Archive for King of the Ring Tournament

WWE Monday Night Raw 11/29/10

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 7, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open, video of what went down last week, Raw open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and CM Punk are the announcers.  We are LIVE in Philadelphia for King of the Ring!  Tonight, WWE Champion The Miz will be here!

They show the king’s throne on the stage.

Alex Riley comes out SUITED UP!  Punk gets in a jab about Riley being dressed for court.  Riley makes reference to it himself, saying he’s not afraid of a party.  Riley rants and raves about how awesome The Miz is.

Justin Roberts is the ring announcer.  He introduces Ricardo Rodriguez (sporting a black eye from Smackdown) to introduce Alberto Del Rio.  They show a shot of the announcers and Punk can be seen wearing a Colt Cabana t-shirt.

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: Alberto Del Rio vs. WWE United States Champion Daniel Bryan.  They lock up.  Del Rio backs Bryan into the corner, breaks, and cheap shots him.  Del Rio works a side headlock on the mat.  Bryan turns it into a cradle in one of my favorite spots.  Del Rio hits a shoulder block.  Bryan does the leapfrog, drop down, dropkick for 2.  Del Rio sends Bryan into the turnbuckles, then hits a spinebuster.  Bryan goes for the LeBell Lock, but Del Rio gets a rope break and bails.  Commercials.  Del Rio has Bryan in a rear chin lock.  He took over during the break when he knocked Bryan off the apron with an enzuigiri.  Del Rio throws Bryan to the mat and covers for 2.  Del Rio gets the heat on Bryan, reapplying his rear chin lock.  Bryan fights out, but Del Rio clubbers his back.  Del Rio hits a body slam and goes for some kind of diving spinning move, but Bryan avoids it.  Bryan gets a reverse cradle for 2.  Bryan gets a crucifix hold for 2.  Bryan lands some European uppercuts, then back flips over Del Rio from the corner.  They switch waist locks.  Bryan hits a nice German suplex hold for 2.  Bryan telegraphs a back body drop and gets kicked in the head.  Bryan reciprocates with a high kick and hits a corner dropkick for 2.  Bryan blasts Del Rio with kicks.  Del Rio hits a gorgeous German suplex hold of his own for 2.  Del Rio charges the ropes, but Bryan avoids him and hits a tope suicida.  Back inside, Bryan goes for a missile dropkick, but Del Rio avoids it.  Bryan has injured his shoulder.  Del Rio hits the Minoru Special for the submission in 9:40.  Really good little match.  Del Rio advances to face the winner of John Morrison/Cody Rhodes.

They show video of some previous King of the Ring winners: Edge (2001), Stone Cold Steve Austin (1996), Triple H (1997), Bret Hart (1991/1993), and Brock Lesnar (2002).  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

R-Truth raps his way out to cut a promo.  Why isn’t the next tournament match happening right now?  He talks about his friend John Cena being fired last week.  He challenges any member of Nexus to come out and face him one on one.

Josh Matthews goes to the Nexus locker room.  Wade Barrett sends out Michael McGillicutty, who is accepting the challenge.  He has on a new Nexus t-shirt.  McGillicutty heads for the arena, but his attacked by someone wearing jean shorts and purple arm bands…  Commercials…

Philadelphia!

The announcers talk about McGillicutty getting jumped.

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: “Dashing” Cody Rhodes vs. John Morrison.  They lock up.  Morrison lands a shoulder block.  He goes for a punch, but Rhodes flinches to protect his face, then goes on the attack.  Morrison avoids Rhodes in the corner and Rhodes hits his face on the turnbuckle pad.  Rhodes bails.  Morrison throws him back in and clotheslines him, then does a face rake with his boot.  Rhodes hits a clothesline and beats up Morrison.  Rhodes whips Morrison into the turnbuckles for 2.  Rhodes hits a knee lift and side Russian leg sweep for 2.  Rhodes hooks Morrison’s arms.  Morrison fights out, but Rhodes hooks them again.  Morrison makes his comeback and hits a side kick for 2.  Rhodes ducks the running knee and gets a schoolboy for 2.  Morrison avoids the Beautiful Disaster and hits the Flying Chuck (they are both the same move), then lands the running knee strike for the pin in 3:37.  Good little match, but short.

