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WWE SummerSlam 2012

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 20, 2012 by Grappleholic

New WWE open, which debuted on the 1,000th Raw.  Intro video for the 25th SummerSlam, which isn’t the 25th anniversary, but is billed as such because WWE doesn’t know how anniversaries work.  Pyro and ballyhoo.  We are LIVE from Los Angeles!  Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are the announcers.

Vickie Guerrero comes out to scream at us.  I guess that means Ziggler vs. Jericho is up first.  They show clips of Ziggler winning the Money In The Bank Ladder Match last month.  Jericho comes out and they show a clip of Ziggler injuring Jericho’s ribs this past Smackdown.  Justin Roberts is a ring announcer.

Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vickie Guerrero) vs. Chris Jericho.  Jericho is sporting taped ribs from the aforementioned attack.  Ziggler runs around the ring and Jericho gives chase.  Back inside, Jericho catches him with an elbow smash and beats him up a bit.  Ziggler does a drop down and a leap frog, but Jericho catches him with a chop.  Ziggler avoids a suplex and attacks the injured ribs.  Jericho gets a reprieve by back body dropping Ziggler to the floor.  He goes for his rebound dropkick to the apron, but fails and eats the floor as Ziggler makes it back into the ring.  Ziggler continues to punish the ribs.  Vickie is obnoxious at ringside.  Ziggler hits a Rude Awakening, complete with gyrating hips, then pulls a Jericho classic on foot cover for 2.  Jericho gets whipped into the ropes, but catches Ziggler with a schoolboy for 2.  Ziggler charges Jericho in the corner, eats it, and Jericho gets a brief flurry.  Ziggler charges the corner again and eats Jericho’s boot.  Jericho follows with a diving elbow smash.  Ziggler sends Jericho into the post, then hits the Fameasser for 2.  Jericho goes for the Walls of Jericho, fails, but lands an enzuigiri for 2.  Ziggler avoids Jericho in the corner, jumps on his back, and clamps on the sleeper hold.  Jericho backs Ziggler into the corner to escape.  Ziggler kicks him in the ribs and goes up top.  Jericho cuts him off, pounds on him, and hits a top rope Frankensteiner~!  Delayed cover gets 2.  Ziggler catches Jericho out of nowhere with a swank DDT for 2.  They trade shots.  Jericho hits the bulldog and goes for the Lionsault.  Ziggler catches him in the injured ribs with raised knees, then hits the Zig Zag, but Jericho kicks out!  Jericho catches Ziggler with the Codebreaker.  Ziggler rolls to the floor.  Jericho throws Ziggler back into the ring.  Vickie grabs Jericho’s leg, allowing Ziggler to get an inside cradle for 2.  Jericho sends Ziggler into the post and locks in the Walls of Jericho.  Ziggler taps in 13:06.  Yes, Jericho won, but is this really “the big one?”  It made sense when Jericho did this angle with The Rock in 2001 and won the World title, but is the opening match of SummerSlam the same thing?  Good match, though.

Slim Jim commercial.

Los Angeles!

They show Brock Lesnar destroying Shawn Michaels on Raw last week.

Matt Striker interviews Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman.  Well, Paul does all of the talking.

Lillian Garcia is also a ring announcer.  The Spanish announcers, Carlos Cabrera and Marcelo Rodriguez, are present as well.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane.  Kane has his dukes up, which amuses me.  Bryan kicks at the larger man’s legs.  Kane catches a kick and throws him down.  Bryan avoids an elbow and kicks him some more.  Kane punches him a bit.  Bryan backflips off the top rope, then gets slammed for 2.  Kane stomps Bryan in the corner.  Fans are chanting for Bryan.  Bryan fails at a reverse cradle and eats a big boot.  Cover gets 2 for Kane.  Bryan kicks at Kane’s knee some more.  Kane nonchalantly choke throws Bryan out of the ring.  Bryan gets back in as Kane comes out and takes him out with a tope suicide.  Back inside, Bryan hits a missile dropkick for 2.  Bryan lands more kicks as the crowd chants “YES!”  Kane ducks a critical blow and lands a clothesline.  Kane hits a sidewalk slam for 2.  Kane hits the diving lariat and goes for the chokeslam.  Bryan counters out and rolls to the apron, pulls Kane’s head over the top rope, then comes back in to eat a punch.  Bryan slaps Kane defiantly.  Kane beats the crap out of him in the corner until the referee forces a break.  Bryan takes the opportunity and goes on the offensive.  He goes for the LeBell/Yes/No Lock, fails, and settles for kicking Kane in the chest.  He gets annoyed at the “YES!” chants and goes for the diving headbutt.  Kane catches him by the throat and hits the chokeslam.  Instead of covering, he signals for the Tombstone.  Bryan counters it into an inside cradle for the pin in 8:03!  Bryan wins!  YES!  YES!  YES!  Fun little match.

Kane, pissed that lost, rampages around backstage.  Josh Matthews tries to interview him, but Kane grabs him by the throat, yells “WHERE?!  IS?!  HE?!” and throws him away, then continues his rampage.

Don’t drink and drive.

WWE Intercontinental Championship Match: The Miz (c) vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.  I think Mysterio’s costume is supposed to be Batman.  They lock up.  Miz lands a shoulder block.  Mysterio sits up and kind of stares at him.  They do a bit of wrestling that ends in Rey getting a near fall and Miz taking a quick powder.  Miz comes back in and gets to stompin’.  Rey hits a flying headscissors.  Miz throws Rey out of the ring.  Rey slides back in as Miz slides out, then dropkicks Miz through the ropes.  Miz sends Rey torso-first into the barricade.  Back inside, Miz goes to work.  Rey counters a backdrop and gets a 2 count.  Miz catches Rey with that lucha-style backbreaker that Jericho does on Rey for 2.  Miz beats on Rey some more.  Rey tries to make a comeback, but eats a clothesline, which gets a 2 count for Miz.  Miz hits his corner clothesline and goes up top, but Rey dropkicks Miz, crotching h im on the top turbuckle.  Rey hits the diving seated senton and goes for a rana, but Miz catches him with a powerbomb for 2.  Rey ducks a kick and gets a cradle for 2, then kicks Miz in the head for another 2.  Combine the two, and he got a 4 count, so he almost won under Canadian rules.  Rey hits a whirly DDT for 2.  Rey goes up top again, but gets caught.  Rey fights Miz off and hits a diving headscissors, which puts Miz into 619 position.  Rey hits the 619 and goes for the diving splash, but Miz avoids it.  Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale, but Rey turns it into a cradle for 2.  Miz launches Rey into the turnbuckles, then hits the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin in 9:10.  It was okay, but I never really got into it.

Plug for the WWE iPhone/Android app.  I downloaded it.  It’s not that interesting.

Teddy Long and Eve Torres walk out of the GM’s office and talk about how quirky AJ Lee is.  They walk away and WWE Champion CM Punk walks into the office.  He complains to AJ about being in a Triple Threat Match tonight.  She just cocks her head and stares off into space, ignoring him.

Sheamus/Alberto Del Rio hype video.

Ricardo Rodriguez introduces Alberto Del Rio for the World Championship match.

