Archive for Chavo Guerrero

WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 1/30/09 (Repost)

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2010 by Grappleholic

WWE open, then a highlight package of the Jeff Hardy/Edge match from the Royal Rumble when Matt Hardy turned on his brother and cost him the WWE Championship.

We are in Indianapolis, Indiana, as the ring announcer introduces Matt Hardy.  Matt comes out with a chair and no music.  Matt explains that he’s tired of sharing the spotlight with Jeff.  He says that nobody can prove he was responsible for Jeff’s various accidents as of late.  He spend his whole life taking care of Jeff, but he’s done with that.  He says he spent years trying to get the fans to like him, but they only cared about Jeff.  From now on, Matt only cares about himself.  Matt no longer considers Jeff his partner or his brother.

Instant commercial, then R-Truth makes his way to the ring as Jim Ross finally speaks.  He and Tazz are on commentary.

R-Truth vs. The Brian Kendrick (w/ Ezekiel Jackson).  Zeke stares down R-Truth, then the referee ejects him.  Kendrick cheap shots R-Truth as soon as the bell rings and goes on the offensive.  R-Truth makes a comeback and hits a scissors kick for the win at 2:14.

Tonight: Edge!

WrestleMania hype video, emphasizing WrestleMania I.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Montel Vontavious Porter.  MVP’s losing streak is over, as he won a match last week (I think).  Chavo gets in some shots, then MVP hits an armdrag and works Chavo’s arm a bit.  Chavo comes back with a rolling kick for a 2 count.  MVP beats on Chavo, then Chavo reciprocates in kind.  Chavo hits two amigos, but MVP counters the third.  Chavo goes upstairs, but MVP follows him up and goes for a superplex.  Chavo pushes him off and goes for a frog splash, but MVP moves.  MVP hits a Shining Yakuza kick (Drive By) for the win at 5:11.

Tazz steps in the ring and asks MVP how it feels to be back on a winning streak.  MVP says he’s back, and he wants the United States title back.

Umaga hype video.  He returns NEXT!

No Way Out has Elimination Chamber Matches!  Tonight, Undertaker vs. Mark Henry and Triple H vs. Great Khali vs. Vladimir Kozlov in Qualifying matches!

Umaga makes his way to the ring.  He has new music.  Commercial!

Umaga vs. Jimmy Wang Yang.  Yang tries to use his speed to get the advantage, but Umaga demolishes him.  Samoan Spike gets the win at 1:43.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry is next!

John Morrison says please, don’t try this at home.

Vladimir Kozlov is shown jumping rope and lifting weights.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: The Undertaker vs. Mark Henry (w/ Tony Atlas).  They grapple, then Undertaker runs into Henry and is knocked down.  They grapple again and Henry pushes Undertaker into the corner.  They break, then Undertaker fires away with punches.  Taker goes for Old School, but Henry catches him in a bearhug, then beats on him in the corner.  Henry hits a body slam and an elbow drop for a two count.  Taker fights back with more punches.  Taker goes for the chokeslam on Henry, but Atlas distracts him.  Henry sends Taker to the outside.  Taker nails Atlas, then heads back into the ring and hits the chokeslam.  Taker locks in the Gogoplata (whatever the hell it’s being called by WWE) for the submission victory at 5:25.

Next: Edge!

Chris Jericho/Mickey Rourke hype.  I thought Rourke pulled out of doing WrestleMania.

Smackdown GM Vickie Guerrero introduces the new WWE Champion, Edge.  He talks about the fans not believing him when he said he wasn’t behind Jeff’s accidents.  He then takes it old school with a five second pose, which his him making out with Vickie while holding up the championship belt.  Big Show’s music hits as he comes down to crash the party.  Show hugs Vickie, then she and Edge leave.

WrestleMania 21 video.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: The Big Show vs. Festus (w/ Jesse).  Festus, as always, gets angry when the bell rings.  He attacks Show, but promptly gets DDT’d.  Festus hits a sort of tornado DDT for a near fall.  Show hits the Alley-Oop that I haven’t seen him do in years.  Show hits the KO punch and gets the pin at 2:39.  Show chokeslams Jesse for good measure after the match.

Eve Torres starts to hype John Cena’s new movie, but Michelle McCool interrupts and berates her.  Eve slaps Michelle, who smiles.

Triple H vs. Khali vs. Kozlov, next!

From The Vault: Clip of the Chavo vs. Mysterio match from No Way Out 2004.  This must be a UK exclusive thing they do.  They show a big chunk of the match.  Chavo wins the Cruiserweight Championship with help from his father, Chavo Guerrero Sr.

Raw Rebound: Orton has explossive diahrea or something, and it made him kick Vince in the head.  Orton will sue Stephanie and the company if he’s fired, so she has Shane beat up Orton and a bunch of other people.  See: horrible ending from Raw.  Finally, it’s main event time.