Tonight’s guest star is Miss USA, Rima Fakih!  Who?  Also tonight: The Miz!  Commercials!

WWE.com plug.

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: Drew McIntyre vs. Ezekiel Jackson.  Zeke wins the lock up easily and gives a clean break.  They lock up again.  McIntyre pushes Zeke into the corner.  Zeke is amused.  McIntyre slaps him.  Zeke is pissed and commences to kicking ass.  Zeke hits a corner clothesline and splash for 2.  McIntyre pulls Zeke’s head into a discreetly exposed turnbuckle.  Cover gets 2.  McIntyre beats on Zeke.  Zeke tackles him, sending them both through the ropes.  They brawl outside and both get counted out in 2:41.  Lame.  Zeke throws McIntyre back into the ring.  McIntyre goes for the Future Shock.  Zeke back body drops him and clotheslines him out of the ring.  Zeke wins a moral victory, but neither of them advance.  The winner of Sheamus/Kofi Kingston automatically advances to the final.  I’m calling it: the final will be Morrison vs. Sheamus.  Nothing else makes sense.

The Bella Twins check on the injured Daniel Bryan.  Alex Riley bitches at them about dancing girls, then talks to Miz on his douchebag bluetooth earpiece.  Riley talks shit to Bryan, saying that he could have been in Riley’s face.  Bryan says he’s doing fine.  Riley welcomes them to Mizfest 2010.  Commercials.

Philadelphia!

They show the video from last week, where Miz beat Randy Orton for the WWE Championship.

The announcers talk.  Lawler says Randy Orton will miss tonight’s show with a knee injury.

WWE Champion The Miz and Alex Riley come out.  WWE Champion The Miz… I’ve known for a while now that it was only a matter of time before I’d be typing that.  He shows pictures of the shocked and angry little girl in the crowd last week.  I’ve seen that picture everywhere.  Miz cuts his promo.  Miz’s promos are great, but I can’t transcribe promos.  I try to hit key points at best.  Jerry Lawler tires of hearing him babble and goes up from the announce table.  He disapproves of the way Miz backdoored into the title.  Cole gets up and bashes Lawler for bashing his crush.  Lawler says Miz should defend the title tonight.  Cole says Miz may make an example out of Lawler.  King says he’s been here since 1993 and has never had a WWE title match.  He challenges Miz to a title match tonight.  Miz pussies out.  Lawler says Miz isn’t awesome, he’s a coward.  Miz talks shit to Lawler.  The iBooker 9000 sends a text message to someone’s iPhone and gets massive heat.  Cole reads that it’ll be Miz vs. Lawler for the title tonight… in a Tables, Ladders, & Chairs Match!  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Tonight, Miz vs. Lawler in a TLC Match!

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: Sheamus vs. Kofi Kingston.  Sheamus goes on the attack.  They both take a bump out of the ring.  Sheamus throws Kofi back in.  Kofi gets the jump on him coming back in.  Sheamus hits the small penis uranage backbreaker for 2.  Sheamus beats on Kofi.  Kofi fights back with punches and kicks and makes his comeback.  Kofi hits the Boom Drop for 2.  Kofi springs to the corner, but Sheamus avoids him and goes for the Razor’s Edge.  Kofi slips out and hits the Trouble In Paradise.  Sheamus rolls to the apron.  Kofi tries to pull him back, but Sheamus grabs the ring skirt for dear life.  Kofi hits the pendulum kick and goes for a diving cross body.  Sheamus sort of catches him in midair with the brogue kick for the pin 4:04.  There wasn’t much to this.  Sheamus gets a BYE to the final.  Commercials.

Non-Title: Mark Henry & Yoshi Tatsu vs. WWE Tag Team Champions Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater of the Nexus.  Yoshi hits an arm drag and a dropkick on Gabriel for 2.  Gabriel hits a jawbreaker and tags out.  Nexus get the heat on Yoshi.  There’s a huge pop in the crowd as John Cena makes his way to the front row, tickets in hand.  Why does he have so many tickets?  Henry gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Henry squashes Slater with a big splash.  Gabriel saves.  Yoshi takes him out.  Slater catches Henry with a kick out of the corner, then goes for a diving cross body.  Henry catches him and hits the World’s Strongest Slam for the pin in 2:29.  Cena immediately jumps the barricade, takes the monitors off the announce table, and gives Slater the Attitude Adjustment through the table.  David Otunga and Husky Harris run out.  Cena bails through the crowd.

