool drops Natalya with a kick.  McCool covers Eve for 2.  Eve gets an inside cradle on McCool.  Layla saves.  Layla gives Eve the Lay Out.  Eve rolls to the floor.  Natalya makes her comeback on LayCool.  Natalya hits a Michinoku Driver II on McCool.  Layla saves.  Natalya beats her up in the corner.  McCool accidentally boots Layla in the face.  Natalya schoolgirls McCool for 2, then throws her outside.  Eve throws out Natalya, then hits a moonsault press on Layla.  McCool schoolgirls Natalya at the same time, but the referee doesn’t see and counts Eve’s pin over Layla in 5:12.  Eve regains the title.  Any match with a moonsault press finish gains points with me.

Josh Matthews interviews WWE United States Champion Daniel Bryan (w/ Gail Kim).  The Bella Twins interrupt to apologize for last week.  They start arguing and a catfight breaks out.  Bryan gets slapped again.

WrestleMania commercial.

Boston!

Rumble “By The Numbers” video.

Justin Roberts gives us our annual explanation of how the Royal Rumble works.  I miss Howard Finkel.

CM Punk comes out as #1.  The Corre come out and jump Punk.  The New Nexus come out to save their master.  The Nexus and The Corre brawl.  iBooker dings in at the same time I get a text message on my iPhone.  That always trips me out.  Cole calls for the officials to restore order and orders everyone but Punk to the back.  And NOW it’s Rumble time!