Triple Threat Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Triple H vs. Great Khali (w/ Ranjin Singh) vs. Vladimir Kozlov.  Triple H fights Kozlov, then Khali.  Kozlov nails Khali.  Khali sends Kozlov out of the ring as we go to commercial.  The Miz says please, don’t try this at home.  Triple H and Khali brawl at ringside.  Triple H heads back into the ring to go at it with Kozlov.  Triple H takes a beating, then hits a DDT.  Kozlov hits a fall away slam for a near fall.  Triple H comes back and hits the spinebuster.  Khali lumbers back in and gets Triple H in the head grip.  Kozlov headbutts Khali.  Triple H low bridges Kozlov and sends him out of the ring.  Triple H hits a sloppy Pedigree on Khali for the win at 6:03+ commercials.  Triple H celebrates.  Fin.

WWE Monday Night Raw 11/15/10

Posted in WWE with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 15, 2010 by Grappleholic

The recognized symbol of excellence in sports entertainment!  Awesome Raw open with current starts in an old style open.  Pyro and ballyhoo!  Old school logos, sirens, etc.  Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are the announcers and are in old school attire.  Justin Roberts is the ring announcer.

Mean Gene Okerlund comes out to the old school interview podium.  He introduces “Cowboy” Bob Orton Jr.  He starts to introduce Randy, but Bob says he’s not there yet.  Okerlund interviews Orton about his son’s chances at Survivor Series.  He says something I didn’t catch that angers the crowd.  Wade Barrett comes out and chastises him about being old and whatnot.  The Miz and Alex Riley come out.  Miz talks about being a dick last week and his Money In The Bank privilege.  He says he might cash in tonight and fuck up the Survivor Series main event, somehow forcing Cena to stay in Nexus forever.  John Cena appears on the screen and tells Miz that he’s not going to allow any such frivolities and challenges Miz to a match tonight.  Miz accepts.  Commercials.  This is fun, with the old school set and music and all.

WWE.com plug.

Non-Title: WWE Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vickie Guerrero) vs. Mark Henry.  OLD SCHOOL INSET PROMOS DURING ENTRANCES!  Henry comes out to the Sexual Chocolate theme!  Ziggler goes for the sleeper hold.  Henry throws him out of the ring.  Blue ring apron, posts, and steps!  Red, white, and blue ring ropes!  Old school logos on the turnbuckle pads!  Referees wearing light blue shirts and bow ties!  This rules.  Henry beats up Ziggler.  Ziggler fails to apply the sleeper hold again.  Ziggler gets crotched on the top rope and falls to the floor.  Sexual Chocolate leers at Vickie, then press slams Ziggler back into the ring.  Ziggler dropkicks Henry’s knee and puts the boots to him.  Ziggler beats up Henry.  Henry hits a powerslam, but Ziggler gets a foot on the bottom rope.  Ziggler avoids getting squashed by a big splash and hits a Fameasser for 2.  Cole called it the Zig Zag because he’s mentally retarded.  Ziggler hits the Zig Zag for the pi… no, 2!  Amazingly, Cole didn’t call it the Fameasser.  Ziggler locks in a scissored sleeper and wins by referee stop in 4:27.  The environment made this way more fun to watch than it should have been.

The Hart Dynasty chat backstage about working through their problems.  They encounter Tony Atlas, who babbles about teaming with Rocky Johnson back in the day and rubs WD-40 onto his skin.  Hilarious.  Commercials.

Backstage, Tony Atlas is STILL rambling!  Yoshi Tatsu is listening, and feigns committing seppuku.

Non-Title: WWE Tag Team Champions Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater of The Nexus vs. The Hart Dynasty.  Smith and Slater start with a great wrestling exchange.  Gabriel throws some kicks, but Smith catches one and trips him.  Smith beats up Gabriel.  Smith hits ROLLING BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEXES for 2.  Slater saves.  Slater tags in.  Smith powerslams him and hits a leg drop for 2.  Smith goes for the running powerslam, but gets distracted by Gabriel.  Slater gets the advantage on Smith.  Nexus make quick tags and work Smith over.  Smith goes to tag in Kidd, but Kidd TURNS HEEL and kicks him in the head!  Gabriel hits the 450 splash on Smith for the pin in 3:05.  The Hart Dynasty has finally collapsed!

Mean Gene Okerlund interviews WWE Champion Randy Orton (w/ his dad, “Cowboy” Bob Orton Jr.).  R-Truth interrupts to tell him about how Cena is going to fuck him on Sunday.  Orton says he’s going to kick Cena in the head tonight to keep that from happening.  Commercials.

Random note: I also love the old school shirts everyone is wearing tonight.

Old school WWEShop.com plug with Mean Gene plugging old school merchandise!

Justin Roberts introduces Howard Finkel, who will be doing ring announcing for at least the next match.  He’s still awesome.  He should be doing ring announcing full time!  He introduces The Brooklyn Brawler (w/ Harvey Whippleman)!  They heel on the crowd and issue an open challenge to anyone from “the new school.”  ZEKE accepts!

The Brooklyn Brawler (w/ Harvey Whippleman) vs. Ezekiel Jackson.  Zeke hits a shoulder block.  Brawler talks shit, shoves Zeke, and tries to slam him.  Zeke mauls him.  Zeke hits the Book of Ezekiel for the pin in 50 seconds.  Awesome!

Tonight, John Cena vs. The Miz!  Old school match graphics!  Commercials!