Tonight, Miz vs. Lawler in a TLC Match!  Next, Morrison vs. Del Rio!  Commercials!

Philadelphia!

They show the havoc John Cena has wrought tonight.

David Otunga, Husky Harris, and Justin Gabriel discuss Cena backstage.  Wade Barrett tells them they will deal with Cena.  He’s going to go call him out.

Jerry Lawler is getting ready for the match tonight.  Arn Anderson comes in and warns him about the danger of TLC matches.  Lawler isn’t passing up his title shot.  Arn wishes him luck.

Cole and Punk now have to sit behind a busted table.  Couldn’t they get them a plain table?  There are always plenty of them under the ring.

Justin Roberts again introduces Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio.  The semifinal is NEXT!  Commercials!

King of the Ring Tournament – Semifinal: Alberto Del Rio vs. John Morrison.  Del Rio goes on the attack and beats on Morrison.  Morrison catches Del Rio with a boot in the corner and hits a dropkick for 2.  Del Rio pulls Morrison’s arm across the top rope, then sets to work on it.  Morrison makes his comeback and hits a side kick for 2.  Del Rio hits a Codebreaker like move to the arm for 2.  Del Rio beats on Morrison.  Del Rio hits an enzuigiri.  His car horn starts honking.  Rey Mysterio is in Del Rio’s car!  Morrison hits Del Rio with the Flying Chuck for the pin in 3:24.  Fine little match.  Morrison vs. Sheamus is the final, just as I predicted.  Mysterio stands on top of Del Rio’s car.

They show video of tonight’s guest host, Rima Fakih, competing in beauty pageants.

Wade Barrett is headed our way!  Commercials!

WWE Rewind: John Cena costing Wade Barrett the WWE Championship last week.

Wade Barrett comes out to cut a promo.  He’s somehow the only person on the planet who can give John Cena a job.  He realizes Cena attacking Nexus is a ploy to incite Barrett to give him his job back, but he’s not falling for it.  John Cena appears on the TitanTron.  He looks to be behind the arena.  He said he’s just keeping his promise to take out the Nexus.  They talk about how inept WWE security is.  Justin Gabriel, David Otunga, and HuskyHarris corner Cena in the parking lot.  Cena reminds them that he’s not their only enemy.  Vladimir Kozlov, Ezekiel Jackson, David Hart Smith, Darren Young, Mark Henry, Yoshi Tatsu, and Daniel Bryan attack Nexus.  Cena throws Gabriel HEAD FIRST INTO A FUCKING CAR WINDOW.  FUCKING OUCH.  Cena gives Gabriel the Attitude Adjustment onto the car.  Cena says he’ll be back next week to continue attacking Nexus.  Geeze, Gabriel eating that car window looked NASTY.  Commercials.

Tonight, Miz vs. Lawler for the WWE Championship in a TLC Match!

They show the car fucked Justin Gabriel all up, then replay the attack on Nexus.

Maryse, Alicia Fox, & Tamina vs. WWE Divas Champion Natalya, Melina, & Gail Kim.  They show Tamina kissing Santino Marella last week.  Melina and Maryse argue.  Melina kicks her ass.  Maryse bails.  Melina chases her back into the ring and pulls her hair.  Maryse does something and covers for 2.  Fox tags in and very lightly attacks Melina.  Melina sunset flips Fox into her knees.  Santino Marella comes out playing a guitar and singing.  Tamina grabs Santino in a headlock and walks him to the back.  Maryse is like WTF?  Natalya tags in and runs wild on Fox.  Natalya goes for the Sharpshooter.  Gail takes her out.  Natalya locks Fox in the Sharpshooter for the win in 3:33.  Awful.

Awesome Jerry “The King” Lawler video package.

They show Lawler getting ready backstage.  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Ted Dibiase Jr. is playing with a toy WWE belt backstage.  The belt plays Triple H’s music.  I wonder if that is foreshadowing.  Maryse comes in to bitch at him for looking bad and making her look bad.  Dibiase finally tells her to SHUT UP!  Reminds me of the conversations I had with my ex-wife.