World Heavyweight Championship Match: Sheamus (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio.  They lock up.  Del Rio backs Sheamus into the corner.  Repeat.  They tumble out of the ring together and brawl on the floor.  Back inside, Sheamus hits a neckbreaker for 2.  Sheamus hits the Finlay Roll for 2.  Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge, but fails.  He ends up getting Del Rio up on his shoulders as Del Rio exposes the turnbuckle.  Sheamus counters the Minoru Special and misses the Brogue Kick.  Del Rio kicks Sheamus off the apron, then sends him knee first into the steps.  Back inside, Del Rio clamps on a rear chin lock.  Sheamus escapes and goes for another neckbreaker, but Del Rio kicks him in the knee, then in the head for 2.  They fight some more.  Del Rio is wearing black gear that looks reall weird on him for some reason.  He taunts Sheamus by doing the “Brogue!” taunt.  He teases a Brogue Kick, but Sheamus cuts him off.  Del Rio sends Sheamus’ shoulder into the post.  Sheamus tries to go up top, but gets cut off.  Del Rio hits an arm breaker (pulling the knees into the arm) off the top for 2.  There has to be a better name for that move.  Del Rio goes for his move, but Sheamus counters.  Del Rio counters the counter and hits the Minoru Special.  Sheamus powers up and slams Del Rio down.  Sheamus hits the White Noise (Schwein) for 2.  Sheamus goes for the Brogue Kick, but Del Rio avoids him.  Sheamus clubbers Del Rio in the chest.  Why hasn’t the referee fixed that exposed turnbuckle?  Oh, I see.  Del Rio drops Sheamus into the exposed buckle, then hits an enzuigiri, but Sheamus kicks out!  Del Rio roughs up Ricardo just because he’s a dick.  Sheamus hits Del Rio with Ricardo’s shoe, then hits the White Noise for the pin in 11:24, even though Del Rio’s foot was on the bottom rope.  That’s actually the finish?  Okay then.  Del Rio and Ricardo bitch at the referee, and rightfully so.  This match did not click with me at all.

Plug for the National Guard, or rather, how great WWE is for supporting the National Guard.

Cole and Lawler plug Night of Champions.

On the pre-show, Triple H told referee Scott Armstrong to not DQ or count anyone out tonight in his match with Brock Lesnar.

Last week on Raw, the Prime Time Players beat up R-Truth while Kofi Kingston was in China, then Touted about it.

WWE Tag Team Championship Match: Kofi Kingston & R-Truth (c) vs. The Prime Time Players.  Truth beats up Young to start.  O’Neil tags in and drops Truth with a boot, barks, and covers for 2.  Kofi tags in and keeps O’Neil off balance with his speed.  Kofi hits the Boom Drop and goes for the Trouble In Paradise, but Young distracts him.  Heel chicanery on the outside leads to the Players getting the advantage.  Kofi plays face in peril.  Young looks like he’s trying to get Kofi in some retarded triangle choke.  It fails completely, but he continues to put a beating on Kofi.  O’Neil tags in and applies an abdominal stretch.  Kofi turns a spinning slam into a spike DDT.  Truth gets the hot tag and runs wild on Darren Young.  Truth hits a front suplex.  Cover, but O’Neil saves.  O’Neil throws Kofi out of the ring, but Kofi skins the cat, low bridges him out, and takes him out with a dive.  Truth thinks about a dive, but Young schoolboys him for 2.  Young goes for something and fails, and Truth hits the Paydirt, whatever he’s calling it this week, for the pin in 7:07.  Players are nothing without AW.  This match was pretty close to nothing, too.

Axxess clips.

Punk/Cena/Show hype video.

Triple Threat Match for the WWE Championship: CM Punk (c) vs. John Cena vs. The Big Show.  Big Show beats up everyone to start.  Punk seems to be channeling Bret Hart with his pink gear.  Cena and Punk unite to try to suplex Show, but Show suplexes both of them at the same time.  Show wins on them some more.  Cena gets tossed out of the ring by Show and Punk makes a comeback until he stupidly goes for the Go 2 Sleep and fails.  Cena tries to give Show the Attitude Adjustment, but Punk pushes them over.  Punk covers Cena, but Show saves.  Show beats up Punk some more and throws Cena out of the ring again.  Punk avoids Show in the corner and goes for a springboard cross body, but Show catches him and hits the Final Cut.  Show signals for the KO punch, but Cena reappears and cuts him off.  Show spears Cena for 2.  Show goes for a Vader Bomb onto both opponents, but Punk avoids it and Cena takes the full brunt.  Punk breaks Show’s cover.  Show throws Punk out of the ring, then goes after Cena on the other side.  Punk tries a dive, but Show catches him and launches him into the ropes from the outside.  Awesome.  Show and Cena go at it in the ring.  Punk pulls Show’s head over the top rope, allowing Cena to hit a backdrop suplex.  LA crowd doesn’t like Cena.  Cena signals for the Five Knuckle Shuffle, but Punk cuts him off.  Punk hits the diving elbow drop on Show.  Cover, but Show throws him across the ring at 2.  Punk kicks Show in the head and locks in the Koji Clutch, of all things.  Show breaks out.  Punk takes a powder.  Cena hits Show with a shoulder block and locks in the STF.  Show stands and backs Cena into the corner.  Cena goes for a dive, but Show catches and slams him.  Punk drops Show with a diving lariat and hits him with 3 running knees to the corner, but Show counters the bulldog.  Cena hits Show with the diving Fameasser, but ends up on the apron.  Punk locks Show in the Koji Clutch.  Cena also applies the STF.  Show taps.  The referee calls for the bell, but there are 2 winners.  Cena and Punk argue with the referee.  Raw GM AJ Lee skips out and rules that the match must continue.  Show immediately chokeslams both me.  Cover on Cena gets 2.  Cover on Punk gets 2.  Cena ducks the KO punch and hits Show with the Attitude Adjustment.  Punk throws Cena out of the ring and pins Show in 14:28.  Very enjoyable match.  Punk celebrates.

Los Angeles!

Celebrities are here!  Including former WCW World Heavyweight Champion David Arquette and WrestleMania participant Maria Menounos (sporting a Bob Backlund shirt).

Trailer for WWE Films’ latest, The Day.

On the preshow, Antonio Cesaro beat Santino Marella for the WWE United States Championship, with help from Aksana.

Kevin Ruldolf (who?) performs the SummerSlam theme song.  People Dance like idiots.  The divas come out to dance: Tamina, Kaitlyn, Natalya, Aksana, Eve Torres, Kelly Kelly, Cameron, Naomi, Layla, Rosa Mendez, and Alicia Fox.

Los Angeles.

Triple H/Lesnar hype video.

Brock Lesnar (w/ Paul Heyman) vs. Triple H.  Brock immediately powers Triple H into the corner.  Hunter comes back with punches.  Brock repeats and goes for the Kimura.  Triple H counters.  Brock beats him in the corner some more and goes for it again.  He gets a standing version, but Hunter is in the ropes.  Triple H fights back and clotheslines Brock out of the ring.  Brock comes back in and beats up Triple H in the corner some more.  Hunter lands a knee lift and clotheslines Brock out of the ring again.  Lesnar looks irked.  Brock comes back in and takes off his gloves.  It’s a bare knuckle fight now!  Brock gets a double leg takedown and pummels Triple H with a few punches.  Hunter bails, selling a punch to the back of the head.  They brawl outside.  Brock gives Hunter a hammerlock slam onto the announce table.  The brawl some more back inside.  Brock delivers another hammerlock slam.  Brock continues working the arm.  Triple H counters an F-5 attempt, but Brock hits him with a BIG German suplex.  Brock stomps Triple H’s arm again.  Triple H tries to bail, gets caught, and pulls Brock against the top rope.  Hunter manages to score with a DDT.  Brock immediately goes after the arm again.  I always enjoy a hammerlock slam, and Brock is dishing them out liberally tonight.  They go outside and Lesnar sends Triple H into the post.  They wreck the Spanish announce table.  Brock actually jumps off of it and hits Triple H with a big chop.  Back in the ring, Triple H tries to fight back.  Lesnar gets an inside cradle of all things for 2.  Lesnar hits a clothesline and goes for a suplex, but Hunter counters and suplexes him.  Lesnar clotheslines the turnbuckle.  Triple H goes for the Pedigree, but fails, gets whipped into the corner, and does the Michaels flip out of the ring.  Brock takes a shot into the announce table on his stomach and starts dry heaving.  The announcers talk about his issues with diverticulitis.  Hunter goes after the midsection.  He hits some knee lifts to the stomach.  Triple H hits the spinebuster and goes for the Pedigree.  Lesnar counters and goes for the F-5.  Triple H counters and hits the Pedigree, but Lesnar kicks out.  Triple H goes for the Pedigree again, but Lesnar hits him square in the balls.  The referee, per Hunter’s request, is letting it go.  Lesnar hits the F-5, but Triple H kicks out.  Lesnar locks on the standing Kimura again.  Triple H tries to fight out, but Lesnar goes to the ground with it.  Triple H gets the ropes, but the ref isn’t enforcing the rules.  Hunter fights out of the hold.  Hunter hits the Pedigree and goes for the cover, but Lesnar gets the Kimura again.  Triple H taps in 18:45.  I’m absolutely shocked that they did the right thing and put Lesnar over.  The match was an intense brawl, but not on the level of Lesnar/Cena.  I’ll give it a thumbs slightly up.  Lesnar leaves.  Hunter refuses medical attention.  Fans chant “YOU TAPPED OUT!”, which is probably not what WWE was going for with this.  Hunter mouths “I’m sorry” and leaves to a mixture of boos and polite applause.