The 5 lesser members of The Nexus are backstage.  David Otunga says that somebody needs to deal with R-Truth.  He calls himself “leader,” which Barrett overhears.  Barrett tells Otunga that he’ll be the one facing R-Truth tonight.  Cole gets an email from the iBooker 9000.  Shouldn’t they use an old computer for this?  iBooker says Otunga already has a “special” match tonight, so Barrett will face R-Truth tonight.  Barrett is fine with this.  Harris says they have his back, but Barrett says he’ll handle this.  John Cena comes in to talk about whatever.  Barrett orders Harris and McGillicutty to have Cena’s back tonight.  Cena declines.  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night, but it’s written OLD SCHOOL!

John Cena and The Miz (w/ Alex Riley) come out for their match.  They show Miz screwing Randy Orton in the 10-man tag last week.  Miz cuts a promo and sends Riley to fight in his stead.

John Cena vs. Alex Riley (w/ The Miz).  They lock up.  Cena hits a snap mare.  Cole babbles about not knowing what year it is.  Cena outclasses Riley some more.  Riley lands an elbow smash.  Miz decks Cena behind the referee’s back.  Riley pounds on Cena.  Cena fights back, but misses Riley in the corner and eats turnbuckle pads.  Riley beats up Cena some more.  Riley hits a move that we don’t see because the camera was focused on Miz for 2.  Retarded camera work in this match.  Cena makes his comeback.  Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment, then locks in the STF for the win in 3:43.  It was fine.

Randy Orton runs out and brawls with Miz.  Husky Harris and Michael McGillicutty jump Orton.  Orton kicks their asses.  Cena and Orton face off and brawl.  The old school referees and officials (including Tony Garea!) break them up.  Cole gets an email from the iBooker.  Ugh.  iBooker says that later tonight, Cena and Orton will be guests on Piper’s Pit!  Thank God we don’t have to suffer through another Orton/Cena match tonight.  Commercials!

The recognized symbol of excellence in sports entertainment!  They play that and the open again.  I don’t know why, and I don’t care.  It’s cool.

Cole and Lawler talk.

Howard Finkel introduces The Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff!  Volkoff sings the Soviet national anthem.  In 2010.  Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov come out.  Kozlov wants to sing the Soviet anthem with Volkoff!  They sing!  This rules!  Santino stops them because it’s awful.  He wants to sing his own song.  He brings out THE DOCTOR OF STYLE, SLICK!  SLICK COMES OUT TO JIVE SOUL BRO!  THIS IS THE GREATEST SHOW EVER!  Sheik babbles incoherently.  I can’t believe they gave that man a live mic.  The Usos come out.  We’ve got a tag title #1 Contender match next.  In the Usos’ corner will be JIMMY “SUPERFLY” SNUKA!  Commercials.

WWE Tag Team Championship #1 Contenders Match: Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jimmy & Jey Uso (w/ Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka & Tamina).  JIP.  The Usos get the heat on Santino.  Santino hits Jey with a judo throw and gator rolls him to the corner.  Kozlov tags in and hits Jey with a fall away slam.  Santino tags in and hits a slam thingy for 2.  Kozlov tags back in and beats up Jey some more.  Jimmy blind tags in and takes out Kozlov’s leg.  Jimmy hits a jumping headbutt for 2.  Jimmy hits a backdrop suplex for 2.  Jimmy works a rear chin lock.  Kozlov breaks free and knocks Jimmy across the ring with a battering ram headbutt.  Jey tags in and cuts Kozlov off from making the tag.  Santino gets knocked off the apron, then distracts the referee so his partner can get double teamed.  The Usos work over Kozlov.  Jimmy tries to knock Santino off again, but Santino decks him.  Kozlov makes the hot tag to Santino, who runs wild on Jimmy.  Confusion ensues.  Actually, I think that’s Jey getting run wild upon.  Santino hits the Cobra on Jey for the pin (about 5 1/2 minutes shown).  This wasn’t any good.

Sheamus runs in, drops Kozlov and the Usos, and goes after Santino.  Santino begs off.  John Morrison appears, low bridges Sheamus out of the ring, and knocks him off the apron with an enzuigiri.  Morrison says he keeps attacking Sheamus because Sheamus is a bully who will run away when confronted.  He challenges Sheamus to fight.  Sheamus does just as Morrison said he would and leaves.

Tonight, Piper’s Pit with Cena and Orton!  Commercials!

The Survivor Series song is some crappy song by some crappy band.

David Otunga vs. Kofi Kingston.  Inset promo from Kingston!  Kingston lands some leg kicks, then grabs a side headlock.  Otunga catches a cross body and slams Kingston.  Otunga slams Kingston again.  And again.  Cover gets 2.  Otunga grabs a headlock.  Kofi fights out.  Otunga hits what Cole calls an elbow but what looked to me like a back butt for 2.  Otunga grabs a chin lock.  Kofi fights back and starts his comeback.  Double clothesline spot.  George “The Animal” Steele comes out and teases eating the turnbuckle pad.  The referee stops him, so he eats one in a different corner.  Otunga is back on his feet and his like “WTF?”  Kofi gets up and rams his head into the exposed turnbuckle, then hits the Trouble In Paradise for the pin in 4:50.  Heh.