Husky Harris and David Otunga are slinking around backstage, discussing John Cena.

Josh Matthews interviews Sheamus and John Morrison.  The tournament final is NEXT!  Commercials!

Justin Roberts introduces the special guest ring announcer for this match: Rima Fakih.  She comes out to awful music, escorted by Santino for some reason, and does a horrible job of ring announcing.

King of the Ring Tournament – Final: Sheamus vs. John Morrison.  They lock up.  Sheamus goes after Morrison’s previously injured arm.  Morrison goes for the Flying Chuck, but Sheamus prevents it and knocks Morrison off the apron.  Commercials.  Sheamus is still working Morrison’s arm.  Sheamus threw him arm first into the barricade during the break.  Morrison’s arm is taking a beating.  Morrison fights back and makes his comeback.  Morrison lands a kick for 2.  Morrison ducks the brogue kick, but Sheamus lands a blow for 2.  Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge, but Morrison slips out and goes for a backslide.  Sheamus counters it.  Morrison lands an elbow smash and a swinging DDT for 2, as Sheamus reaches the ropes.  Morrison goes up top.  Sheamus pulls him down by the arm.  Cover gets 2.  Sheamus works a Fujiwara armbar.  Morrison drops Sheamus with a Pele kick and goes for the Starship Pain.  Sheamus gets his knees up, then lands the brogue kick.  Sheamus hits the Razor’s Edge for the pin in 12:05.  This was actually pretty good.  All hail King Sheamus!  Rima Fakih crowds King Sheamus.  Sheamus cuts a brief Royal Promo.

Miz vs. Lawler is NEXT!  Commercials!

Tables, Ladders, & Chairs Match for the WWE Championship: The Miz (c) (w/ Alex Riley) vs. Jerry “The King” Lawler.  Riley is still carrying the Money In The Bank briefcase for some reason.  Miz wins the lock up and tries to cheap shot Lawler, but Lawler nails him with a great punch.  They lock up again.  Miz slams Lawler and taunts him.  They lock up a third time.  Lawler shoves Miz down.  Miz beats up Lawler and throws him outside.  Riley hands Miz a chair, which he uses to hit Lawler in the back repeatedly.  Miz throws Lawler back into the ring, along with 2 chairs.  He sets the chairs up and tries to suplex Lawler into them.  Lawler reverses and tries a suplex, but Miz lands on his feet.  Miz hits a backbreaker into the chair, then a neckbreaker.  Miz beats up Lawler.  Riley tries to hand Miz a ladder.  Lawler wails on Miz’s back with a chair.  Lawler tries to bring in a ladder.  Riley tries to stop him and gets his ass kicked by the King.  Lawler and Miz play tug of war with the ladder.  Lawler sends the ladder into Miz’s face.  He charges Miz int he corner with the ladder, but Miz avoids the blow and beats Lawler down.  Lawler back body drops Miz onto the ladder.  Riley gets on the apron and clotheslines Lawler.  Riley tries to suplex Lawler out of the ring, but Lawler decks him.  Riley falls off the apron through a table.  Lawler climbs the ladder.  Miz cuts him off and drops him with a big boot.  Miz suplexes Lawler onto a chair, then beats him with the chair some more.  Miz goes up top with the chair.  Lawler cuts him off and crotches him.  Lawler goes for a superplex.  Miz headbutts him down.  Lawler knocks Miz off the top rope through a table!  Cole leaves the table to help his boyfriend.  Lawler climbs the ladder.  Cole gets in the ring and grabs his foot.  That little fucker!  Lawler is like WTF?  DECK HIM!  LAWLER DECKS COLE!  Lawler starts beating the shit out of him.  Miz climbs the ladder.  Lawler climbs the other side and decks him.  They fight on top of the ladder.  Miz sends the belt into Lawler’s head.  Lawler falls off.  Miz takes down the belt to win in 11:52.  Really good match.

Very enjoyable show with a couple of really good matches.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 11/26/10

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 4, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open.  Todd Grisham, Michael Cole, and Matt Striker are the announcers.

