WWE Monday Night Raw 11/29/10

WWE open, video of what went down last week, Raw open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and CM Punk are the announcers.  We are LIVE in Philadelphia for King of the Ring!  Tonight, WWE Champion The Miz will be here!

They show the king’s throne on the stage.

Alex Riley comes out SUITED UP!  Punk gets in a jab about Riley being dressed for court.  Riley makes reference to it himself, saying he’s not afraid of a party.  Riley rants and raves about how awesome The Miz is.

Justin Roberts is the ring announcer.  He introduces Ricardo Rodriguez (sporting a black eye from Smackdown) to introduce Alberto Del Rio.  They show a shot of the announcers and Punk can be seen wearing a Colt Cabana t-shirt.

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: Alberto Del Rio vs. WWE United States Champion Daniel Bryan.  They lock up.  Del Rio backs Bryan into the corner, breaks, and cheap shots him.  Del Rio works a side headlock on the mat.  Bryan turns it into a cradle in one of my favorite spots.  Del Rio hits a shoulder block.  Bryan does the leapfrog, drop down, dropkick for 2.  Del Rio sends Bryan into the turnbuckles, then hits a spinebuster.  Bryan goes for the LeBell Lock, but Del Rio gets a rope break and bails.  Commercials.  Del Rio has Bryan in a rear chin lock.  He took over during the break when he knocked Bryan off the apron with an enzuigiri.  Del Rio throws Bryan to the mat and covers for 2.  Del Rio gets the heat on Bryan, reapplying his rear chin lock.  Bryan fights out, but Del Rio clubbers his back.  Del Rio hits a body slam and goes for some kind of diving spinning move, but Bryan avoids it.  Bryan gets a reverse cradle for 2.  Bryan gets a crucifix hold for 2.  Bryan lands some European uppercuts, then back flips over Del Rio from the corner.  They switch waist locks.  Bryan hits a nice German suplex hold for 2.  Bryan telegraphs a back body drop and gets kicked in the head.  Bryan reciprocates with a high kick and hits a corner dropkick for 2.  Bryan blasts Del Rio with kicks.  Del Rio hits a gorgeous German suplex hold of his own for 2.  Del Rio charges the ropes, but Bryan avoids him and hits a tope suicida.  Back inside, Bryan goes for a missile dropkick, but Del Rio avoids it.  Bryan has injured his shoulder.  Del Rio hits the Minoru Special for the submission in 9:40.  Really good little match.  Del Rio advances to face the winner of John Morrison/Cody Rhodes.

They show video of some previous King of the Ring winners: Edge (2001), Stone Cold Steve Austin (1996), Triple H (1997), Bret Hart (1991/1993), and Brock Lesnar (2002).  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

R-Truth raps his way out to cut a promo.  Why isn’t the next tournament match happening right now?  He talks about his friend John Cena being fired last week.  He challenges any member of Nexus to come out and face him one on one.

Josh Matthews goes to the Nexus locker room.  Wade Barrett sends out Michael McGillicutty, who is accepting the challenge.  He has on a new Nexus t-shirt.  McGillicutty heads for the arena, but his attacked by someone wearing jean shorts and purple arm bands…  Commercials…

Philadelphia!

The announcers talk about McGillicutty getting jumped.

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: “Dashing” Cody Rhodes vs. John Morrison.  They lock up.  Morrison lands a shoulder block.  He goes for a punch, but Rhodes flinches to protect his face, then goes on the attack.  Morrison avoids Rhodes in the corner and Rhodes hits his face on the turnbuckle pad.  Rhodes bails.  Morrison throws him back in and clotheslines him, then does a face rake with his boot.  Rhodes hits a clothesline and beats up Morrison.  Rhodes whips Morrison into the turnbuckles for 2.  Rhodes hits a knee lift and side Russian leg sweep for 2.  Rhodes hooks Morrison’s arms.  Morrison fights out, but Rhodes hooks them again.  Morrison makes his comeback and hits a side kick for 2.  Rhodes ducks the running knee and gets a schoolboy for 2.  Morrison avoids the Beautiful Disaster and hits the Flying Chuck (they are both the same move), then lands the running knee strike for the pin in 3:37.  Good little match, but short.