Gerald Brisco and Arn Anderson compliment John Morrison on dealing with Sheamus.  Sheamus hits Morrison with the pump kick out of nowhere and accepts his challenge for a match… at Survivor Series.  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Aksana walks around backstage with the Million Dollar Championship.  “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan shows up to tell her that her mom is there.  Huh?  It’s Dusty Rhodes with a curly blond wig.  He has Kelly Kelly drop a net on her.  Goldust steals the Million Dollar belt back from her.  He returns the belt to it’s rightful owner, “The Million Dollar Man” Ted Dibiase.  Irwin R. Schyster promises to find him a good tax shelter.  Dibiase tries to give the belt back to his son, Ted Dibiase Jr., but Jr. doesn’t want it.  Cody Rhodes says “that ended far from dashing.”  Goldust and Cody walk away.  Dusty says “I raised some weird kids.”  They play Dusty’s “Common Man” theme.  Dusty, Tatanka, and Hacksaw dance. Ron Simmons sees this and says “DAMN!”  Funny stuff.

Earlier tonight, SHIT WENT DOWN between John Cena and Randy Orton.

R-Truth and Eve Torres are headed our way!  Commercials!

WWE.com plug.

“Promotional Consideration Paid For By The Following…”  R.D. Reynolds just WrestleCrapped his pants.

R-Truth (w/ Eve Torres) vs. Wade Barrett.  They brawl.  Truth flips around and hits the break dancing kick.  Truth clotheslines Barrett out of the ring and hits him with a somersault dive.  Back inside, Truth goes up top.  Barrett goes to cut him off.  Truth jumps over him, but Barrett catches Truth with a sidewalk slam.  Barrett his a suplex for 2.  Barrett hits a diving elbow drop for 2.  Barrett his a backbreaker for 2.  John Cena and Randy Orton are both show watching backstage.  Truth gets an inside cradle that we almost missed for 2.  Barrett applies a rear chin lock.  Truth makes his comeback and gets a fancy cradle for 2.  Truth hits a front suplex for 2.  Barrett avoids the scissors kick and goes for the Wasteland.  Truth counters, but gets booted in the face.  Barrett hits the Wasteland for the pin in 5:06.  It was fine.

Tonight, Cena and Orton on Piper’s Pit!  Commercials!

They play the opens again.

Cole and Lawler goof off.

Ricardo Rodriguez is here!  That’s 3 ring announcers tonight.  Tito Santana comes out to cut him off and introduces Alberto Del Rio himself!  Del Rio has Chavo Classic driving him!  Del Rio cuts a promo.  He wants the other legends to kiss his ass like Tito and Chavo.  Sergeant Slaughter comes out and cuts an awesome promo.  “Shut your hole, puke, and listen up!  There’s 2 things you don’t mess with: Legends and America!”  He challenges Del Rio to a match.  Del Rio accepts.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sergeant Slaughter.  Del Rio beats on Slaughter.  Slaughter locks in the Cobra Clutch.  Del Rio gets a rope break and elbows Sarge in the face.  Del Rio hits a clothesline for 2.  Del Rio applies a rear chin lock.  Slaughter fights out.  Del Rio beats him up some more.  Sarge locks in the Cobra Clutch again.  Del Rio backs him into the corner and breaks free, then whips Sarge into the corner and hits an enzuigiri for the pin in 1:54.  It was what it was.  Del Rio applies the cross armbreaker after the match.  MVP comes out and runs off Del Rio.

Mean Gene plugs WWE merchandise again.  Commercials.

Cole and Lawler talk.  Cole is being a dick,

WrestleMania tickets went on sale last weekend!

Mean Gene Okerlund brings out Mae Young!  She’s escorted by the Bella Twins.  Poor thing.  They show a really old black & white picture.  Mae was a babe in her day.  They show a video package on some of her exploits.  Unified WWE Divas Champions Michelle McCool & Layla come out to be obnoxious bitches and ruin a feel good moment.  Mae Young wants a match “with these sluts!”  She’s a feisty old gal!  “You little bitches, let’s go!”  LayCool laugh.  The bell rings.  This is a real match!  Falls count anywhere!

Handicap Falls Count Anywhere Match: Mae Young (w/ The Bella Twins) vs. Unified WWE Divas Champions Michelle McCool & Layla.  Natalya, Gail Kim, Melina, and Eve Torres come out and beat up LayCool.  Mae slaps Layla and pins her in 54 seconds!  Awesome!  Commercials!  That was AWESOME!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Howard Finkel introduces JIM ROSS to do commentary on the next match!  YAY!  Michael Cole is not happy about this.