This show started well, dipped really low in the middle, peaked with the triple threat match, and ended okay.  I’d say the show as a whole is thumbs in the middle.

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WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 3/11/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 13, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, Smackdown open, pyro and ballyhoo.  We are TAPED from Houston!  Josh Matthews, Michael Cole, and Booker T are the announcers.  Triple H will be here tonight.  Justin Roberts is the ring announcer.

World Heavyweight Champion Edge comes out.  They show the contract signing and brawl with Alberto Del Rio last week, with Christian making the save for Edge and beating the piss out of Del Rio.  Edge says he wants to fight Del Rio tonight.  Alberto Del Rio and Brodus Clay come out.  Del Rio and Edge talk shit to each other.  Edge attacks them both.  That’s stupid, because there are two of them, and they quickly overcome Edge and put a beating on him.  Christian makes the save.  Big Brodus Clay drops him too.  Referees come out to break it up.  Teddy Long comes out and books a tag match with Del Rio & Clay against the 7-time Tag Team Champions, Edge & Christian!

Michael Cole says he’s going to interview John Cena tonight.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Kane comes out.  They show the stuff with Kane, Big Show, and The Corre from last week.  Wade Barrett comes out and cuts a promo on him.

Kane vs. Wade Barrett.  Barrett goes on the attack.  Kane rallies and beats up Barrett.  The rest of The Corre hit the ring to cause the DQ in 42 seconds.  The Big Show makes the save with a steel chair.  Insta-commercials.

The Big Show & Kane vs. Wade Barrett & WWE Tag Team Champion Heath Slater of The Corre.  JIP.  Show beats up Slater.  Barrett tags in.  Show beats him up too.  Barrett counters the choke slam and chop blocks Show’s knee, then drops him with a big boot and stomps on him.  Slater tags in to continue the work.  Show stands up with Slater on his back and drops him.  Kane gets the tag and hits Slater with the diving lariat.  Kane hits a sidewalk slam, then knocks Barrett off the apron.  Kane hits a big boot and goes for the chokeslam.  Gabriel and Zeke run in to cause the DQ again (3:19 shown).  Big Show cleans house with a chair, then hits Kane with it for good measure because of what happened last week.

Rey Mysterio is backstage getting ready for action.

From Raw: Michael Cole introduces John Bradshaw Layfield as his chosen referee from WrestleMania, but Stone Cold Steve Austin signed on for the job instead!

Tonight, Edge & Christian vs. Del Rio & Clay!

Cody Rhodes is headed our way!

From Smackdown 2 weeks ago: Cody & Dusty Rhodes set up Rey Mysterio!

Cody Rhodes vs. JTG.  Rhodes wrestles in his suit for some damn reason.  Maybe the airline lost his gear.  He attacks JTG and beats the hell out of him.  Rhodes hits the Cross Rhodes for the pin in 52 seconds.  SQUASH.

From Raw: Shawn Michaels speaks on Triple H/Undertaker.

Tonight, Triple H responds to The Undertaker!  Next, Cole interviews John Cena!

Houston!

Michael Cole interviews John Cena in the ring.  The show WWE Champion The Miz attacking Cena on Raw.  Cena tells Cole to shut up, then cuts a promo on Miz.  He says he’s done with the BS with The Rock and he’s going to focus on Miz.  He goes to leave, but Cole says he’s not done.  He talks about how gay he is for Miz.  Cena goes to kick his ass.  Jack Swagger hits the ring and attacks Cena, with Cole cheering him on.  Swagger goes for the ankle lock.  Cena kicks him out of the ring and picks Cole up for the Attitude Adjusment.  Swagger saves him and takes it himself.

Tonight, Edge & Christian vs. Del Rio & Clay!

Sin Cara vignette.

Layla (w/ Michelle McCool) vs. Kaitlyn.  “Shucky ducky quack quack,” Booker T says.  I have no fucking clue.  I can make a good guess about how awful this match will be.  They lock up.  Kaitlyn shoves Layla, then pulls her off the ropes onto her back.  McCool gets on the apron.  Kaitlyn tussles with her.  Layla lands a kick and hits the Lay Out for the pin in 55 seconds.  Thank God.  They beat up Kaitlyn after the match.

Mysterio in action next.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Cole is back on commentary.  Ugh.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Drew McIntyre.  McIntyre boots Mysterio in the face early and keeps the heat going for a bit.  Mysterio hits a headscissors and goes for the 619.  McIntyre bails.  Mysterio gives him a drop toe hold into the apron.  McIntyre sends Mysterio into the post, then gives him a sidewalk slam into the apron.  Insta-commercials.  McIntyre does a bow & arrow lock.  McIntyre tries to set up a superplex.  Mysterio knocks him down, hits the senton, then misses a high cross body.  McIntyre gets an Oklahoma Roll for 2.  Mysterio hits the 619 and a diving splash for the pin (4:30 shown).  Good little match.  Cody Rhodes comes out.  He wants an answer to his WrestleMania challenge.  Mysterio agrees to the match.

Next, Triple H responds to The Undertaker!

Triple H comes to the ring and introduces a video package on himself.  He cuts a long promo about his match with the Undertaker at WrestleMania.  Over the years, it’s become habit for me to zone out when he talks.

Matt Striker interviews Christian.  Edge comes in.  The main event is NEXT!

Houston!

Justin Roberts introduces Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Brodus Clay, who is already in the ring, and Alberto Del Rio, who comes out in his car.

Alberto Del Rio & Brodus Clay vs. World Heavyweight Champion Edge & Christian.  Christian beats up Clay, who is a fucking awesome big man and sells like a big man should.  Christian goes for a tornado DDT, but Del Rio distracts him.  Clay hits a fall away slam.  On the outside, Del Rio sends Christian into the barricade.  Edge chases Del Rio, who bails into the crowd.  Clay hits an elbow drop on Christian for 2.  Clay slams Christian and tags in Del Rio.  Del Rio hits like a running stomp for 2.  Del Rio works Christian’s arm for a while.  Christian hits the diving European uppercut.  Clay and Edge tag in.  CLay catches a cross body and powerslams Edge for 2.  Edge gives Clay a drop toe hold into the bottom turnbuckle, knocks Del Rio off the apron, and goes for the spear.  Clay catches him with a clothesline, then sets him in the corner and goes for a running ass.  Edge avoids it.  Del Rio attack Edge.  Christian attacks Del Rio and backdrops him to the floor.  Christian plants Clay with a tornado DDT.  Edge comes off the top with a diving elbow drop on Clay for the pin in 5:49.  Very fun match.  Brodus Clay is wildly entertaining.

Besides the matches being really short, this was a pretty fun show.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 1/28/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 23, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, video of recent goings on.  Josh Matthews, Michael Cole, and Matt Striker are the announcers.

Vickie Guerrero is already in the ring screaming in her nails on a chalkboard voice.  She says Teddy Long won’t be there tonight, so she’s gonna run the show into the ground.  Randy Orton comes out.  He says he’s only here to show his appreciate for being invited here tonight.  He says she’ll have to excuse him for what he does to her boyfriend tonight, just like Miz will have to excuse him for taking the WWE title on Sunday.  He creepily puts his arm around her and compliments her hair.  Everyone so badly wants to see Vickie get RKO’d.  He looks at her threateningly.  Dolph Ziggler comes out and gets all emo.  He and Orton banter.  Ziggler demands respect.  Orton says respect has to be earned, then drops Ziggler with an RKO.