World Heavyweight Champion Kane comes out and cuts a promo about Edge stealing his father.  He says he won’t press charges or do nasty, violent things to Edge if Edge will return Paul Bearer.  Kane then starts to talk about his feelings.  I check out that this point.  Edge comes out with an empty wheelchair.  He’s a dick and humiliates Kane by making him practically beg.  This shit is so obnoxious.  Edge leaves without returning Paul Bearer.  This shit is horrible.

Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger in a King of the Ring Qualifier is next.

Tony Chimel is the ring announcer.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger (w/ The Swagger Soaring Eagle).  They lock up.  Swagger does some amateur stuff.  Kofi gets a cradle for 2.  Kofi gets a crucifix hold for 2.  Kofi gets a sunset flip.  Swagger gets the ropes and bails.  Back inside, Kofi misses a dropkick.  Swagger goes for the ankle lock, but settles for catapulting Kofi into the corner.  Kofi catches himself and hits a rebound cross body for 2.  Swagger beats up Kofi.  Kofi tries to leap frog Swagger, but fucks up.  Swagger clips his leg and goes for the ankle lock.  Kofi gets the ropes.  Swagger works Kofi’s leg.  Kofi bails.  Insta-commercials.  Kofi hits a monkey flip.  Swagger backdrops Kofi to the apron.  The eagle trips Kofi.  Swagger knocks Kofi off the apron.  Back inside, Swagger applies a body scissors.  Kofi elbows his way free.  Kofi gets caught with a knee lift.  Swagger goes back to working the leg.  The eagle cheap shots Kofi again and dances.  Swagger does the abdominal stretch in the ropes.  Cover gets 2.  Swagger applies a shoulder hold.  Swagger hot shots Kofi into the turnbuckle.  Swagger sends Kofi out of the ring.  They brawl outside.  Kofi slams Swagger’s head into the steps.  Back inside, Swagger hits a clothesline for 2.  Swagger applies a double arm… thing.  I never know what to call that.  Crowd is solidly behind Kofi.  Kofi makes his comeback and hits the Boom Drop against the ropes for 2.  Kofi goes for a diving cross body, but Swagger catches him and hits a powerslam.  Swagger goes for the Vader Bomb, but Kofi catches him with raised feet.  Kofi goes for the pendulum kick, but Swagger catches it and goes for the ankle lock.  Kofi sends Swagger into the post, then clobbers him with an awesome Trouble In Paradise for the pin (13:26 shown).  This was long and boring.  I like both guys, but they never click when they wrestle each other, which seems to be all the time.

Kane apologizes to Teddy Long for being a dick last week.  Edge appears on the TV.  He has Paul Bearer, who has apparently soiled himself, bound and gagged.  Edge removes the tape from Bearer’s mouth and Bearer insults the fans.  Kane goes to look for them.

Kane goes into a bathroom and finds an empty wheelchair.  This shit is so fucking stupid.

Josh Matthews interviews Alberto Del Rio. who vows to become king.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

WWE.com plug.

Tony Chimel introduces Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Alberto Del Rio vs. The Big Show.  Del Rio attacks Show and tries to come off the top.  Show goozles him.  Del Rio drops to the floor to escape.  Insta-commercials.  Del Rio tries a German suplex and fails miserably.  Show lands the big chop and beats up Del Rio.  Del Rio counters the chokeslam again and goes on the attack.  Del Rio lands an enzuigiri and goes for the Minoru Special, but Show turns it into a backdrop.  Show goes for the KO punch.  Del Rio bails.  They brawl outside.  Show throws Del Rio back inside.  Rodriguez grabs Show’s leg.  Show kills Rodriguez with the KO punch.  Show gets counted out, giving Del Rio win the win (4:58 shown).  Meh.

Edge is up in the cheap seats with the bound and gagged Paul Bearer.  He calls out Kane.  Ugh.  Kane comes out.  They banter.  Paul gets his tapped remove and bashes the people some more.  This shit is so horrible.  Kane says Edge can have another title match.  Edge says he’s taking Paul to the hot dog stand.  Kane pursues through the crowd.  Whoever came up with this angle should be beaten retarded with a tree limb.  Kane finds an empty chair in the lobby.