Non-Title: WWE United States Champion Daniel Bryan vs. Jack Swagger.  It’s so good to hear J.R. again.  Bryan and Swagger lock up.  Awesome grappling.  Danielson counters out of the ankle lock and lands a Mirko Cro Cop head kick.  Cole needs to shut the fuck up and let J.R. talk.  More awesome grappling on the mat.  Danielson leapfrogs Swagger and  lands a dropkick for 1.  Danielson back flips over Swagger and gets booted in the face.  Commercials.  Cole needs to SHUT THE FUCK UP AND STOP RUINING THE MOMENT.  Jim Ross welcomes us back to Raw as Swagger has Bryan in a hold.  Cole is BEING A FUCKING IGNORANT PRICK AND NEEDS TO FUCK OFF AND DIE.  Swagger beats up Bryan.  Swagger gator rolls Bryan out of the ring and pounds him on the apron.  I’d give my right nut for the chance to punch Michael Cole in the face right now.  Bryan low bridges Swagger out of the ring.  COLE NEEDS TO FUCK OFF.  Danielson lands a baseball slide dropkick, then hits a flying knee off the apron!  STOP CUTTING TO COLE, YOU FUCKS!  Back inside, Danielson hits a missile dropkick for 2.  Bryan kicks the crap out of Swagger.  Swagger catches his leg and goes for the ankle lock.  Bryan flips Swagger into the corner, then misses Swagger in the corner and hurts himself.  SHUT UP, COLE!  Swagger hits a Vader Bomb for 2.  Lawler finally tells Cole to “shut the hell up.”  Swagger hits another Vader Bomb.  He goes for the Doctor Bomb, but Danielson dead weights him and goes for the LeBell Lock.  Swagger counters into a backbreaker.  Danielson counters the Doctor Bomb again and lands the high kick for the pin in 10:44.  Awesome match that even Cole’s retardation couldn’t ruin.  Ted Dibiase Jr. appears and hits Bryan with the Dream Street, then poses with the United States title belt as his awful music plays.  Maryse comes out just so they can leave together.  Cole needs to fuck off and die.

Survivor Series hype.

J.R. slaps Cole with his cowboy hat!  YAY!

Orton and Cena are headed our way!  Commercials!

Promotional consideration paid for by the following!

Justin Roberts introduces the legends to the crowd: Jimmy Snuka, Bob Orton Jr., Irwin R. Schyster, Tito Santana, Sergeant Slaughter, Jim Duggan, Brooklyn Brawler, Chavo Classic, Mean Gene Okerlund, Howard Finkel, Mae Young, Gerald Brisco, Ted Dibiase, Slick, Tatanka, Tony Atlas, Arn Anderson, Ron Simmons, Dusty Rhodes, George Steele, Jim Ross, The Iron Sheik, and Nikolai Volkoff.  That’s nice!  “Hey, here’s a bunch of our agents and other guys we’ve fired a bunch of times!” -My buddy mhirn.

“Rowdy” Roddy Piper comes out to do Piper’s Pit!  He cuts a promo, then introduces John Cena.  Piper bitches at Cena about disrespecting legends by possibly giving Wade Barrett the WWE Championship this Sunday.  He urges Cena to do the ring thing.  Cena replies at length about his respect for the legends.  He says he’ll call the match right down the middle.  That means he’s going to screw someone.  Wade Barrett comes out and says that’s fine, because he doesn’t need help to win, but Cena is still fired if Barrett loses.  Piper bitches Barrett out in awesome crazy old man style.  Barrett bitches at Piper, then Cena.  He forces Cena to put on a Nexus t-shirt.  Why the hell is he just now doing that?  Cena puts the shirt on, then tells Barrett he’s going to turn his face into mush on Sunday.  Barrett says Nexus will kick Cena’s ass before he can hurt Barrett.  WWE Champion Randy Orton comes out, talks to Cena for a minute, then beats up Barrett.  Orton humps the mat.  Cena intervenes before Orton can hit the RKO or come or whatever he’s trying to do.  Orton RKOs Cena and goes for the PUNT OF DEATH.  Barrett cuts him off.  Cena avoids the punt and hits the Attitude Adjustment.  Barrett orders Cena to raise his hand.  Cena gives Barrett the Attitude Adjustment instead.  He takes off the Nexus shirt and throws it on Barrett.  Piper raises Cena’s hand to close the show.  Why isn’t Miz cashing in right now while the getting is good?

I don’t care if most of the wrestling sucked (I say “most” because Bryan vs. Swagger was awesome), this show ruled!

AWA SuperClash III

Posted in AWA with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 4, 2010 by Grappleholic

Larry Nelson introduces the show.  Lee Marshall joins him.  This a very old video, and not the best quality.  I hope I can get through it.  Marshall and Ray Stevens are the announcers.  Gary Michael Cappetta is the ring announcer.  He introduces various people.  The audio and video are kind of out of sync.  I hope that doesn’t drive me too insane.

Cactus Jack & AWA Southern Tag Team Champions The Rock & Roll RPMs vs. Chavo, Mando, & Hector Guerrero.  Hector does some break dancing, then avoids being doubled teamed by the RPMs.  He takes them over with a headlock/head scissors combo.  Cactus and Mando tag in.  Mando gets a sunset flip, but puts him into the ropes.  Cactus throws some punches and sends Mando out of the ring.  Cactus follows him out and gets backdropped on the concrete.  The Guerreros works Cactus’ leg.  Cactus tags in one of the RPMs.  Chavo takes him over with a head scissors.  The Guerreros do flippy stuff to the RPMs as a clusterfuck ensues.  When I finally figure out which RPM is which, Cactus comes back in and beats up Chavo.  The RPMs and Cactus take turns beating up Chavo.  Hector tags in and dropkicks everybody.  Another clusterfuck ensues.  Mike Davis accidentally clotheslines Tommy Lane.  The Guerreros dispose of the heels.  Chavo pins Lane with a moonsault body block in 6:33.  Fun little opener.