Tonight, Edge & Randy Orton take on The Miz & Dolph Ziggler!

Tony Chimel is the ring announcer.

Michelle McCool & Layla vs. Kelly Kelly & Kaitlyn.  Team KKK jump LayCool in the aisle and kick their asses.  The match finally starts.  Kaitlyn eats a boot from MCCool, but rallies and beats her up some more.  Layla intervenes.  McCool boots Kaitlyn in the face for the pin in 40 seconds.  I guess it served its purpose and was thankfully short.

Kofi Kingston insists that we don’t try this at home.  There’s always random shit like that on the UK broadcasts.

Speaking of random shit from the UK broadcasts, we get part of an Undertaker/Big Show Steel Cage Match from 2008.  Jim Ross and Tazz are doing commentary.  I fast forward for a bit.  Undertaker wins with the Hell’s Gate.

Drew McIntyre vs. JTG.  Kelly Kelly is at ringside, probably because she couldn’t find her way back to the locker room.  Cole calls her on her hypocrisy, having just participated in a pre-match attack after bitching at McIntyre for kicking ass last week.  JTG beats up McIntyre and dropkicks him to the floor.  McIntyre drags JTG out of the ring and kicks his ass.  Back inside, McIntyre gives JTG a bunch of neckbreakers for 2.  McIntyre beats JTG’s ass some more.  McIntyre hits a nice dropkick for 2.  McIntyre applies a shoulder hold.  JTG gets a crucifix hold out of nowhere for 2.  McIntyre takes offense and stomps on JTG’s face.  McIntyre gets some 2 counts, then goes back to the shoulder hold.  JTG fights out and gets a backslide for 2.  JTG makes his comeback.  McIntyre rolls through another backslide attempt and hits the Future Shock for the pin in 4:36.  Fun little match.  Kelly gets in the ring.  McIntyre wisely blows her off and leaves.

Tonight, Miz & Ziggler vs. Rated RKO!

Cincinnati!

They show Rey Mysterio breaking Cody Rhodes’ face last week.

Todd Grisham interviews Cody Rhodes, who won’t face the camera.  He says that since his face is broken, he can’t wrestle and he’ll have to have reconstructive courtesy.  He’s all emo because he’s not Dashing anymore.

Jack Korpela interviews World Heavyweight Champion Edge.  He talks about The Corre, then moves onto his tag match tonight.

Alberto Del Rio is headed our way.  He meets Michael Tarver, who is randomly hanging around backstage again.

Tony Chimel introduces Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio.  Del Rio comes out and says he’s going to do a Royal Rumble Exhibition with 39 fighters from all over the world.  Really?  Some guy named Seth Allen comes out.  Del Rio kicks his ass and tosses him.  Mike Stevens is next.  Del Rio kicks his ass.  Kane comes out and kicks Del Rio’s ass.  Del Rio rallies and rocks Kane with an enzuigiri.  Kane recovers and goes for a chokeslam.  WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston comes out and bundles both of them over the top rope.  So I guess he wins.  Or not.  Del Rio and Kane surround him.  Rey Mysterio Jr. comes out to even the odds.  Vickie Guerrero comes out and books them in a tag match RIGHT NOW!  Insta-commercials.

Kane & Alberto Del Rio vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston & Rey Mysterio Jr.  Kane beats up Kofi.  Kofi dropkicks Kane’s knee, then kicks him in the face.  Del Rio tags in and beats up Kofi.  Kofi rallies and makes the tag.  They double team Del Rio.  Mysterio is rocking wonky half gold/half silver gear tonight.  Del Rio avoids Mysterio in the corner, causing him to tackle the turnbuckle.  Kane tags in.  Mysterio gets him into position and goes for the 619.  Kane bails.  Mysterio hits him with a baseball slide dropkick.  Kofi tags in.  Kofi and Mysterio hit stereo baseball slide dropkicks.  Kofi hits Del Rio with a tope suicida.  Mysterio hits Kane with the Bombs Away to the floor.  Back inside, Kofi goes up top.  Del Rio pushes him off.  The heels get the heat on Kofi for a while.  Mysterio gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Mysterio tries to springboard, but Kane boots him to the floor.  Insta-commercials.  Heels get the heat on Mysterio.  Mysterio plants Kane with a whirling DDT.  Kofi and Del Rio tag in.  Kofi runs wild.  Del Rio catches him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for 2.  Kofi hits the pendulum kick and a diving cross body.  Kane saves.  Del Rio argues with Kane for being knocked off the apron a minute ago.  Kane boots him in the face and leaves.  Mysterio hits the 619.  Kofi follows with the Trouble In Paradise for the pin (12:23 shown).  Good match.

Highlights of Edge/Miz from Raw.

Tonight, Miz & Ziggler vs. Rated RKO!

The Big Show comes out, all smiling and happy.  They show him being jumped by The Corre 2 weeks ago.  He turns from happy to pissed off.  He likens the attack to being in the Royal Rumble.  The Corre come out.  They have t-shirts now.  They surround the ring.  Show challenges any of them to fight one on one.  Slater jumps Show from behind.  A referee appears and rings the bell.

The Big Show vs. Heath Slater (w/ Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, & Justin Gabriel).  Show kicks Slater’s ass.  Slater takes out Show’s knee.  Show caves on Slater’s chest with a chop and makes his comeback.  Show hits the chokeslam for the pin in 1:17.  The rest of the Corre jump Show.  R-Truth, Chris Masters, Santino Marella, Vladimir Kozlov, and Daniel Bryan hit the ring and clear out The Corre.

Miz & Ziggler vs. Rated RKO is TONIGHT!

Beth Phoenix warns us to not try this at home, school, or anywhere else.

Royal Rumble “By The Numbers” video and hype.

WWE Champion The Miz and Alex Riley come out.  Cole mizzes his pants.  Miz cuts a promo about the Truman Doctrine of all things.  He says this has nothing to do with the Royal Rumble, then talks about Randy Orton.  Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero come out.  The main event is NEXT!

WWE Champion The Miz (w/ Alex Riley) & Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vickie Guerrero) vs. Rated RKO (World Heavyweight Champion Edge & Randy Orton).  Orton wants Miz, but of course, Ziggler starts.  They lock up.  Ziggler backs Orton into the corner and cheap shots him instead of giving a clean break.  Orton explodes with a clothesline and beats up Ziggler.  Miz annoys him from the apron, so Orton goes after him.  Orton chases Miz right into Ziggler, who beats him up.  Orton hits a Lou Thesz press with punches, then tags in Edge.  Edge hits a diving clothesline on Ziggler for 2.  Ziggler hits a face buster for 2.  Miz tags in and beats up Edge.  Orton tags in and beats up Miz.  He hits the powerslam and humps the mat.  Insta-commercials.  Ziggler beats up Orton.  The announcers blame the random cut away on technical difficulties.  Heels get the heat on Orton.  Miz hits the backbreaker/neckbreaker for 2.  Miz goes for the corner clothesline, but Orton explodes with a clothesline of his own.  Edge and Ziggler tag in.  Edge runs wild.  Edge goes for the spear.  Riley gets on the apron.  Edge decks him.  Edge hits the Edge-O-Matic on Ziggler.  Miz saves.  Clusterfuck ensues.  Orton takes Miz outside.  Edge avoids the Zig Zag and spears Ziggler for the pin (7:42 shown).  Fine match.  Vickie Guerrero screams that the spear is banned.  That’s fucking stupid.  She says if Edge uses the spear at the Rumble, Ziggler automatically wins the title.  I hate stupid stipulations like that.  So does Edge.  He spears Ziggler off the apron, then spears him twice more for good measure.  Man, they buried Ziggler six feet under tonight.

Pretty fun show.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 1/21/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 21, 2011 by Grappleholic

Highlights of Big Show/Wade Barrett from last week, with the formation of the new Barrett/Justin Gabriel/Heath Slater/Ezekiel Jackson group.

Josh Matthews, Michael Cole, and Matt Striker are the announcers.

Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, Justin Gabriel, and Heath Slater come to the ring.  Their group is called The Corre.  They all introduce themselves.  Teddy Long comes out to bitch at them for being assholes.  Barrett tries to explain why the Corre is good for Smackdown.  They banter for a bit.  Teddy insists that they play by the rules, then leaves.  Alberto Del Rio comes out to tell The Corre that they’re welcome here, but Smackdown is his show.  He cuts his usual promo about it being his destiny to win the Royal Rumble.  Insta-commercials.

Ricardo Rodriguez introduces Alberto Del Rio.

Alberto Del Rio vs. R-Truth.  Del Rio beats up Truth.  Truth hits a clothesline and Del Rio bails.  Truth beats him up on the outside.  Back inside, Truth avoids an elbow drop and covers for 2.  Truth works Del Rio’s arm.  Cut to backstage, where Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero have found Teddy Long unconscious.  Truth keeps beating up Del Rio.  Truth hits an avalanche-style Frankensteiner, then clotheslines Del Rio out of the ring.  Insta-commercials.  Truth boots Del Rio in the face and goes to the middle rope.  Del Rio pulls him down.  Cover gets 2.  Del Rio works Truth’s shoulder, then clamps on a rear chin lock.  Del Rio beats on Truth.  Cut to the back, where the paramedics are taking Teddy away.  I spot Tony Garea.  Truth makes his comeback and hits a front suplex for 2.  Del Rio rallies and hits an enzuigiri for 2.  Cole says Teddy Long has suffered trauma to the back of the head.  Truth hits a hip toss.  Rodriguez trips Truth.  Del Rio pulls Truth’s arm over the top rope, then gets the Minoru Special for the submission (6:42 shown).  This was pretty much just a backdrop for the angle with Teddy.

Teddy Long is loaded into an ambulance.  Vickie Guerrero, Dolph Ziggler, JTG, Rosa Mendez, Hornswoggle, Curt Hawkins, Michael Tarver, Trent Barreta, and Kaitlyn are seen looking on.

Vickie Guerrero and Dolph Ziggler come back into the office to find The Corre.  They say they had nothing to do with what happened to Teddy and offer their assistance.  She wants one of them to face Edge tonight and soften him up for Ziggler.

Royal Rumble “By The Numbers” video.

Tonight, Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Tony Chimel is the ring announcer.

Layla (w/ Michelle McCool) vs. Beth Phoenix.  They lock up.  Phoenix overpowers Layla.  Layla lands some kicks.  Phoenix does big swing and hits a clothesline for 2.  Layla hits a nifty rope walk armbreaker.  Cover gets 2.  Layla works Phoenix’s arm and applies a nifty hold.  Phoenix stands up with Layla and drops her to break it.  Phoenix makes her comeback.  Phoenix hits the slingshot suplex for 2.  Layla attacks Beth’s injured arm again.  Beth hits a backbreaker and the Glam Slam for the pin in 3:32.  It wasn’t awful.

Rey Mysterio is headed our way!

Tulsa!

Stand Up For WWE BS.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. “Dashing” Cody Rhodes.  Rhodes grabs a side headlock, then hits a clothesline.  Mysterio hits a flying headscissors.  Rhodes gets the advantage and works Mysterio’s knee.  Rhodes sends Mysteri outside.  Mysterio avoids a baseball slide dropkick, then hits a drop toehold into the steps.  Back inside, Mysterio hits the diving seated senton for 2.  Mysterio hits a rebound cross body for 2.  Rhodes hits a side Russian leg sweep for 2.  Mysterio rallies and hits the 619 and a diving splash for the pin in 4:02.  Fine little match.  Rhodes looks to have a broken nose or something.

Todd Grisham tries to give an update on Teddy Long.  Alex Riley interrupts.  He and WWE Champion The Miz are on Smackdown tonight.  Cole mizzes his pants.

Tonight, Edge vs. a member of The Corre!

The trainer tells Cody Rhodes that his nose is broken.  Rhodes looks in the mirror and freaks out.

Non-Title Amateur Wrestling Challenge: Jack Swagger vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston.  3 minute time limit.  Swagger gets a takedown.  Kofi escapes.  They keep doing boring amateur wrestling for a while.  Swagger dominates.  Kofi makes a comeback at the end, but Swagger wins 10-9.  Swagger jumps Kofi after the match.  Kofi kicks his ass, gives him the Trouble In Paradise, and hits a diving cross body, just because the crowd usually pops so big for it.

They show the brawl between Edge and Dolph Ziggler on The Cutting Edge last week.

Tonight, Edge vs. ?!

The announcer hype how the Smackdown ratings have gone up or something.

Trent Barreta vs. Drew McIntyre.  They show Barreta’s upset victory over McIntyre last week and the subsequent backstage attack and whatever is going on with Drew and Kelly Kelly.  McIntyre hits a belly to belly suplex, then pounds on Barreta.  McIntyre hits a snap suplex for 2.  Barreta rallies and hits a dropkick.  Barreta goes for a springboard rana, but McIntyre turns it into a powerbomb.  Cover gets 2.  McIntyre hits a hip toss off the top rope for the pin in 2:07.  McIntyre offers a handshake after the match, but Barreta decks him like a dick.  McIntyre righteously kicks his ass.  Kelly Kelly comes out and orders him to stop.  Hey, Barreta had it coming this time!  McIntyre tries to explain himself, but the dumb bimbo goes to check on Barreta instead.  Sorry, but this is a case of the heel being right.

Tonight, Edge vs. ?!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

WWE Champion The Miz and Alex Riley come out.  Cole mizzes all over himself.  Miz cuts a promo.  They show him and Riley beating down Randy Orton on Raw.  World Heavyweight Champion Edge comes out.  They banter.  Riley talks shit to Edge and gets speared.  Miz acts like he wants to fight, then bitches down.  The main event is NEXT!

Edge is in the ring.  The Corre come out.  Vickie Guerrero comes out and screeches in her horrible voice.  Dolph Ziggler comes out to do commentary.

Non-Title: World Heavyweight Champion Edge vs. Justin Gabriel (w/ Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, & Heath Slater).  Edge does some arm locks.  Gabriel throws a forearm.  This apparently pisses Edge off, because he starts kicking Gabriel’s ass.  Edge hits the Edge-O-Matic for 2.  Gabriel gets the advantage and beats up Edge.  Edge rallies and sends Gabriel to the floor.  Insta-commercials.  Gabriel gets a 2 count on Edge.  Gabriel hits a side Russian leg sweep and transitions into a weird hold.  Gabriel hits an STO and goes up top.  Edge wakes up and catches him with a dropkick.  Edge gives Gabriel an Edge-O-Matic against the ropes.  Edge goes up top.  Gabriel cuts him off and goes for a superplex.  Edge fights him off and hits a diving cross body for 2.  Edge goes for the spear.  Guys start getting on the apron.  Edge decks Barrett and Slater, but Jackson gives Edge a lariat.  Gabriel gets the pin (7:21 shown).  That’s a hell of a lariat.  Okayish match.  The Corre surrounds Edge and commence to beating him down.  They all give Edge their finishes and leave.  Ziggler places a foot on Edge and stands tall as the show ends.

Okay show.  It wasn’t awful, but it wasn’t anything great either.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 1/14/11

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 14, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, Big Show/Wade Barrett hype video, Smackdown open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Josh Matthews, Michael Cole, and Matt Striker are the announcers.  Tonight, The Cutting Edge with Dolph Ziggler!  Tony Chimel is the ring announcer.

Tony Chimel introduces Ricardo Rodriguez, who introduces Alberto Del Rio, who cuts a promo insulting the fans and saying he’ll win the Rumble and go to WrestleMania.  R-Truth comes out to tell him a bunch of superficial reasons why that won’t happen.  “Dashing” Cody Rhodes comes out and says he’ll win the Rumble.  Well now they’re just getting ridiculous.  Rey Mysterio Jr. comes out to talk about the superficial reasons he’s going to win the Rumble.  How many more guys are they going to bring out?  Everybody banters, then starts fighting.  Teddy Long comes out to make the tag match for NEXT!