Survivor Series song plug.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Drew McIntyre.  They lock up.  McIntyre wins the lock up and talks shit.  MVP kicks his ass.  MVP hits an enzui knee strike for 2.  They brawl outside.  McIntyre stomps MVP’s arm into the steps.  McIntyre attacks the arm.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  McIntyre keeps working the arm.  McIntyre gets bumped off of the apron.  MVP makes his comeback.  MVP hits the Ballin’ elbow and goes for the Playmaker.  McIntyre counters.  MVP lands some punches.  MVP hurts himself trying to catch the ropes.  McIntyre hits the Future Shock for the pin in 5:22.  Fine little match.

Swagger is backstage bitching at the eagle.  Hornswoggle is dressed as an Indian.  Rosa Mendez serves him a burnt turkey.  Skinny women can’t cook!  Hornswoggle decides he’s going to eat the dejected eagle.  He shoots it (off screen) with a bow & arrow.

Michelle McCool and Layla come out to be obnoxious and make me hate wrestling.

Michelle McCool (w/ Layla) vs. Kelly Kelly.  Layla sprays shit at Kelly, allowing McCool to get the jump on her.  McCool goes for the Styles Clash, but Kelly holds onto the ropes to avoid it.  Kelly gets a cradle for the pin in 1:03.  Thank God it was short.  LayCool jump Kelly after the match.  Beth Phoenix makes the save and gives McCool the Glam Slam.

Tonight, Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes!

Jacksonville!

John Cena video package.

Raw Rebound.

Mysterio vs. Rhodes is NEXT!

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Cody Rhodes.  Alberto Del Rio comes out to do commentary.  Mysterio goes on the attack.  Mysterio rolls through a sunset flip, but Rhodes avoids the kick and bails.  He checks his jacket mirror.  Mysterio follows him outside and goes on the attack again.  Rhodes hits the Beautiful Disaster (springboard kick) off the steps.  Back inside, Rhodes hits the Alabama Slam for 2.  Rhodes puts the boots to Mysterio.  Insta-commercials.  Actually, there are clips of the commercials for some reason.  Rhodes has Mysterio in an arm lock.  Rhodes hits something off the top for 2.  Mysterio rallies and hits a springboard cross body for 2.  Rhodes goes for the Cross Rhodes, but Mysterio counters into a jackknife hold for 2.  Rhodes gets a backslide for 2.  Mysterio connects with a head kick for 2.  Mysterio goes for the 619, but Del Rio warns Rhodes to get out of the way.  Mysterio goes for the seated senton off the apron, but Rhodes moves and Del Rio gets it.  Mysterio sends Rhodes into the barricade.  Back inside, the ref gets bumped.  Del Rio pulls Mysterio’s balls into the post.  Rhodes hits the Cross Rhodes for the pin (about 5 1/2 minutes shown).  Best thing on the show by a mile.

Kane barges into the GM’s office and bitches at Teddy Long again.  He threatens Long again.  Edge appears on the TV.  He has Paul Bearer outside.  He challenges Kane to come out, then says “Jacksonville, Florida” about a half dozen times.  He says he wants to give Bearer back before there is an accident.  Kane runs out to wear they were, but a car runs into a stuffed Paul Bearer thing.  Edge has the real Bearer in the car.  Kane throws a mannequin head at it as it speeds away.  Kane is pissed.  So am I for making myself watch this crap.

Besides the Mysterio match, there is absolutely nothing good about this show, and the Kane/Edge shit is insultingly horrible.

WWE Monday Night Raw 11/22/10

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 29, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open.  We are LIVE from Orlando, Florida.  Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are the announcers.  They talk about John Cena being fired last night.

The Nexus come out: Wade Barrett, WWE Tag Team Champions Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater, David Otunga, Michael McGillicutty, and Husky Harris.  Barrett tries to a cut a promo amidst heavy boos from the crowd.  He decides to turn it around and claim that Cena was biased against him last night.  He says an official has never been allowed to put his hands on a competitor.  That is a lie.  He wants another title shot with a neutral referee.  The iBooker 9000 dings in.  Cole reads that the match will happen TONIGHT!  Barrett says that he has allowed John Cena to appear tonight to say his goodbyes.