Larry Nelson interviews the POWW Champion Nina (the future Ivory).

WCCW World Light Heavyweight Championship Match: Jeff Jarrett (c) vs. Eric Embry.  They lock up.  They break and lock up again.  Repeat.  They trade hammerlocks in a fast and furious fashion.  Repeat.  They counter hip toss attempts, then shove each other.  Jarrett works Embry’s arm.  Embry escapes and drops Jarrett with a lariat.  Embry dodges a cross body, causing Jarrett to take a bump on his shoulder.  Jarrett rolls to the floor and sells it.  Jarrett makes it back in.  Embry attacks the injured shoulder.  Jarrett rallies and hits a missile dropkick, but hurts his shoulder.  Jarrett gets a sunset flip for 2, then a backslide for 2, then an inside cradle for 2, then another sunset flip.  Embry counters it and pins Jarrett with a prawn hold in 4:14.  Fine little match.  Embry regains the title for the fourth time, according to Cappetta.  Lee Marshall interviews Embry.  Embry says he’ll give Jarrett a rematch anytime, then goes to the back to check on his condition.  What a nice guy.

Larry Nelson interviews The Terrorist.

Jimmy Valiant vs. Wayne Bloom.  Bloom jumps Valiant and kicks his ass.  Valiant kicks Bloom’s ass back.  Valiant gets the pin with an elbow drop in 25 seconds.  Whatever.

Larry Nelson interviews some guy and Bambi.  The guy is POWW promoter David McClane.  POWW is a women’s promotion and they’re doing some stupid Lingerie Street Fight Battle Royal.

Verne Gagne has at some point replaced Ray Stevens on commentary.

WCCW Texas Heavyweight Championship Match: Iceman King Parsons (c) vs. Brickhouse Brown.  They shove each other.  Brown grabs a side headlock, then drops Parsons with a shoulder block and a dropkick.  Parsons bails.  Back inside, they lock up.  Brown works a headlock for a couple of hours.  He drops Parsons twice more with shoulder blocks, then hits a fucked up spinning backslide for 2.  Parsons bails again.  Brown works the headlock for another day or so.  Parsons escapes and hits a butt butt.  Parsons hits a weak clothesline for 2.  Parsons hits a suplex for 2.  Brown hits a cross body for 2.  Parsons knocks Brown down with some punches for 2.  He argues with the ref.  Trust me, Iceman, I wish this match was over, too.  Parsons tries a piledriver, but fails and gets backdropped.  Brown makes his comeback.  Parsons begs off.  Brown puts the boots to him in the corner, then beats him up some more.  Brown hits a half assed cross body and covers.  He thinks he got the pin, but Parsons’ foot was on the ropes.  Parsons punches Brown with and gets the pin in 5:42.  This sucked.  Marshall interviews Parsons.  Ugh.

Larry Nelson interviews Brandi Mae and Pocahontas.  This whole stupid match is about the Terrorist ripping up Brandi’s shorts.  Pocohantas promises to war dance tonight.  That David guy strikes me as a sleaze ball.

There’s some kind of convoluted six-person tag.  Cappetta says the titles are on the the line, so whatever.  Diamond Dallas Page interrupts the ring announcing.  Whatever, let’s just get this over with.

AWA World Tag Team Championship & AWA World Women’s Championship Match: Badd Company (c) & Madusa Miceli (w/ Diamond Dallas Page) vs. The Top Guns & Wendi Richter (c).  Everybody brawls.  The faces whip the heels into each other.  The Top Guns double team Pat Tanaka.  Dukes works over Tanaka.  Diamond tags in and beats up Dukes.  Diamond misses Dukes in the corner.  Richter tags in and tries to pull Madusa in the ring.  Madusa pulls across the top rope, then comes in the ring and beats her up.  Richter fights back and throws her around.  Richter missed a dropkick.  Richter hits a powerbomb, but Diamond saves.  Clusterfuck ensues.  Tanaka savate kicks Richter, then accidentally kicks Madusa.  Richter pins Madusa in 5:44.  The Top Guns spank Madusa.  The Top Guns are announced as the World Tag Team Champions, but history says otherwise.  I don’t know what the fuck happened there, and I don’t care.  The heels bitch at Lee Marshall.  Madusa slaps Tanaka and Page.  Badd Company and Page yell abuse at Madusa after she leaves and call her a bimbo.

Lee Marshall interviews WCCW World Heavyweight Champion Kerry Von Erich, with his young daughter Holly.  He says he’ll prove tonight that he’s the one and only World Heavyweight Champion.