Tonight’s guest star is Miss USA, Rima Fakih!  Who?  Also tonight: The Miz!  Commercials!

WWE.com plug.

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: Drew McIntyre vs. Ezekiel Jackson.  Zeke wins the lock up easily and gives a clean break.  They lock up again.  McIntyre pushes Zeke into the corner.  Zeke is amused.  McIntyre slaps him.  Zeke is pissed and commences to kicking ass.  Zeke hits a corner clothesline and splash for 2.  McIntyre pulls Zeke’s head into a discreetly exposed turnbuckle.  Cover gets 2.  McIntyre beats on Zeke.  Zeke tackles him, sending them both through the ropes.  They brawl outside and both get counted out in 2:41.  Lame.  Zeke throws McIntyre back into the ring.  McIntyre goes for the Future Shock.  Zeke back body drops him and clotheslines him out of the ring.  Zeke wins a moral victory, but neither of them advance.  The winner of Sheamus/Kofi Kingston automatically advances to the final.  I’m calling it: the final will be Morrison vs. Sheamus.  Nothing else makes sense.

The Bella Twins check on the injured Daniel Bryan.  Alex Riley bitches at them about dancing girls, then talks to Miz on his douchebag bluetooth earpiece.  Riley talks shit to Bryan, saying that he could have been in Riley’s face.  Bryan says he’s doing fine.  Riley welcomes them to Mizfest 2010.  Commercials.

Philadelphia!

They show the video from last week, where Miz beat Randy Orton for the WWE Championship.

The announcers talk.  Lawler says Randy Orton will miss tonight’s show with a knee injury.

WWE Champion The Miz and Alex Riley come out.  WWE Champion The Miz… I’ve known for a while now that it was only a matter of time before I’d be typing that.  He shows pictures of the shocked and angry little girl in the crowd last week.  I’ve seen that picture everywhere.  Miz cuts his promo.  Miz’s promos are great, but I can’t transcribe promos.  I try to hit key points at best.  Jerry Lawler tires of hearing him babble and goes up from the announce table.  He disapproves of the way Miz backdoored into the title.  Cole gets up and bashes Lawler for bashing his crush.  Lawler says Miz should defend the title tonight.  Cole says Miz may make an example out of Lawler.  King says he’s been here since 1993 and has never had a WWE title match.  He challenges Miz to a title match tonight.  Miz pussies out.  Lawler says Miz isn’t awesome, he’s a coward.  Miz talks shit to Lawler.  The iBooker 9000 sends a text message to someone’s iPhone and gets massive heat.  Cole reads that it’ll be Miz vs. Lawler for the title tonight… in a Tables, Ladders, & Chairs Match!  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Tonight, Miz vs. Lawler in a TLC Match!

King of the Ring Tournament – Quarterfinal: Sheamus vs. Kofi Kingston.  Sheamus goes on the attack.  They both take a bump out of the ring.  Sheamus throws Kofi back in.  Kofi gets the jump on him coming back in.  Sheamus hits the small penis uranage backbreaker for 2.  Sheamus beats on Kofi.  Kofi fights back with punches and kicks and makes his comeback.  Kofi hits the Boom Drop for 2.  Kofi springs to the corner, but Sheamus avoids him and goes for the Razor’s Edge.  Kofi slips out and hits the Trouble In Paradise.  Sheamus rolls to the apron.  Kofi tries to pull him back, but Sheamus grabs the ring skirt for dear life.  Kofi hits the pendulum kick and goes for a diving cross body.  Sheamus sort of catches him in midair with the brogue kick for the pin 4:04.  There wasn’t much to this.  Sheamus gets a BYE to the final.  Commercials.

Non-Title: Mark Henry & Yoshi Tatsu vs. WWE Tag Team Champions Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater of the Nexus.  Yoshi hits an arm drag and a dropkick on Gabriel for 2.  Gabriel hits a jawbreaker and tags out.  Nexus get the heat on Yoshi.  There’s a huge pop in the crowd as John Cena makes his way to the front row, tickets in hand.  Why does he have so many tickets?  Henry gets the hot tag and runs wild.  Henry squashes Slater with a big splash.  Gabriel saves.  Yoshi takes him out.  Slater catches Henry with a kick out of the corner, then goes for a diving cross body.  Henry catches him and hits the World’s Strongest Slam for the pin in 2:29.  Cena immediately jumps the barricade, takes the monitors off the announce table, and gives Slater the Attitude Adjustment through the table.  David Otunga and Husky Harris run out.  Cena bails through the crowd.