Tonight, Orton vs. Barrett for the title!  Also, John Cena WILL be here.  Commercials!

Next week, King of the Ring returns!

The announcers chat.  Cole introduces the newest member of the announce team, CM Punk!  Awesome!

Justin Roberts is the ring announcer.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Sheamus vs. R-Truth (w/ Eve Torres).  Truth is back to using his old music, which Eve doesn’t dance nearly as well to.  Punk says “wrestling,” so I assume he’ll be removed from announcing immediately.  Sheamus wins the lock up and takes Truth over with a side headlock.  Sheamus controls with the headlock.  Truth escapes and dances.  He does the splits and lands a jumping side kick.  Sheamus bails and yells.  Commercials.  Sheamus works Truth’s arm for a while.  Truth escapes a long hold and makes his comeback.  Truth lands a missile dropkick for 2.  Truth goes for a front cradle, but Sheamus squashes it for 2.  Sheamus NAILS Truth with the brogue kick (yes, I’m going to call it that now) and follows with the Razor’s Edge (no, I’m still not calling it the High Cross or Pale Justice or whatever the name of the week for it is) for the pin in 11:04.  Boring match.

They air a clip from the new John Cena DVD, showing him preparing for WrestleMania XXVI.  Tonight, Cena will BE HERE!  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Orlando!

Michelle McCool and Layla babble obnoxiously while heading into the building.  The security guy won’t let them in the building because they’re not allowed on Raw since they’re not champs anymore.  Then WHY THE HELL WAS NATALYA ON SMACKDOWN EVERY FUCKING WEEK FOR THE PAST 2 MONTHS?  The NEW WWE Divas Champion Natalya walks up and claims to not know them, so they are shut out of the building.  Thank God.  My joy at not having to see LayCool anymore aside, this was retarded.

Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov are backstage chatting about their loss last night.  Tamina plays Santino a song on a ukulele.  They kiss.

Josh Matthews interviews WWE Champion Randy Orton about the title match tonight.

Up next, Ezekiel Jackson vs. The Miz in a King of the Ring Qualifying Match!  Commercials!

WWE Slam of the Week: Ezekiel Jackson being a BAMF.

Ezekiel Jackson comes out for the match.  Alex Riley comes out and says that Miz had an anxiety attack, so Riley will be wrestling on his behalf.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Ezekiel Jackson vs. Alex Riley.  Riley tries a go behind.  Zeke reverses it.  Riley gets a rope break.  Riley avoids Zeke in the corner and hits a Stinger splash, then takes Zeke down with a headlock.  Cover gets 2.  Riley applies a rear chin lock.  Zeke escapes, mauls a bitch, and hits the Book of Ezekiel for the pin in 1:54.  I’m all for a King Zeke reign!

Tonight, Orton vs. Barrett for the title!

John Cena chats with R-Truth and Eve Torres backstage.  Gail Kim, Santino Marella, and Yoshi Tatsu show up to wish him well.  I’m sad that Yoshi never actually gets a match on Raw.  Commercials!

WWE.com plug.

John Cena comes out to cut his farewell promo.  He talks for a while about the usual stuff: loving his job, missing his family, etc.  He asks for the women and kids to chant “Let’s go Cena!” while the guys chant “Cena sucks!”  They, being a polite crowd, oblige his request.  Cena warns Wade Barrett to stop taking shortcuts.  He finally finishes up by thanking the fans.  I’m sure they appreciate it and will be happy to see him back next week.  They show some sad looking fans.  Cena walks backstage passing R-Truth, Eve, Goldust, The Bella Twins, Kozlov, Santino, Mark Henry, Primo, Ted Dibiase Jr., Maryse, Naomi, Kaitlyn, AJ, Natalya, Yoshi Tatsu, Zack Ryder, John Morrison, Daniel Bryan, Gail Kim, Melina, Alicia Fox, Tyson Kidd, referees and assorted backstage geeks.  He shakes hands with and hugs Randy Orton since they’re best friends now.  Cena walks out of the building.  Wade Barrett steps into frame and does the “You can’t see me” gesture at the back of Cena’s head.  Commercials.

The brand new Amway Center!

