WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 8/13/10

WWE open, Smackdown open, pyro and ballyhoo.  Todd Grisham and Matt Striker are the announcers TAPED from San Jose, California.

Vickie Guerrero is in the ring.  Ugh.  She introduces the NEW Intercontinental Champion, Dolph Ziggler.  They show the finish of the match last week where Ziggler beat Kofi Kingston for the title thanks to a distraction from Vickie.  Vickie puts Ziggler over with a bunch of hyperbole.  Ziggler puts over Vickie.  Vickie trashes the city, as if she needed any more heat.  Vickie wants to go to Tahiti.  I want her to go there and fucking STAY.  Kofi Kingston runs out and kicks Ziggler’s ass.  Teddy Long comes out and announces Ziggler vs. Kingston for the title at SummerSlam and Ziggler vs. Rey Mysterio for TONIGHT!  Vickie books Kofi vs. Kane for tonight.  Long says he’s the GM and he has the power, Vickie is just a consultant.  She’s definitely insulting.  Kofi says he’ll face Kane RIGHT NOW!

Video of this convoluted Kane/Rey Mysterio storyline.

Kofi vs. Kane is NEXT!

Jamie Keyes is the ring announcer.  Ugh.  Where is Tony Chimel this week?

Non-Title: Kofi Kingston vs. World Heavyweight Champion Kane.  Kofi lands some kicks.  Kane lands some heavy punches.  Kofi does the corner punches.  Kane hits a sidewalk slam for 2.  Kane tries to go up top, but Kofi lands a kick to send him to the floor.  Kofi hits Kane with a tope suicida.  Kofi goes for the Trouble In Paradise, but Kane ducks and Kofi connects with the ring post.  Kane goes to work on the injured leg.  Kofi tries to fight back and goes up top, but Kane catches him and chokeslams him down.  Kane hits the Tombstone Piledriver for the pin in 4:53.  Fine little match.  Kane cuts a promo on Rey Mysterio after the match.  Mysterio comes out to retort and accuses Kane of taking out Undertaker.  Same old shit with the promos.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Christian comes out for a match against Cody Rhodes.  Drew McIntyre has a conversation with Rhodes backstage before the match.

Christian vs. “Dashing” Cody Rhodes.  Rhodes beats up Christian and goes after the arm McIntyre fucked up a couple of weeks ago.  Christian backdrops him to the floor and wipes him out with a dive.  Insta-commercials.  Rhodes works on Christian’s bad shoulder.  Rhodes does the old Hardcore Holly kick to the balls, then drops Christian on his shoulder for 2.  Rhodes beats up Christian in the corner.  Christian hits a diving cross body for 2.  Christian throws a lariat with the bad arm, then hits a knee lift.  Christian hits the diving European uppercut.  Christian hits a sunset flip for 2.  Rhodes slams Christian for 2.  Christian punches Rhodes in the face and hits the reverse DDT for 2.  Rhodes covers his face up, then pokes Christian in the eye and throws the bad shoulder into the post.  Rhodes hits the Cross Rhodes for the pin (5:30 shown).  Fine little match.

Tonight, Matt Hardy vs. Drew McIntyre #427!  Also, Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler!

WWE Smack of the Night: The Straight Edge Society fucking up Big Show’s hand 2 weeks ago.

Handicap Match: The Big Show vs. Derek Werley, Jody Reese, & Fernando Vega.  The Straight Edge Society come out to watch.  Punk has on an “I Broke Big Show’s Hand” shirt!  Show destroys the jobbers, chokeslams 2 of them, then kills the last one with the KO punch for the pin in 1:13, all with the broken hand.  SQUASH.  Luke Gallows starts to cut a promo on Show, then Punk bitches him out for talking and cuts the promo himself.  I get the feeling that soon the SES, or at least Gallows, is going to get sick of Punk and turn on him.

Matt Hardy is headed our way!  Kelly Kelly greets him along the way.  He’ll be in action NEXT!  I pray that’s the end of Kelly Kelly for tonight.