Tonight, Miz vs. Lawler in a TLC Match!  Next, Morrison vs. Del Rio!  Commercials!

Philadelphia!

They show the havoc John Cena has wrought tonight.

David Otunga, Husky Harris, and Justin Gabriel discuss Cena backstage.  Wade Barrett tells them they will deal with Cena.  He’s going to go call him out.

Jerry Lawler is getting ready for the match tonight.  Arn Anderson comes in and warns him about the danger of TLC matches.  Lawler isn’t passing up his title shot.  Arn wishes him luck.

Cole and Punk now have to sit behind a busted table.  Couldn’t they get them a plain table?  There are always plenty of them under the ring.

Justin Roberts again introduces Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce Alberto Del Rio.  The semifinal is NEXT!  Commercials!

King of the Ring Tournament – Semifinal: Alberto Del Rio vs. John Morrison.  Del Rio goes on the attack and beats on Morrison.  Morrison catches Del Rio with a boot in the corner and hits a dropkick for 2.  Del Rio pulls Morrison’s arm across the top rope, then sets to work on it.  Morrison makes his comeback and hits a side kick for 2.  Del Rio hits a Codebreaker like move to the arm for 2.  Del Rio beats on Morrison.  Del Rio hits an enzuigiri.  His car horn starts honking.  Rey Mysterio is in Del Rio’s car!  Morrison hits Del Rio with the Flying Chuck for the pin in 3:24.  Fine little match.  Morrison vs. Sheamus is the final, just as I predicted.  Mysterio stands on top of Del Rio’s car.

They show video of tonight’s guest host, Rima Fakih, competing in beauty pageants.

Wade Barrett is headed our way!  Commercials!

WWE Rewind: John Cena costing Wade Barrett the WWE Championship last week.

Wade Barrett comes out to cut a promo.  He’s somehow the only person on the planet who can give John Cena a job.  He realizes Cena attacking Nexus is a ploy to incite Barrett to give him his job back, but he’s not falling for it.  John Cena appears on the TitanTron.  He looks to be behind the arena.  He said he’s just keeping his promise to take out the Nexus.  They talk about how inept WWE security is.  Justin Gabriel, David Otunga, and HuskyHarris corner Cena in the parking lot.  Cena reminds them that he’s not their only enemy.  Vladimir Kozlov, Ezekiel Jackson, David Hart Smith, Darren Young, Mark Henry, Yoshi Tatsu, and Daniel Bryan attack Nexus.  Cena throws Gabriel HEAD FIRST INTO A FUCKING CAR WINDOW.  FUCKING OUCH.  Cena gives Gabriel the Attitude Adjustment onto the car.  Cena says he’ll be back next week to continue attacking Nexus.  Geeze, Gabriel eating that car window looked NASTY.  Commercials.

Tonight, Miz vs. Lawler for the WWE Championship in a TLC Match!

They show the car fucked Justin Gabriel all up, then replay the attack on Nexus.

Maryse, Alicia Fox, & Tamina vs. WWE Divas Champion Natalya, Melina, & Gail Kim.  They show Tamina kissing Santino Marella last week.  Melina and Maryse argue.  Melina kicks her ass.  Maryse bails.  Melina chases her back into the ring and pulls her hair.  Maryse does something and covers for 2.  Fox tags in and very lightly attacks Melina.  Melina sunset flips Fox into her knees.  Santino Marella comes out playing a guitar and singing.  Tamina grabs Santino in a headlock and walks him to the back.  Maryse is like WTF?  Natalya tags in and runs wild on Fox.  Natalya goes for the Sharpshooter.  Gail takes her out.  Natalya locks Fox in the Sharpshooter for the win in 3:33.  Awful.

Awesome Jerry “The King” Lawler video package.

