WWE Friday Night Smackdown! 10/15/10

WWE open, Smackdown open.  Portland, Oregon!

The Undertaker is standing on an upper level of the Rose Garden looking out at whatever is there.

Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, and Matt Striker are the announcers.  Tonight, Paul Bearer has a challenge for The Undertaker!  Tony Chimel is the ring announcer.

Smackdown GM Teddy Long is in the ring to talk about Bragging Rights.  He announces a series of qualifying matches for tonight.

Team Smackdown Qualifying Match: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. WWE Tag Team Champion “Dashing” Cody Rhodes.  They lock up as Striker makes up some bullshit about what you get if you win Bragging Rights.  Rey tries to do his speedy stuff, but Rhodes drops him with a shot and beats him up.  Rhodes kicks Mysterio in the head for 2.  Rhodes keeps the heat on Mysterio.  Mysterio gets Rhodes into 619 position, but Rhodes bails.  Commercials.  Rhodes has Mysterio in a chin lock on the mat.  I definitely wasn’t expecting that when we returned from commercials.  Mysterio escapes and gets a cradle for 2.  Rhodes hits a dropkick for 2.  Rhodes applies a neck and shoulder lock.  Mysterio gets a rope break.  Rhodes hits an enzui knee drop for 2.  Mysterio tries to do his wheelbarrow bulldog thing, but he fucks it up.  Rhodes saves it by hitting a wheelbarrow suplex for 2.  Rhodes goes for a diving knee drop to the knee, but Mysterio avoids it.  Mysterio hits a drop toe hold into the turnbuckles and makes his comeback.  Rhodes rolls through a cross body for 2.  Mysterio rolls through a sunset flip and kicks Rhodes in the head for 2.  Mysterio hits a springboard guillotine leg drop to the back of Rhodes’ head for 2.  Rhodes goes for the Alabama Slam, but Mysterio counters out and hits a headscissors.  Mysterio follows with the 619 and the springboard splash for the pin in 10:35.  Fine match here.  This is way better than the garbage on Impact.

Paul Bearer challenges The Undertaker NEXT!  Commercials.

Green Day plug, because they do the horrible new SD theme.

Portland!

The Big Show is backstage with Hornswoggle.  Hornswoggle stole Big Show’s candy bar.  Kaval comes in.  He wants to be on Team Smackdown.  Show doesn’t think he’s good/big/experienced enough.  He says Kaval wouldn’t last 5 minutes in the ring with him.  Kaval challenges Show to a 5 minute match tonight, where if he lasts, he’s on the team.  Show agrees.  Hornswoggle and Show bicker some more.

In a pre-taped video, Paul Bearer challenged The Undertaker to face Kane in a Buried Alive Match at Bragging Rights.  Of course, it’s unnecessarily long and complicated.  Commercials.

WWE bullshit fact of the night.

The Big Show comes out to do commentary for a while.

Team Smackdown Qualifying Match: Jack Swagger (w/ The Swagger Soaring Eagle) vs. Montel Vontavious Porter.  Ugh, these two again?  MVP beats up Swagger.  MVP hits a Yakuza kick to the side of the head for 2.  MVP grounds & pounds Swagger.  Swagger throws MVP’s shoulder into the post.  MVP misses a corner Yakuza kick.  MVP hits a knee face buster and the Ballin’ elbow.  Swagger bails.  MVP follows.  The eagle gets in the way, so MVP throws it over the announce table.  Swagger throws MVP into the steps, then back into the ring.  Swagger locks in the ankle lock for the win in 2:14.  Short and inoffensive.  It was fine while it lasted.

The Undertaker is still looking outside from the upper level of the Rose Garden.  Everyone assumes he heard the challenge, but as far as we know he’s been out there the whole time and there’s probably not a TV out there.  Commercials.

WWE does stuff for Make A Wish!

Tony Chimel introduces Alberto Del Rio’s personal ring announcer, Ricardo Rodriguez.

Team Smackdown Qualifying Match: Alberto Del Rio vs. Chris Masters.  They lock up.  Del Rio beats on Masters.  Masters h its a Jackhammer for 2.  Masters goes for the Master Lock.  Del Rio gets the ropes, then pulls Masters’ arm across the top rope.  Del Rio attacks Masters’ arm.  Masters hits a Samoan drop and makes his comeback.  Masters hits a powerslam for 2.  Masters for the Master Lock again, but Del Rio counters with an awesome Codebreaker to the arm.  Del Rio locks in the Minoru Special for the win in 2:24.  Fun little TV match.  Show offers Del Rio a handshake, but Del Rio just winks at him.