Alberto Del Rio & Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. & R-Truth.  Rhodes beats up Mysterio.  Mysterio beats up Rhodes.  Del Rio tags in to renew his war with Mysterio and puts a beating on him.  Del Rio sends Mysterio outside and beats him up up the floor.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Rhodes tags in and missing a diving knee drop.  Mysterio tries to go up top, but Rhodes cuts him off and tries to set up a superplex.  Mysterio fights him off and hits a diving cross body.  R-Truth and Del Rio tag in.  Truth runs wild.  Sit-out front suplex gets 2.  Truth clotheslines Del Rio out of the ring, then sends Rhodes to the floor too.  Mysterio takes both opponents out with an Asai moonsault.  Insta-commercials.  Del Rio fights out of a side headlock from Truth.  Rhodes tags in and works over Truth.  Truth drops him on his face and beats him up.  Rhodes takes advantage of a distraction from Del Rio to deck Truth and get the upper hand.  The heels get the heat on Truth.  Truth gives Rhodes an electric chair drop and makes the hot tag to Mysterio.  Mysterio runs wild and hits a rebound cross body for 2.  They do a sweet cradle exchange.  Clusterfuck ensues.  Truth takes out Del Rio.  Rhodes takes out Truth.  Rhodes goes for the Alabama Slam, but Mysterio counters with a headscissors and hits the 619 and the springboard splash for the pin 10:30 shown).  Good little match.

Tonight, Show vs. Barrett!  Plus, the Cutting Edge!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Str8 Outta Brooklyn with JTG.  He talks about stuff.  I have no idea.

They show Wade Barrett attacking The Big Show during the four-way match last week.

Todd Grisham interviews Wade Barrett.  He’s going to take out the biggest, baddest dude on Smackdown because he’s Julius Caesar, or something.

Ezekiel Jackson returns SOON!

Trent Barreta vs. Drew McIntyre.  They show Barreta killing himself with a Space Flying Tiger Drop 2 weeks ago, and McIntyre jumping him like a dick after the match.  Barreta is good and pissed off now and beats up McIntyre.  The referee gets in his way, allowing McIntyre to kill him with a big boot and beat the shit out of him.  McIntyre pulls Barreta to the floor and rams his head into the announce table.  The referee looks dumbfounded.  McIntyre brings Barreta back into the ring and beats the shit out of him some more.  McIntyre lands a nice dropkick for 2, then applies a shoulder hold.  Barreta lands on his feet from a German suplex attempt and makes his comeback.  He goes for his fancy DDT, but McIntyre avoids it and hits a belly to belly suplex.  McIntyre tries to press slam Barreta to the floor.  Barreta counters and surprises McIntyre with a sunset flip for the pin in 3:26.  Holy upset, Batman!

The Big Show is headed our way!

Drew McIntyre jumps Trent Barreta backstage.  Kelly Kelly catches him.  McIntyre tries to make excuses.  Even she’s not dumb enough to buy it.

The Big Show vs. Wade Barrett.  Show beats the shit out of Barrett.  Barrett takes out Show’s knee and drops him with a big boot.  Barrett works Show’s knee.  Show rallies and beats up Barrett some more.  Barrett twice avoids the chokeslam.  Show goes for it a third time.  Heat Slater and Justin Gabriel appear to cause the DQ in 2:42.  Ezekiel Jackson appears and faces off with Show.  Barrett, Slater, and Gabriel jump Show.  He fights them off.  Jackson gets in the ring and clotheslines Show.  Slater gives Show a Complete Shot.  Jackson body slams Show.  Gabriel delivers the 450 splash.  The new quartet stands tall.

Moments ago, ^ WENT DOWN.

Michelle McCool (w/ Layla) vs. Beth Phoenix.  They lock up.  Phoenix picks skinny bitch up, rams her into the corner, and kicks her ass.  McCool avoids a charge in the corner and attacks Beth’s knee.  McCool works the knee.  Phoenix gets a schoolgirl for 2.  McCool recovers and keeps working the knee.  Phoenix uses the injured leg to power McCool over the top rope to the floor.  Back inside, Beth makes her comeback.  Beth channels Tully Blanchard and hits the slingshot suplex for 2.  Beth goes for the Glam Slam.  McCool kicks the injured knee and goes for a big boot.  Beth says “Fuck that” and goes her move again.  McCool counters into a front cradle.  Beth cuts it back and gets the pin in 4:06.  Not a bad little match.

Tonight, The Cutting Edge!

Birmingham!

Shawn Michaels Hall of Fame video.

Teddy Long bickers with Vickie Guerrero (w/ Dolph Ziggler) about what happened last week.  Teddy gets a phone call and goes to investigate something.  Ziggler and Vickie make up from their spat last week.

WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston is headed our way!

WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston comes out and cuts a promo about FINALLY regaining the Intercontinental Championship last week.  Jack Swagger interrupts and puts himself over.  He talks about his ankle lock for a while.  Kofi challenges him to a match.  I assumed that was the idea anyway, since a match was announced and there was a referee in the ring.

Non-Title: WWE Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger.  Kofi beats up Swagger.  Kofi jumps at Swagger in the corner.  Swagger meets him with boots, then sends him out of the ring.  Insta-commercials.  Swagger puts the boots to Kofi.  Swagger cranks on Kofi’s arm and shoulder.  Swagger hits a springboard Vader Bomb for 2.  Swagger keeps the heat going.  Kofi avoids a second Vader Bomb and rallies.  Swagger ducks the Trouble In Paradise and hits a belly to belly suplex for 2.  Kofi hits the S.O.S. for the pin out of nowhere (5:00 shown).  Swagger kicked out just after the three count.  Okayish match.  These two just don’t mesh well and I’ve seen them wrestle each other about 5 million times.

The Cutting Edge is NEXT!

World Heavyweight Champion Edge is out to do the Cutting Edge.  He says he dealt with one monster (Kane) last week, and now he has to deal with another (Vickie).  Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero come out.  Edge and Vickie banter.  Ziggler threatens to leave.  Edge insults Vickie some more.  Ziggler talks about how great Vickie is.  They show a video of Edge kissing Alicia Fox years ago that played during Edge & Vickie’s “wedding.”  They show a clip of Ziggler kissing Kaitlyn and getting caught by Primo and AJ 2 months ago.  Ziggler jumps Edge.  Edge records and kicks him in the face.  Ziggler bails.  Vickie screams and slaps Edge repeatedly.  Then she screams some more and jumps on his back.  Edge sets her down, then thinks about spearing her.  Ziggler pulls Edge out of the ring and and gives him the Zig Zag into the steps.  Ziggler and Vickie make out.  Fin.

Pretty solid show.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 12/31/10

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 22, 2011 by Grappleholic

WWE open, New Years Eve Smackdown hype, Smackdown open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Josh Matthews, Michael Cole, and Matt Striker are the announcers.  Tonight, Edge & Rey Mysterio vs. Kane & Alberto Del Rio!  Tony Chimel is the ring announcer.

WWE Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero come out.  Vickie makes horrible screeching noises like a pterodactyl.  They show John Cena trying to give Vickie the Attitude Adjustment last week.  She screeches some more.  Kofi Kingston comes out and tells Vickie to be quiet because everyone gets nauseous from listening to her.  Thank you, Kofi!  They show a photo of Vickie interfering at the PPV.  Jack Swagger comes out.  He’s also pissed off at the bullshit finish of the PPV match.  Ziggler says the only important thing is that he’s still champion.  Kofi says he doesn’t deserve it.  He wants a rematch.  So does Swagger.  Ziggler makes some excuse about Teddy Long’s New Years party.  He takes a swing at Kofi.  A three-way brawl erupts.  Kofi wins.  Teddy Long comes out and books a triple threat rematch for the title TONIGHT!

WWE.com plug.

The Big Show vs. “Dashing” Cody Rhodes.  Show beats up Rhodes and throws him around.  Show hits the loud chop, then does the stink face.  Rhodes bails and checks his jacket mirror.  Show palms his head and pulls him back into the ring.  Rhodes tries to rally, but continues being tossed about.  Rhodes avoids Show in the corner and hits the Beautiful Disaster.  Rhodes puts the boots to Show.  Show hits a shoulder block and goes the KO punch.  Rhodes bails and leaves.  Show wins by count-out in 2:51.  Fine.