AWA International Television Championship Match: Ron Garvin vs. Greg Gagne.  Stevens is back on commentary now.  Make up your minds!  The title is held up.  They lock up.  Garvin beats up Gagne.  Yay!  Gagne beats up Garvin.  Boo!  Garvin beats up Gagne some more.  Gagne back body drops Garvin for 2.  Gagne works Garvin’s arm.  Garvin fights back and beats up Gagne.  Garvin gets an inside cradle for 2.  I swear it sounds like Marshall keeps calling him “Garmin.”  They end up stuck on the ropes for a minute, then Garvin beats up Gagne on the outside.  Gagne makes it back inside and wins by count-out in 5:52.  Garvin puts Gagne in a sleeper.  Gagne escapes and puts Garvin in a sleeper.  THE FUCKING MATCH IS OVER, STOP TORTURING ME!  Gagne wins the vacant title.  This sucked.  A lot.  Marshall interviews Gagne.  I don’t care.

Still to come, the stupid 80’s eye candy match.

Larry Nelson interviews Verne Gagne.  Diamond Dallas Page interrupts.  He leaves, and Verne keeps talking.  Fuck.  And there are a lot of matches still to come.  Double fuck.

They a clip of a Jerry Lawler/Kerry Von Erich match from Memphis.

Nelson interviews the AWA World Heavyweight Champion, Jerry “The King” Lawler.

Cappetta introduces that annoying sleazy David McLane to do the ring announcing for the stupid women’s match.

Beverly Hills Lingerie Street Fight Battle Royal featuring Laurie Lynn, Luna Vachon, Peggy Lee Leather, Pali the Syrian Terrorist, Malibu, Bambi, Pocahontas, Brandi Mae, and POWW Champion Nina.  They fight.  It sucks.  They’re all in street clothes.  People get eliminated.  It comes down to Pali and Brandi Mae.  They fight horribly.  Brandi rips a Pali’s weird leotard thing.  Pali chokes Brandi with her stockings or something.  Fuck, I want this to end.  Pali eliminates Brandi and wins after a horribly long 8:33.  It was terrible.  Pali talks, then Marshall interviews her so she can talk some more.

Larry Nelson interviews Peggy Lee Leather.  Luna interrupts and cuts a weird promo.  This segment sucks too.

Lee Marshall puts over random people.  He talks to PWI Editor Bill Apter.  Apter is going to present an award to Jerry “The King” Lawler.

Larry Nelson interviews Sergeant Slaughter.

Boot Camp Match: Colonel DeBeers (w/ Diamond Dallas Page) vs. Sergeant Slaughter.  Sarge beats the shit out of DeBeers to start.  I didn’t hear an opening bell.  Maybe they don’t need one, since this is anything goes.  I don’t know.  DeBeers gets the shit beat out of him, then chokes Sarge with something.  Sarge stops being choked and beats up DeBeers some more.  They fight outside.  Page steals Sarge’s combat helmet.  DeBeers hits Slaughter with one of the things that they string a rope in that I guess does service for a guardrail here.  Page gives DeBeers Sarge’s helmet.  Page holds Sarge for DeBeers to hit.  Sarge ducks and Page gets knocked off of the apron.  Sarge makes a comeback and takes his helmet back.  Sarge headbutts DeBeers with the helmet a bunch of times.  Sarge hits a clothesline (the Slaughter Cannon), then locks in the Cobra Clutch.  Sarge wins by submission in about 6 minutes.  Sheik Adnan El Kaissey runs and The Iron Sheik run in and they all beat up Sarge.  The Guerreros make the save!  Sarge takes a swing at Chavo.  That dick.  Sarge goes after the Iron Sheik.  Shit eventually calms down and Marshall interviews Slaughter.  This match sucked.  Sarge recites the pledge of allegiance.

Larry Nelson is with Bill Apter and Jerry Lawler.  Apter presents Lawler with the Most Inspirational Wrestler of the Year Award.

WCCW World Tag Team Championship Match: The Samoan Swat Team (c) (w/ Buddy Roberts) vs. Michael Hayes & Steve Cox.  Samu and Hayes lock up.  They hammer each other in the corner.  Hayes whips Samu into Cox’s boot.  Cox tags in and twists Samu’s arm.  Fatu runs in and nails Cox, but Cox doesn’t let go.  Hayes runs over and knocks Fatu off of the apron.  Cox avoids a cross body and hits an arm drag on Samu, then cranks on the arm again.  Samu accidentally clocks Fatu and knocks him off the apron again.  The exact same thing happens again a minute later.  The SST finally manage to get heat on Cox.  Fatu puts him in a nerve hold.  Cox hits the ropes and knocks Samu off the apron, then he and Fatu clothesline each other.  Hayes gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Cox takes out Samu with a dive to the outside.  Hayes hits a DDT on Fatu.  Roberts comes in behind the referee’s back and hits Hayes in the back of the head with something, allowing Fatu to get the pin in 7:53.  Decent enough match.

Larry Nelson interviews the Iron Sheik and Sheik Adnan El Kaissey.

Prior to the strap match, Cappetta introduces a special guest, the IWGP Heavyweight Champion, Tatsumi Fujinami!  Fernandez bad mouths Fujinami.  Fujinami holds Fernandez to let Wahoo nail him!