Matt Hardy vs. Drew McIntyre.  McIntyre goes for a big boot immediately.  Hardy avoids it and kicks his ass.  McIntyre kicks Hardy’s ass in return.  Hardy clotheslines McIntyre out of the ring and they brawl outside.  McIntyre sends Hardy into the barricade.  Hardy backdrops McIntyre over the barricade and onto a chair.  Hardy hits the Side Effect at ringside.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  Hardy cranks on McIntyre’s neck, then hits a reverse drop move for 2.  Hardy goes up top.  McIntyre pulls him down and hits a sit-out powerbomb for 2.  McIntyre lands a blow for 2, then pounds on Hardy and cranks on his shoulder.  Hardy tackles McIntyre and they both go to the floor.  McIntyre sends Hardy into the steps and pounds on him.  McIntyre traps Hardy’s leg in the steps and stomps on it, presumably injuring his ankle.  Hardy takes his boot off and barely makes it back into the ring.  McIntyre hits the Future Shock for the pin in 5:44.  There looks to be blood seeping through Hardy’s sock.  Okay match.  The story of McIntyre injuring people continues.

Raw Rebound.

Tonight, Ziggler vs. Mysterio!

WWE Rewind: The Rey Mysterio/Jack Swagger No DQ Match from 2 weeks ago that ended up in the Gulf of Mexico.

Jack Swagger comes out and cuts a promo.  He trashes the people, then whines about having sand in his vagina or something.  He then talks about his dad having the poops. MVP comes out and rips on him for being a whiny little girl.  They bring up some shit from last year.  MVP reminds Swagger that he beat him at SummerSlam last year.  Swagger attacks MVP with the microphone, then throws him into the barricade.  Insta-commercials.

Jack Swagger vs. Montel Vontavious Porter.  Swagger beats up MVP.  MVP tries to fight back, but Swagger hits a lariat for 2.  Swagger clamps on an arm lock.  MVP fights out and tries a headscissors, but Swagger face plants him and goes for the ankle lock.  MVP gets the ropes.  Swagger puts the boots to MVP.  Swagger hits a powerslam and goes for the sprinboard Vader Bomb, but MVP gets his knees up.  MVP hits an Exploder and makes his comeback.  MVP goes for the Ballin’ elbow, but Swagger gets up and mows him down with a big boot.  Swagger goes for the ankle lock, but MVP turns it into a front cradle for the pin in 4:05.  It was fine.  I wonder who Swagger pissed off that has him jobbing to MVP.

“Dashing” Cody Rhodes gives grooming tips about ear wax.  That’s useful information.

Alberto Del Rio vignette, which is basically a highlight video of all of his vignettes.  He debuts next week!

Grisham and Striker hype the SummerSlam card.

The main event is NEXT!

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

Non-Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vickie Guerrero).  Awesome fast paced wrestling to start, then Ziggler whips Mysterio into the corner hard and kicks the shit out of him.  Mysterio gets a schoolboy for 2.  Mysterio hits a headscissors and a dropkick for 2.  Ziggler hits a neckbreaker for 2.  Ziggler grounds Mysterio with a rear chin lock.  Mysterio escapes and goes for the 619, but Kane’s pyro goes off to distract him.  Kane comes out pushing a casket.  Insta-commercials.  Ziggler has Mysterio in a rear chin lock.  Kane and his casket are at ringside.  Ziggler hits a stun gun, then rams Mysterio’s head into the apron for 2.  Ziggler hits a bunch of elbow drops for 2.  Ziggler goes back tot he rear chin lock.  Mysterio fights out and tries for a German or something, but settles for sending Ziggler’s shoulder into the post.  Mysterio hits the springboard Bombs Away and the rebound cross body for 2.  Mysterio rolls through a sunset flip and kicks Ziggler in the face, then hits another seated senton for 2.  Ziggler hits a straight jacket electric chair suplex for 2.  I’m sure there’s a better name for that.  Ziggler goes for the sleeper hold, but Mysterio avoids it, goes for a quebrada, kind of fucks up, goes for the sleeper himself and fails.  That was a long sentence.  Ziggler goes for the sleeper again, but Mysterio counters and goes for the 619.  Ziggler avoids it, then Mysterio gets a cradle for the pin (9:06 shown).  Kane goes after Mysterio.  They fight, then Mysterio dropkicks Kane into the casket.  Kane gets out and runs away.

Good show for the most part, but I’m really sick of this Kane angle.

One Response to “WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 8/13/10”

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