Royal Rumble Match: #1 is CM Punk.  #2 is WWE United States Champion Daniel Bryan.  They lock up.  Punk grabs a side headlock and lands a shoulder block.  Punk does a drop down.  Bryan catches him with a dropkick, then lands a clothesline.  They fail to eliminate each other.  Bryan hits a missile dropkick.  Punk avoids a charge in the corner.  #3 is Justin Gabriel.  He immediately goes after Punk.  Punk sends him to the apron.  Punk and Bryan clothesline each other.  Gabriel says “fuck it” and goes for the 450 splash.  Punk avoids it.  Bryan backdrops Gabriel out of the ring to eliminate him.  #4 Zack Ryder.  He runs wild and hits face washes on Bryan and Punk.  Bryan elevates Ryder, who hits Punk with the Rough Ryder.  Bryan hip tosses Ryder out of the ring.  Bryan lands some kicks on Punk.  They fight over eliminating each other again.  #5 is William Regal!  Regal mauls some fuckers.  It’s awesome.  Regal blasts Punk with the knee trembler.  Bryan and Regal trade European uppercuts.  Punk drops Regal with a head kick.  Bryan drops Punk with a head kick, then gives Regal another head kick just to make sure he’s good and dead.  #6 is Ted Dibiase Jr. (w/ Maryse).  Dibiase runs wild briefly.  Bryan kicks Regal to death some more while Dibiase tries to eliminate Punk.  Bryan tries to eliminate Dibiase, but fails.  #7 John Morrison.  Morrison runs wild.  Flying Chuck to Punk.  C4 to Bryan.  Regal knocks Morrison off the apron.  Morrison grabs onto the barricade, walks along it, and leaps to the steps!  Dibiase eliminates Regal.  Morrison drops Regal with a kick for good measure.  His feet never touched the ground, so he’s still in the Rumble!  #8 is Yoshi Tatsu!  Yoshi brawls with Dibiase and Punk while Morrison beats up Bryan in the corner.  Morrison lands on his feet from a German suplex attempt by Bryan.  #9 Husky Harris.  He attacks everyone and guards Punk.  Punk gives Bryan a backdrop suplex.  #10 is Chavo Guerrero Jr.  Chavo gets his moment to run wild.  He hits Two Amigos on everybody, but only manages to complete the 3 on Bryan.  Chavo hits Harris with a missile dropkick.  #11 is Mark Henry!  Somebody gone get they ass kicked!  Henry eliminates Chavo.  Yoshi tries to chop Henry to no avail.  Henry clotheslines Yoshi out of the ring.  Boo!  Punk and Harris beat down Henry.  #12 is JTG.  He gets his moment to shine.  Harris tries to eliminate Bryan.  #13 is Michael McGillicutty, so there are three New Nexus guys in now.  McGillicutty eliminates JTG.  Everybody brawls.  Harris and McGillicutty back body drop Dibiase to the floor.  #14 is Chris Masters.  He goes after Nexus, which isn’t that bright, because there are three of them.  He hits a spinebuster on McGillicutty, then gets Punk in the Master Lock and tries to eliminate him.  McGillicutty saves Punk and stomps on Masters in the corner.  #15 is David Otunga.  Four Nexus guys in.  Punk (I think) eliminates Bryan.  Boo!  Nexus eliminates Masters and Morrison.  I think I missed Dibiase getting eliminated somewhere.  Nexus team up to dump Henry.  It’s all Nexus now.  #16 is Tyler Reks.  He charges right in like an idiot.  Nexus beats him down.  Punk drops him with a head kick and eliminates him.  #17 is WWE Tag Team Champion Vladimir Kozlov.  Nexus beat him down.  Punk tosses him.  #18 is R-Truth.  Another Nexus beatdown.  Another elimination by Punk.  Why don’t these guys just wait for a few more entrants to come in so they have a fighting chance?  #19 is Great Khali (w/ Ranjin Singh)!  Khali beats up everybody.  Khali eliminates Harris.  Punk begs off.  Khali beats him up.  #20 is Mason Ryan.  We’re back to having four Nexus guys.  Ryan and Khali brawl.  Ryan eliminates Khali!  #21 is BOOKER T!  Big pop for Booker.  Ryan immediately jumps him.  Booker rallies and runs wild.  Ryan gets a Harlem side kick.  Otunga gets a scissors kick.  McGillicutty gets a Book End.  The epic return of the SPINAROONIE!  Punk attacks Booker.  Booker tries to eliminate him.  Ryan saves Punk and tosses Booker.  Aww.  #22 is John Cena!  Cena runs wild on Nexus.  Cena low bridges Ryan out of the ring, then clotheslines Otunga and McGillicutty to the floor.  Punk’s all alone now!  They go at it.  Cena counters the Go 2 Sleep.  They do a double clothesline spot.  #23 is… Hornswoggle.  Fucking Hornswoggle.  Punk knocks him down and goes back after Cena.  Cena eliminates Punk with the Attitude Adjustment out of the ring.  All of that build just for Super Cena to eliminate all of Nexus?  Cena and Hornswoggle are working together now.  #24 is Tyson Kidd.  Cena and Hornswoggle double team him.  Of course I’m serious.  Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment.  He helps Horswoggle hit one as well.  Tyson is probably seriously rethinking his career choice right now.  Cena dumps Kidd.  #25 is Heath Slater.  Cena gives him shoulder blocks.  Hornswoggle gives Slater a stunner.  Cena and Hornswoggle do a double Five Knuckle Shuffle.  So a Ten Knuckle Shuffle?  Hornswoggle hits the tadpole splash.  Cena tosses Slater.  #26 is WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston.  Cena and Kofi look up at the big WrestleMania sign, then lock up.  Kofi leapfrogs Cena and connects with an elbow.  Kofi hits corner punches.  Cena hits a clothesline.  #27 is Jack Swagger.  Swagger runs wild.  He’s not playing nice.  Swagger hits Vader Bombs on Cena and Kingston.  Swagger stalks Hornswoggle after he starts some shit.  Kofi hits Swagger with a diving cross body.  Kingston uses Hornswoggle as a springboard to hit the Boom Drop.  #28 is Sheamus!  Sheamus beats up everyone.  Hornswoggle wants to fight.  Sheamus casually shoves him down.  Hornswoggle hits Sweet Shin Music.  Sheamus tries to toss him, but is saved by Cena.  Hornswoggle goes for the tadpole splash, but Sheamus recovers and eliminates him with the brogue kick.  Thank God.  #29 is Rey Mysterio Jr.  Mysterio runs wild and hits lots of flippy twirly moves.  He goes for the 619 on Swagger, but Sheamus cuts him off.  Kofi hits Sheamus with the Trouble In Paradise.  Mysterio sends Swagger to the apron, then eliminates him with the 619.  #30 is Wade Barrett.  Barrett beats up everyone.  #31 is Dolph Ziggler.  So he gets a title shot and a Rumble spot?  He looks sore from earlier, but he sucks it up and beats up everyone.  There are a few near eliminations.  #32 is DIESEL!  Motherfucking Diesel!  The crowd LOVES him.  Diesel runs wild in his slow, plodding way.  A fucking “DIESEL!” chant in 2011!  #33 is Drew McIntyre.  McIntyre and Sheamus beat down Diesel, who the crowd still LOVES.  Mysterio finally gets revenge for that lawn dart thing and hits Diesel with a 619.  Barrett and Diesel brawl.  Sheamus and McIntyre are working together.  #34 is Alex Riley (w/ WWE Champion The Miz).  Cole marks out.  Diesel misses a big boot, crotches himself, and gets eliminated by Barrett.  The crowd DOES NOT like that.  Cole does like it when Miz joins the commentary team.  #35 is The Big Show.  He and Diesel stare at each other in the aisle.  Show hits the ring and runs wild.  Show chokeslams Barrett, then tosses Ziggler.  #36 is Ezekiel Jackson.  Show eliminates Ziggler.  Zeke runs wild and eliminates Big Show!  Zeke kicks ass.  He and Barrett work together.  #37 is WWE Tag Team Champion Santino Marella.  Marella tries to beat up Zeke.  Zeke yells at him.  Sheamus drops Santino the the brogue kick.  Santino rolls under the bottom rope to the floor.  Zeke and Barrett try to eliminate Cena.  #38 is Alberto Del Rio, introduced by Ricardo Rodriguez.  He’s in no hurry to get in the ring.  #39 is Randy Orton.  He attacks Del Rio in the aisle and throws him into the steps, then into the ring.  RKOs to Del Rio, Sheamus, and Kofi.  Orton tosses Kofi, then clotheslines Sheamus out of the ring.  Orton and Sheamus face off.  #40 is Kane.  He runs wild until he’s cut off by Big Zeke.  Kane low bridges Zeke out of the ring.  Mysterio eliminates Kane.  Barrett eliminates Mysterio.  Final four are Cena, Barrett, Del Rio, and Orton.  They pair off and brawl.  Cena and Orton beat up the heels, then face off again.  They brawl.  They counters each others’ finishes.  Barrett attacks Cena again.  Barrett beats up Orton while Del Rio beats up Cena.  Cena gives Del Rio the Attitude Adjustment.  Alex Riley comes back.  Cena decks him.  Miz sneaks in and eliminates Cena!  Cena is pissed.  Barrett and Del Rio beat down Orton.  Orton makes his comeback.  Powerslam on Barrett.  3.0 on Del Rio.  Orton humps the mat.  Orton eliminates Barrett.  Del Rio dumps Orton to win the Rumble in 1:08:42.  BUT WAIT!  SANTINO IS UP!  And he was never eliminated!  Santino hits the Cobra!  Santino dances around like a goof.  Del Rio throws him out to win the Rumble for real in 1:09:54.  Ricardo goes crazy.  Funniest Rumble finish ever!  Del Rio points at the WrestleMania sign as some pyro goes off behind it.  Ricardo keeps yelling “ALBERTO DEL RIO!”  Awesome.

Good show.  The Rumble is always good times.