Teddy Long’s New Years Party!  Guests include Kelly Kelly, Beth Phoenix, JTG, Hornswoggle, Rosa Mendez, Curt Hawkins, Drew McIntyre, Natalya, and what’s her face that just won divas NXT.  Kaitlyn, I think.  Rosa feeds Hornswoggle cheese.  Conor O’Brian from NXT sniffs the cheese.  His pro Alberto Del Rio (w/ Ricardo Rodriguez) tells him to cool it.  Del Rio hits on Rosa.  Hornswoggle takes offense.  Teddy asks people to make New Years Resolutions.  McIntyre says he’ll become a champion and a better person.  A drunk Chavo Guerrero Jr. insults everyone.  Teddy tells him he’s drinking non-alcoholic champagne.  Everyone glares at Chavo.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Drew McIntyre vs. Trent Barreta. They lock up.  Barrett throws McIntyre into the corner.  They lock up again.  McIntyre grabs a side headlock and releases it because he’s trying to be nice.  That’s just stupid.  McIntyre gets his head on straight and gets a headlock takedown.  Barreta bridges out and gets a headlock takedown of his own.  McIntyre backs Barreta into the corner and beats on him.  Barreta tries a rana, but McIntyre powerbombs him into the corner.  McIntyre beats up Barreta some more.  Barreta rallies and hits an enzuigiri for 2.  Barreta hits a springboard dropkick that sends McIntyre to the floor.  Barreta goes for a Space Flying Tiger Drop, but McIntyre avoids it!  Barreta looks dead.  The referee stops it and awards the win to McIntyre in 4:30.  Cool little match and a nifty ending.  McIntyre gives Barreta the Future Shock just to be a dick.  So much for being a better person!

Tonight, Kane & Del Rio vs. Edge & Mysterio!  Also, Ziggler vs. Kofi vs. Swagger!

Back at the party, Chavo cries to the Swagger Soaring Eagle.  They hug.  Teddy shakes his head at them, then tries to make his New Years Revolution.  Michelle McCool and Layla come in to be obnoxious.  They talk shit about Natalya and Beth, who argue with them.  Teddy books them in a tag match tonight, then talks to the eagle.

Tonight, IC title triple threat match!

World Heavyweight Champion Edge comes out.  The tag match is NEXT!

World Heavyweight Champion Edge & Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Kane & Alberto Del Rio.  Del Rio is introduced by Ricardo Rodriguez, of course.  Del Rio and Mysterio tear into each other briefly, then Edge tags in and beats up Del Rio.  Edge clotheslines Del Rio to the floor.  Kane comes in and sent outside by Mysterio.  Edge gives Mysterio a life to take their opponents out with a dive.  Insta-commercials.  Kane and Del Rio get the heat on Edge.  Mysterio gets the tag and runs wild.  Mysterio goes for a springboard cross body, but Kane catches him with a punch in midair.  Kane sends Mysterio outside to be beaten up by Del Rio.  Kane decides he wants in on the fun and throws Mysterio into the barricade.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Del Rio tags in and keeps the heat going on his enemy.  Mysterio continues playing face in peril for a bit, then makes the hot tag.  Edge runs wild on Del Rio.  Edge hits the Edgecution and goes for the spear.  That sequence of moves is completely back asswards.  Kane tries to chokeslam Edge, but fails.  Mysterio low bridges Kane out of the ring.  Edge gives Kane a baseball slide dropkick.  Mysterio gives Del Rio the 619.  Edge follows with the spear for the pin (9:19 shown).  Fine little match.

Back at the party, Chavo tries to impress Kaitlyn by sucking helium out of a balloon and talking funny, but there’s no helium.  Chris Masters and Hornswoggle wiggle their boobs at each other.  Big Show tells Kelly Kelly to be careful with Drew McIntyre.  Cody Rhodes comes in and argues with Show.  Teddy tells them to chill.  Teddy books Del Rio vs. Mysterio in a 2/3 Falls Match and Kane vs. Edge for the World Championship in a Last Man Standing Match for next week.

Tonight, IC Title triple threat match!

Michelle McCool & Layla vs. WWE Divas Champion Natalya & Beth Phoenix.  Beth and Natalya take turns beating up McCool.  McCool cuts off Natalya.  Insta-commercials.  Layla works over Natalya.  Beth tags in and is immediately cut off by McCool.  They get the heat on Beth.  Natalya gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Natalya goes for the Sharpshooter on Layla, but is countered.  She does it a different way and locks it in.  McCool kicks Natalya in the face and drags Layla over to tag her.  Natalya back body drops McCool and tags in Beth.  Beth hits the Glam Slam for the pin (6:39 shown).  All right match.

Teddy Long rejoices that the party didn’t break out into a fight.  Chavo calls the party lame.  Big Show pour punch on him.  Tyler Reks has also joined the party.  Chavo rams Hornswoggle’s face into the cake.  A food fight breaks out.  Teddy jinxed it.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Raw Rebound.

The main event is NEXT!

Triple Threat Match for the WWE Intercontinental Championship: Dolph Ziggler (c) (w/ Vickie Guerrero) vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger.  Swagger and Ziggler double team Kofi for the first several minutes.  Kofi makes his comeback, monkey flips Swagger, and gives Ziggler the corner punches.  Kofi sends both opponents outside and takes them both out with a tope suicida.  Insta-commercials.  Kofi cranks on Swagger’s arm.  Kofi goes for the Boom Drop, but Ziggler pulls him out of the ring and drops him.  Swagger tries to pull Ziggler into the ring, but Ziggler pulls his head across the top rope and hits the Fameasser for 2.  Swagger goes to the floor.  Ziggler brings Kofi back in and hits a neckbreaker for 2.  Ziggler hits an elbow drop for 2.  Ziggler keeps the heat on Kofi.  Swagger tries to come back in, but Ziggler cuts him off and keeps working on Kofi.  Kofi avoids Ziggler in the corner and starts firing back.  Matthews still doesn’t know what a Superman punch is.  Kofi hits the Boom Drop and goes for the Trouble In Paradise.  Swagger intervenes and Germans him right into Ziggler.  Swagger covers Ziggler for 2, then Kofi for the same.  Swagger sets up Kofi for a superplex.  Kofi fights him off.  Ziggler jumps up and tries to do the deed.  Swagger powerbombs Ziggler out of the corner.  Kofi hits Swagger with a diving cross body for 2.  Swagger counters the S.O.S. and takes on Kofi’s knee.  Kofi counters the ankle lock.  Swagger ducks the Trouble In Paradise.  Swagger locks in the ankle lock.  Ziggler gives Swagger the Zig Zag.  Kofi saves!  Kofi and Swagger brawl.  Kofi catches Swagger with a DDT and covers.  Vickie puts Swagger’s foot on the bottom rope.  Swagger goes for the Doctor Bomb.  Kofi counters and hits the Trouble In Paradise.  Ziggler schoolboys Kofi and grabs a handful of tights for the pin (13:53 shown).  Good match.

Next week, Del Rio vs. Mysterio 2/3 Falls!  Edge vs. Kane for the World Heavyweight Championship in a Last Man Standing Match!

All right show to end 2010 for WWE.

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 12/17/10

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 20, 2010 by Grappleholic

Smackdown open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Josh Matthews, Michael Cole, and Matt Striker are the announcers.  Tony Chimel is the ring announcer.

Edge comes out and cuts a promo.  They show a video recapping the WORST STORYLINE EVER between Edge, Kane, and Paul Bearer, complete with WACKY MUSIC~!  Edge wants to forget that it ever happened, and so do I, but what has been seen cannot be unseen.  Edge talks about what a dick Kane is, which somehow justifies Edge being a dick.  He’ll win the belt Sunday or whatever.

Video of The Miz on a talk show hosted by that idiot who was in that Taxi movie with Queen Latifah.

Tonight, The Miz vs. Rey Mysterio!  Commercials.