They show Lawler getting ready backstage.  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Ted Dibiase Jr. is playing with a toy WWE belt backstage.  The belt plays Triple H’s music.  I wonder if that is foreshadowing.  Maryse comes in to bitch at him for looking bad and making her look bad.  Dibiase finally tells her to SHUT UP!  Reminds me of the conversations I had with my ex-wife.

Husky Harris and David Otunga are slinking around backstage, discussing John Cena.

Josh Matthews interviews Sheamus and John Morrison.  The tournament final is NEXT!  Commercials!

Justin Roberts introduces the special guest ring announcer for this match: Rima Fakih.  She comes out to awful music, escorted by Santino for some reason, and does a horrible job of ring announcing.

King of the Ring Tournament – Final: Sheamus vs. John Morrison.  They lock up.  Sheamus goes after Morrison’s previously injured arm.  Morrison goes for the Flying Chuck, but Sheamus prevents it and knocks Morrison off the apron.  Commercials.  Sheamus is still working Morrison’s arm.  Sheamus threw him arm first into the barricade during the break.  Morrison’s arm is taking a beating.  Morrison fights back and makes his comeback.  Morrison lands a kick for 2.  Morrison ducks the brogue kick, but Sheamus lands a blow for 2.  Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge, but Morrison slips out and goes for a backslide.  Sheamus counters it.  Morrison lands an elbow smash and a swinging DDT for 2, as Sheamus reaches the ropes.  Morrison goes up top.  Sheamus pulls him down by the arm.  Cover gets 2.  Sheamus works a Fujiwara armbar.  Morrison drops Sheamus with a Pele kick and goes for the Starship Pain.  Sheamus gets his knees up, then lands the brogue kick.  Sheamus hits the Razor’s Edge for the pin in 12:05.  This was actually pretty good.  All hail King Sheamus!  Rima Fakih crowds King Sheamus.  Sheamus cuts a brief Royal Promo.

Miz vs. Lawler is NEXT!  Commercials!

Tables, Ladders, & Chairs Match for the WWE Championship: The Miz (c) (w/ Alex Riley) vs. Jerry “The King” Lawler.  Riley is still carrying the Money In The Bank briefcase for some reason.  Miz wins the lock up and tries to cheap shot Lawler, but Lawler nails him with a great punch.  They lock up again.  Miz slams Lawler and taunts him.  They lock up a third time.  Lawler shoves Miz down.  Miz beats up Lawler and throws him outside.  Riley hands Miz a chair, which he uses to hit Lawler in the back repeatedly.  Miz throws Lawler back into the ring, along with 2 chairs.  He sets the chairs up and tries to suplex Lawler into them.  Lawler reverses and tries a suplex, but Miz lands on his feet.  Miz hits a backbreaker into the chair, then a neckbreaker.  Miz beats up Lawler.  Riley tries to hand Miz a ladder.  Lawler wails on Miz’s back with a chair.  Lawler tries to bring in a ladder.  Riley tries to stop him and gets his ass kicked by the King.  Lawler and Miz play tug of war with the ladder.  Lawler sends the ladder into Miz’s face.  He charges Miz int he corner with the ladder, but Miz avoids the blow and beats Lawler down.  Lawler back body drops Miz onto the ladder.  Riley gets on the apron and clotheslines Lawler.  Riley tries to suplex Lawler out of the ring, but Lawler decks him.  Riley falls off the apron through a table.  Lawler climbs the ladder.  Miz cuts him off and drops him with a big boot.  Miz suplexes Lawler onto a chair, then beats him with the chair some more.  Miz goes up top with the chair.  Lawler cuts him off and crotches him.  Lawler goes for a superplex.  Miz headbutts him down.  Lawler knocks Miz off the top rope through a table!  Cole leaves the table to help his boyfriend.  Lawler climbs the ladder.  Cole gets in the ring and grabs his foot.  That little fucker!  Lawler is like WTF?  DECK HIM!  LAWLER DECKS COLE!  Lawler starts beating the shit out of him.  Miz climbs the ladder.  Lawler climbs the other side and decks him.  They fight on top of the ladder.  Miz sends the belt into Lawler’s head.  Lawler falls off.  Miz takes down the belt to win in 11:52.  Really good match.

Very enjoyable show with a couple of really good matches.

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