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: Ted Dibiase Jr. (w/ Maryse) vs. WWE United States Champion Daniel Bryan (w/ Brie Bella).  Brie runs down the ramp to catch up to Bryan.  I’m taking the announcers’ word that it’s Brie, which means there’s a 99% chance it’s Nikki.  Dibiase jumps Bryan and beats him up.  Dibiase gets a couple of near falls, then applies a waist lock on the mat.  Bryan avoids Dibiase in the corner and drills him with a dropkick.  Dibiase hits a sit-out spinebuster for 2.  Bryan turns his stupid cover into the LeBell Lock for the win in 1:53.  These two have had a really good match in the last 24 hours.  This wasn’t it.  Nikki Bella comes out to join Brie in celebrating with Bryan.  He has them hug each other for some reason.  Maybe they’re going to start calling him gay on top of everything else.

Orton vs. Barrett TONIGHT!  For the BELT!  Commercials!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Non-Title: WWE Divas Champion Natalya vs. Alicia Fox.  Fox holds onto the ropes to avoid a front cradle.  Natalya gives her a monkey flip.  Fox works Natalya’s hair.  She pulls out a tuft of Natalya’s hair, which pisses her off.  Natalya throws Fox down by her hair a bunch, then hits a stalling suplex for 2.  Natalya does a bear hug.  Fox turns it into a cradle.  Natalya locks in the Sharpshooter for the win in 2:16.  This was crap.

Tonight, Orotn vs. Barrett for the belt!

John Morrison and Melina chat backstage.  Are they still together?  Morrison is in action NEXT!  Commercials.

WWE Rewind: The Hart Dynasty vs. Nexus from last week’s Raw, when Tyson Kidd TURNED on David Hart Smith.

King of the Ring Qualifying Match: John Morrison vs. Tyson Kidd.  Kidd has new HEEL music.  They lock up and trade arm locks.  Morrison backs Kidd into the corner.  Kidd stomps Morrison in the corner, slides out of the ring, and drops him across the apron, then delivers a kick.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Kidd applies a side headlock and yells.  Morrison fights back and lands a fancy kick.  Morrison lands a side kick for 2.  Kidd hits a twisting Fisherman buster for 2.  Kidd beats up Morrison a bit.  Morrison goes for the Flying Chuck.  Kidd tries to cut him off, but fails.  Morrison lands it and follows with the Starship Pain for the pin in 3:17.  It was okay.  Too short, like most things tonight.

Orton vs. Barrett is NEXT!  Commercials.

Hype for next week’s King of the Ring Tournament.

Randy Orton comes out for his title defense, but is jumped in the aisle by The Nexus and ASSAULTED!  Orton’s knee has been injured!  Commercials!

WWE Championship Match: Randy Orton (c) vs. Wade Barrett.  They both make their entrances again, even though they were both out there 5 minutes ago.  Orton is selling the knee injury.  In ring intros, and we’re off!  Orton lands some punches.  Barrett attacks the injured knee.  Barrett rams the knee into the apron.  Cover gets 2.  Barrett works the knee.  Orton catches Barrett with the 3.0.  Across the injured knee.  Idiot.  Barrett hits the Wasteland and covers.  John Cena appears and pulls the referee out of the ring!  Cena gives Barrett the Attitude Adjustment.  Nexus runs out.  Cena escapes through the crowd.  Orton hits Barrett with the RKO for the pin in 3:50.  Orton retains the title!  The Miz comes out!  He’s cashing in the Money In The Bank contract RIGHT NOW!

WWE Championship Match: Randy Orton (c) vs. The Miz (w/ Alex Riley).  Miz goes for the knee.  Orton clubbers his back.  Repeat.  Miz kicks Orton’s knee out from under him and sets to work on it.  Miz rams Orton’s knee into the post repeatedly.  Orton kicks him away and into the barricade.  Back inside, Orton makes his comeback.  Orton goes for the DDT OF MURDER, but Miz counters and takes his knee out.  Orton manages to hit the powerslam and starts humping the mat.  Miz counters the RKO and hits the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin in 2:44!  THE MIZ IS WWE CHAMPION!  They show kids looking sad and angry in the audience.  Awesome!

This show was crap when it comes to wrestling, but it was still fun, entertaining, and eventful.