Knucklehead trailer.

Edge is headed our way.  He encounters Rosa Mendez, who is randomly exercising backstage as usual.  Commercials.

Team Smackdown Qualifying Match: Edge vs. WWE Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler.  They show the stupid shit with Dolph, Kaitlyn, and Vickie Guerrero from last week.  Ugh.  Anyway, they lock up and wrestle.  Big Show, great man that he is, tells Striker to shut up about the stupid storyline and focus on the match.  Unfortunately, they ruin that by showing Vickie and Kaitlyn watching backstage.  After some other stuff happened, Ziggler hits the Perfect neck snap for 2.  Cover again for 2.  Ziggler grabs a chin lock.  Edge fights out.  Ziggler slides out of the ring and eats a baseball slide dropkick.  Back inside, Ziggler beats on Edge.  Ziggler tries to set up a tornado DDT and takes a bump to the floor.  Edge tries to spear Ziggler on the floor, but hits the barricade.  Ziggler hits the Zig Zag into the steps.  Edge barely beats the count into the ring.  Ziggler beats on him.  Commercials.  Ziggler has a hold locked in.  Of course.  Edge avoids a corner splash and hits a flapjack.  Edge makes his comeback.  He hits a weird takedown thing for 2.  Edge rolls through a diving sunset flip and catapults Ziggler into the post.  Edge hits the Edge-O-Matic for 2.  Ziggler goes for the sleeper hold.  Edge counters and hits the Edgecution for 2.  Ziggler sends Edge into the post and goes for the Zig Zag, but Edge holds on to the ropes, then goes for the spear.  Ziggler leapfrogs him and tries to come off the top, but Edge spears him in midair for the pin in 12:56.  Fine match.  Show shakes Edge’s hand.  Edge signs an autograph on the way to the back.  See, he’s a good guy now!

Undertaker is STILL outside!  Commercials!

Portland!

Raw Rebound!

Team Smackdown Qualifying Match (for Kaval): The Big Show vs. Kaval.  They shake hands.  Kaval tries to throw some kicks and gets swatted down.  Show hits him with the big chop, then stands on his back.  Show picks Kaval up and headbutts him, then stands on his chest.  Show hits a body slam.  Show keeps beating up Kaval.  Kaval tries to fight back.  Big Show looks mildly annoyed and chops the shit out of him again.  Show throws him across the ring and just keeps destroying him.  Show throws Kaval out of the ring, then palms his head and pulls him back in.  Kaval finally starts to make his comeback and knocks Show to a knee.  Show gets Kaval up for the chokeslam, then the time limit expires in 5:01.  Kaval qualifies for Smackdown by surviving being massacred for 4 1/2 minutes.  Show gives Kaval props.  Commercials.

Kaval is still in the ring.  Tyler Reks comes out to talk shit about Kaval.  Nobody knows who he is.  I barely remember who the fuck he is.  He wants to fight Kaval for his spot.  Teddy Long comes out and says no, because Kaval just got his ass kicked.  Kaval stupidly volunteers to put his spot on the line anyway, so Teddy makes the match.

Team Smackdown Qualifying Match: Kaval vs. Tyler Reks.  Kaval lands some kicks and goes up top.  Reks avoids the Warrior’s Way and kicks his ass.  Reks hits sort of a reverse F-U (like a Burning Hammer into a side drop) for the pin in 54 seconds.  Tyler Fucking Reks?  Are you serious?  Commercials.

Cody Rhodes gives grooming tips.

Team Smackdown Qualifying Match: WWE Tag Team Champion Drew McIntyre vs. Kofi Kingston.  They lock up.  McIntyre beats up Kofi in the corner.  Kofi responds in kind.  He charges McIntyre in the corner, but McIntyre catches him with raised boots for 2.  McIntyre beats up Kofi on the outside and suplexes him onto the apron.  Back inside, cover gets 2.  McIntyre goes for a backdrop suplex, but Kofi lands on top for 2.  Kofi hits the Trouble In Paradise out of nowhere for the pin in 2:18.  Not much of a match.  Kofi is the last man on the Smackdown team, which includes Tyler Fucking Reks.  I’m still flabbergasted at that.

The Undertaker finally came in from the cold!  Commercials!

World Heavyweight Champion Kane and Paul Bearer come out.  Kane cuts a promo.  The Undertaker comes out and beats up Kane.  Kane runs away.  Undertaker makes lightning strike at Kane and Bearer on the ramp.  Seriously.  Striker assumes this means that Taker accepts the challenge.

Okay show.  Nothing awful aside from the fact that Tyler Freaking Reks is on the Bragging Rights team.