Edge talks to Teddy Long backstage.  They’re worried that Kane won’t show up for the PPV.  Alberto Del Rio and Rey Mysterio come in and bicker about who should get a title shot.  Long adds Mysterio and Del Rio to the TLC Match at the PPV.  It’ll be a three-way or a four-way, depending on whether or not Kane shows up.

Kofi Kingston & Kaval vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vickie Guerrero) & Jack Swagger.  Swagger and Kaval lock up.  Swagger beats on him.  They’re in the corner, so the referee gets in the way.  Kaval goes for a handspring attack, but Swagger catches him.  Kaval lands a spin kick for 2.  Kaval ranas Swagger out of the ring.  Kofi throws Ziggler outside.  Kofi and Kaval hit stereo suicide dives.  Commercials.  Swagger cranks on Kaval’s shoulders and neck.  The heels used nefarious tactics to get the advantage during the break.  They get the heat on Kaval.  Kaval lands on on his feet from a German suplex and ALMOST makes the tag, but Swagger cuts him off, so they keep the heat going.  Swagger goes for the Doctor Bomb, but Kaval turns it into a sunset flip into a double stomp.  Kofi gets the hot tag and runs wild on Ziggler.  Kofi hits the Boom Drop and goes for the Trouble In Paradise.  Ziggler ducks.  Kofi hits the S.O.S.  Swagger saves.  Kaval takes Swagger to the floor.  Ziggler gets a schoolboy.  Kofi rolls through and hits the Trouble In Paradise for the pin in 10:54.  Good little tag match.  Swagger decks Ziggler after the match.  Vickie screams at him.  I wish he’d give her the Doctor Bomb.

Jack Korpela interviews WWE Champion The Miz (w/ Alex Riley).  He’s on Smackdown because he’s super busy.  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

JTG does a segment called “Str8 Outta Brooklyn” where he just talks about random shit.

Kelly Kelly and Kaitlyn talk while Kelly does her makeup.  Drew McIntyre hits on Kelly.  Kaitlyn blows him off for her.  That was pointless.

Speaking of pointless, we get more Cody Rhodes grooming tips.  Commercials.

“Dashing” Cody Rhodes vs. Chris Masters.  Rhodes shoves Masters, then covers his face.  Masters hits him in the back, then slaps him and beats on him.  Masters hits a press slam.  Masters hits corner punches.  Rhodes hot shots him into the top rope and hits the Cross Rhodes for the pin in 1:07.  That was abrupt.

Rey Mysterio is headed our way!  Commercials.

Non-Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. WWE Champion The Miz (w/ Alex Riley).  They lock up.  Mysterio takes him down and goes for a sleeper.  Miz gets the ropes.  They lock up again.  Miz grabs a side head lock and hits a shoulder block.  Mysterio does the drop down, leapfrog, eat a clothesline bit.  Wait, that’s not how that usually goes, is it?  Cover gets 2.  Mysterio hits a flying headscissors, then stomps Miz in the corner and hits a running dropkick.  Mysterio goes up top.  Miz trips him.  Riley gets a cheap shot behind the referee’s back.  Miz hits a sliding dropkick on Mysterio against the post.  Miz applies a rear chin lock.  Mysterio gets out and eats a boot to the face.  Mysterio ducks a running kick and fights back.  Mysterio goes for the 619, but Miz bails.  Mysterio hits a baseball slide dropkick.  Riley helps Miz up, then takes Rey’s seated senton off the apron.  Miz boots Mysterio in the face.  Commercials.  Miz has Mysterio in the double arm pull into the knee thing.  Mysterio fights out.  Miz hits him with a modified uranage for 2.  Mysterio hits a spinning DDT and a rebound cross body for 2.  Miz ducks a Buzzsaw kick and sends Mysterio into the turnbuckles.  Miz hits the corner clothesline and goes up top.  Mysterio cuts him off and hits a top rope Frankensteiner!  Cover gets 2.  Mysterio goes for the 619.  Alex Riley gets on the apron.  Alberto Del Rio appears and trips Mysterio.  Miz gets a schoolboy for 2.  Mysterio dropkicks Del Rio through the ropes and goes for the diving splash on Miz.  Miz gets his knees up, then gets the pin 13:15.  Good match, much better than the Raw match, but with the same interference.  Del Rio attacks Mysterio.  Edge runs in for the save.  Edge and Mysterio fight off Miz and Del Rio.  Teddy Long comes out and books Miz & Del Rio vs. Edge & Mysterio for later tonight.  Damn, Mysterio and Miz just did an almost 15 minute match.  Commercials.

Smack of the Night: The Diva Battle Royal from Raw.

The Slammy Award winning and obnoxious Michelle McCool and Layla come out to be obnoxious… and Slammy Award winning.  They don’t want to do the match at the PPV.  WWE Divas Champion Natalya and Beth Phoenix bring out a gift wrapped table.  They banter.  LayCool are obnoxious some more.  Beth unwraps the table.  It has painting of LayCool as ugly witches.  They fight.  The heels escape getting put through the table… for now.

WWE Tag Team Champions Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov are headed our way!  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Non-Title: WWE Tag Team Champions Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr. & Tyler Reks.  Snatino grabs Reks in a side headlock.  Reks breaks free.  They shoulder block each other.  Neither fall, but Santino hurts himself and tags out.  Reks slams Kozlov.  Kozlov hits the battering ram headbutts.  Reks knocks him down and stomps on him.  Chavo tags himself in and hits a basement dropkick for 1.  Kozlov throws him off.  Kozlov hits a powerslam.  Santino tags in and hits Chavo with a judo throw for 2.  Chavo avoids the falling headbutt and beats on Santino.  Reks tags in and beats up Santino.  Cover gets 2.  Chavo tags in to keep the heat going.  He fails, as Santino immediately makes his comeback and makes the hot tag to Kozlov.  Chavo tries to cut him off, but Kozlov kicks his ass.  Chavo comes off the top, but Kozlov shoves him away, then pushes Reks off the apron.  Santino tags in and hits Chavo with the Cobra, followed by a schoolboy for the pin in 3:38.  Fun for what it was.

Tonight, Edge & Mysterio vs. Miz & Del Rio!  Commercials.

Ezekiel Jackson comes to Smackdown next week!  Why did they trade him to Raw in the first place then?

Raw Rebound.

TLC hype.

Tony Chimel introduces Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio.  The main event is NEXT!  Commercials!

WWE Champion The Miz (w/ Alex Riley) & Alberto Del Rio vs. Edge & Rey Mysterio Jr.  Miz and Edge lock up.  Edge grabs a side headlock and hits a shoulder block.  Edge takes Miz down with a headlock takeover.  Miz takes over and tags in Del Rio.  Del Rio hits a body slam for 2.  Del Rio applies a rear chin lock.  Stuff happens.  Miz tags back in.  Mysterio tags in and double teams Miz with Edge.  Cover gets 2.  Miz avoids Mysterio in the corner and Mysterio spears the post.  Miz hits a backdrop suplex for 2.  Del Rio tags in and keeps the heat on his enemy.  Mysterio takes his “sliding under the ropes to the floor” bump.  Del Rio puts the boots to him on the outside.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Mysterio continues to play face in peril until he rolls through the (mandatory in every Mysterio match) sunset flip and lands a head kick on Del Rio.  Edge and Miz tag in.  Edge runs wild.  Edge goes for the spear.  Riley trips him.  Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale.  Edge counters and hits the Edgecution.  Del Rio saves.  Cut the backstage, where Kane has killed people.  Mysterio hits the 619 on Del Rio.  Edge spears Miz.  World Heavyweight Champion Kane comes out and attacks Edge.  Del Rio attacks Mysterio.  Pretty much everyone comes out to break up the fight between Kane and Edge: Kaval, Kofi Kingston, Curt Hawkins, Trent Barreta, Drew McIntyre, JTG, Chris Masters, Dolph Ziggler, Vladimir Kozlov, Chavo Guerrero Jr., Jack Swagger, and Santino Marella.  Of course, Kane and Edge fight off the roster.  Kane chokeslams Barreta.  Edge spears Kane.  Fade to black.  I was digging this match until the non-finish.

Best Smackdown in many weeks.  By that I mean it was decent instead of fucking horrible.