Indian Strap Match: Manny Fernandez vs. Wahoo McDaniel.  Wahoo whips Manny’s hand with the strap.  Ouch.  Wahoo shows his expertise with the strap, using it to snapmare Fernandez, then choke him, then whip him.  Fernandez gets the advantage and beats up Wahoo.  Wahoo is BUSTED WIDE OPEN!  Manny touches one corner before Wahoo cuts him off.  They trade chops.  Manny gets BUSTED WIDE OPEN as well.  Wahoo beats him up.  Wahoo touches 3 corners before Manny manages to cut him off.  Fernandez hits a diving knee drop.  Manny goes up top, stupidly, and Wahoo pulls him off by the strap, predictably.  Wahoo touches 3 corners.  Manny kicks him into the 4th corner to give Wahoo the win in 7:49.  Manny keeps beating on Wahoo, but Fujinami makes the save!  Lee Marshall interviews Wahoo.

Larry Nelson interviews Verne Gagne and AWA President Stanley Blackburn.

Al Lerner (who?) is the guest ring announcer for the main event.  Lawler and Von Erich both cut promos before the match.

Title Unification Match: AWA World Heavyweight Champion Jerry “The King” Lawler vs. WCCW World Heavyweight Champion “The Modern Day Warrior” Kerry Von Erich.  Lawler plays chickenshit to start.  Lawler rams Von Erich’s arm into the top turnbuckle to “bust it open” (Kerry had cut his arm open before the match because he was coked up or something).  They lock up.  Von Erich hits Lawler with a punch that sends him ass over teakettle.  Kerry hits Lawler with a vicious clothesline.  Repeat.  They lock up again.  Lawler avoids a clothesline… but gets clotheslined again anyway.  WCCW booker Frank Dusek is at ringside.  Kerry wants a test of strength.  Lawler stupidly obliges.  Kerry hits a discus lariat for a pair of 2 counts.  They roll around on the mat.  Lawler hits Von Erich with some great punches and knocks him out of the ring.  Kerry goes for a slingshot splash, but Lawler catches him with his knees.  Lawler hits a piledriver.  Kerry no sells it.  Lawler struts around and turns around into a tornado punch.  Kerry covers for 2.  Kerry goes for the Claw, but Lawler fights it.  Lawler avoids a knee drop.  Lawler gets a cover, but Kerry throws him on top of the referee.  Kerry hits a piledriver, but by the time the referee wakes up, Lawler manages to kick out at 2.  Kerry beats up Lawler some more.  Kerry goes for a tornado punch outside, but Lawler ducks and Kerry punches the post.  Lawler pulls an object out of his tights and hits Von Erich with it, then hits a diving fist drop.  Lawler hits another fist drop, then another diving one with his object.  Kerry catches him with the Claw to the stomach.  Kerry is BUSTED WIDE OPEN!  Kerry shifts the Claw to Lawler’s forehead.  Lawler gets a rope break.  Kerry puts the Claw back on.  They get up.  Lawler avoids Kerry in the corner and Kerry hits the turnbuckles.  Kerry punches Lawler some.  Lawler hits Kerry with his object again.  Frank Dusek yells.  It’s No DQ, so quit your bitching!  Lawler punches Kerry’s blood forehead.  Lawler goes into his Muhammad Ali routine and hits Kerry with a bunch of jabs.  Lawler punches Kerry with his object again.  Kerry falls out of the ring, where Dusek checks on him.  Kerry comes back in.  The referee checks the cut.  Lawler punches him again.  They trade punches.  Kerry beats up Lawler.  The punch each other down.  Kerry covers for 2, then applies the Claw again.  Lawler gets his shoulder up repeatedly.  The referee stops it due to Kerry’s blood loss at 18:53.  Lawler is awarded the match, despite being down and out.  Dusek bitches at the referee.  Kerry leaves with the belts.  Lawler did what he could to hold the match together, but it wasn’t very good.  Lawler is announced as the winner, despite the fact that Kerry stole the belts, presumably to buy more coke.  Marshall interviews Lawler after the match.

Larry Nelson interviews the bloody mess that is Kerry Von Erich.  They show clips of the match.  Stanley Blackburn defends the referee’s decision.

The Stud Stable (w/ Sylvia) vs. The Rock & Roll Express.  Ricky Morton and Jimmy Golden start.  Morton hits an arm drag.  Robert Fuller comes in and gets arm dragged, too.  Robert Gibson comes in and everybody brawls.  Studs bail.  Morton holds Golden in a front face lock for a bit.  Everybody ends up in the ring fighting again.  Studs bail again.  Gibson and Fuller run the ropes.  Golden knees Gibson in the back from the apron.  Fuller sends Gibson out of the ring.  Sylvia whacks Gibson with her big stick.  Studs beat up Gibson.  Gibson gets thrown out and beaten with the stick again.  Golden puts Gibson in an abdominal stretch, using the ropers for leverage.  Gibson gets free.  Morton tags in and half assed runs wild.  Clusterfuck ensues again.  R&R hit a double dropkick on one of them.  They all brawl, leading to a double DQ in 7:03.  Whatever.  Marshall interviews the Rock & Roll Express.

Larry Nelson interviews the Stud Stable.

Lee Marshall interviews Verne Gagne at ringside.

And finally this horrible fucking show ends.  Aside from a couple of good short matches at the beginning, this show sucked in pretty much every way.